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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber

@shiatori.bsky.social

230 followers 190 following 580 posts

Pooka changeling 🐀 Artist and vtuber on Twitch Ace/Agender/Polyam ♥ Any pronouns Member of @pinkfuzzybunnies.bsky.social and @v-eu.bsky.social https://shiatori.carrd.co/

shiatori.carrd.co

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · Jan 19

I'm Shiatori, a pooka artist and vtuber that loves rats and cheese! When I'm not plotting-scheming with my mischief, you can find me live on www.twitch.tv/shiatori drawing some art or playing some random games 🐀🎀

#promosky #vtuber #ENvtuber #PNGtuber #vsky #vartist #vtartist #ratclan

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 20h

My brain is only half here and I forgot! >_<
The vtuber I got to draw for is @ratanguis.vtubers.social

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 22h

Here's my contribution! I'm a bit sad that I couldn't finish the drawing myself, since I had to be hospitalized, but @eggroyale.bsky.social did an amazing job with the colors!

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Reposted by Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber

Egg Royale 🍳👑 @eggroyale.bsky.social · 1d

THE FINAL REVEAL IS HERE!
THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR AMAZING WORK!
Credits to everyone in the comments!

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 2d

Well then...

Grief

You create from grief. It is an endless grief that pours out of your eyes and mouth and fingertips over and over again; a grief too vast to be contained. It demands an outlet, and so for you the act of creation is much like weeping. Your work is a memorial to everything you have loved and lost, all you have longed for and been denied. Much like crying, pouring your grief out into your art brings you relief. The feeling of loss pervades your work, but the depth of your grief also speaks to the depth of the love that preceded it. After all, every tragedy is only what it is because someone had loved something enough to grieve it.

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 10d

They all have been very nice and understanding. I just feel bad that all this controls my life so much as to prevent me from doing things I love.

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 10d

Because of everything happening I had to say "no" to 3 collabs today and I feel terrible about it....

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 10d

I wanted to add a bit more of context, with alt text for readability.
I don't know if I'm gonna be believed as I know I have no proof of anything that has happened to me. However I can't keep quiet anymore. This is incredibly personal and harmful to me, so please treat it with respect.

I just want to confirm that everything said in this document has been read and written alongside me.

It's been a difficult read and a painful exercise of trying to recall traumatic events, but I am tired and sick of being silenced and treated like a shameful memory that shouldn't exist in this world.

I invite Jester to share their own side of the story, and provide any proof or logs as I no longer have any of them with me. There's nothing I wish more than to learn what I did wrong so I can become a better person. I do not want for anyone else to feel so hurt by me in such a way that makes them believe I deserve this sort of treatment.

I want to reiterate that this is not about who is a good or a bad person. I firmly believe that both Jester and I are victims of unfortunate circumstances and misunderstandings. From my part I wanted nothing more than to heal and create happy memories together, from vtubing, streaming, and just hanging out. Despite everything that is mentioned in the document, I still care for them deeply, and part of what has made me withhold sharing this pain until now is that I know they are terrified of this story going public and, from what I know about their delicate mental state, I fear that they may act in a harmful way towards themselves. If you are someone that is close to them, please, make sure that they are being cared for...

As for me, yes, I am getting professional help. I am scheduled for a psychiatric evaluation on Tuesday, and while I won't know the specifics until then, my therapist has suggested mood stabilizers as a treatment, since there's been concerns about me being bipolar after my last meds caused me to experience a hypomanic episode. They also suggested targeted therapy focused on dealing with trauma and abuse, as well as possibly joining a therapy group where I can share my experiences with other people, a part from the online group I already am in.

For obvious reasons, I am taking a break from streaming and social media, though I'll still participate on some events such as the Rainbow Vtuber Project, the Creative Carousel, and artist alley tables. My physical, mental health, and life circumstances have prevented me from pursuing my dream for too long and my own cancer scare, as well as having several close relatives either battling or dying from cancer in these recent years have made me become very aware of how short and unpredictable life is, and I do not want to waste any more time. I just want to smile, and make others smile.

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 11d

Happy Birthday Taru ❤️

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 12d

Fair xD

Reposted by Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber

Nascha Noctua is on HIATUS 🪶⚔️【NTVTN】 @naschanoctua.vtubers.social · 13d

🙃

A picture of a fat little kitten looking angrily at the camera. He is puffy as all hell. Text reads: i'm seriously at my fucking fucking limit."

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 12d

I am gremlin xD

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 13d

All this to say that I wanted to stream the new Arcaea update today but I'm terrified about tomorrow so I don't want to add any stressors right now. I just want to be able to stream, draw, be happy, and make others happy... is that too much to ask?

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 13d

My mental health has been declining as of late to a point where my therapist has cancelled our appointments because my meds aren't working and I need specialized care. I have gotten an urgent referral for a psychiatric evaluation that, if everything goes ok, is gonna be tomorrow...

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 13d

Egg draws in "Club Penguin", featuring shoulder rat xD

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Reposted by Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber

Lily (Nymonia) | Cowgirl VTuber @nymonia.bsky.social · 13d

Remember:

VTubers are people.
VTubers can be PNG, 3D, Live2D-- doesn't make a difference, whichever way you do it makes you a VTuber.

We aren't cold and emotionless people devoid of any goals and/or aspirations-- we live, we breathe, we dream, we exist. We laugh, we cry, we persevere.

#vtuber

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Reposted by Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber

Sky(He/They) 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ @highwithsky.live · 14d

Saw someone else's art on Instagram about their struggles with mental health and decided to draw how I have been feeling recently.

Not sure when and if I'll finish this piece but it was nice to get some of that emotion out.

Maybe my art can help someone else too.
#mentalhealthmatters

Digital art of HighWithSkys OC crash curled up on the ground disheveled and hurt with three phrases around them.
Top Right: Why aren't you better yet!?
Middle left: This is all your fault!
Bottom Right: What is wrong with you!?

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 13d

I relate to this too. You're not alone... 🫂

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 13d

Ohhh that looks tasty!

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 13d

Congraaats! 🎉

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 14d

Fine... I'm adding my circle of cool people too :3

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Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 14d

a man wearing a suit and a watch is talking

ALT: a man wearing a suit and a watch is talking

media.tenor.com

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 14d

a man in a yellow shirt is sitting in a chair holding a cup and pointing

ALT: a man in a yellow shirt is sitting in a chair holding a cup and pointing

media.tenor.com

Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber @shiatori.bsky.social · 14d

Grew up forced to be the perfect child for my parents. "You don't deserve praise for doing what you're supposed to", they said.

My reward is to drop out of college twice, get fired from multiple jobs, and get told by someone I loved "You're too sensitive, we can't be friends".

Pina ✨ ADHD Alien @adhd-alien.bsky.social · 15d

When the reward for growing up with so much criticism is hearing „You’re just too sensitive!

Panel 1:
A hand extends a single red brick toward the character. The character looks surprised and slightly sad as they reach out to take it. Text: “It’s hard for people to understand why small comments can make me so emotional,”
Behind the character, there’s already a small pile of red bricks on the ground.

Panel 2:
The character now holds the brick close to their chest, looking down with a pained expression. The pile of red bricks behind them has grown into a large heap, stretching far into the background. Text: “because they can’t see how many times I’ve been criticized for the same thing, over and over again.”

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Reposted by Shiatori 🐀🎀 PookaTuber

Pina ✨ ADHD Alien @adhd-alien.bsky.social · 15d

When the reward for growing up with so much criticism is hearing „You’re just too sensitive!

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