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smallestchurch.bsky.social
smallest church
@smallestchurch.bsky.social
1.7K followers 740 following 3.9K posts
hey, it's me, amy. queer, insufferable, pie & raccoon influencer. she’s built like a steakhouse but she handles like a bistro. she/her
https://archiveofourown.org/users/smallestchurch/works
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smallestchurch.bsky.social
smallest church @smallestchurch.bsky.social · Mar 6
Please enjoy: It Exists to Be Found, a (hopefully) lynchian AU wherein Stede Bonnet reads a book about pirates and sees his name next to the name Ed Teach. That night, he starts having dreams...
archiveofourown.org/works/636465...
graphic for IT EXISTS TO BE FOUND / AN OFMD AU BY SMALLESTCHURCH with text over a photo of a diner mug of coffee on a saucer in perfect pale powder blue
smallestchurch.bsky.social
i just love black bean soup ok
black bean soup in a red bowl next to a small salad
December 9, 2025 at 12:59 AM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
finally had some free time to noodle and it turned out what i needed to do instead was have a big old cry
December 8, 2025 at 9:45 PM
Reposted by smallest church
shraaamp.bsky.social
God tier timeline juxtaposition.
Screenshot of a skeet that says "they should make a sitting position that is comfortable" and a skeet of art underneath with a person sitting on another person's face
December 8, 2025 at 8:11 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
they should invent a sitting position that is comfortable
December 8, 2025 at 3:54 PM
Reposted by smallest church
thomasha.bsky.social
"No one is helpless. No one is beyond helping." One part of the Log Lady's message in Twin Peaks: The Final Dossier I read today. All of the Log Lady's segments in the extra intros and supplemental material is getting to me way more these days. Think I used to just gloss over them.
No one is helpless. No one is beyond helping. It is good to seek out those who need us and do what we can for them. I recommend that. There is nothing that can't be done if we set our minds to doing it. Don't be sad. Be happy you have another day to do what needs doing. We only have so many of them. We are born into this world, not another one. It's not perfect, but it is what it is. This world presents some simple, certain truths. It helps us grow if we accept them, but many of these truths seem to trouble or frighten us. For instance, there is no light without darkness--and this troubles many of us--but without it, how else would we tell one from the other? We spend half of every day in darkness; surely we should make out peace with this. You may decide to see this as a metaphor. Many people do. I see it as a fact. Metaphors are beautiful ways of speaking about the truth. So are facts. Both tell us that time--and light, and darkness--moves in cycles. We move through them, too, often as passengers, but if our eyes are open, there is much to be learned along the way. A traveler learns more than a passenger. When darkness comes, a traveler learns to be brave, for they know the light will return. Anyone who's spent a night alone in the woods learns this.
December 8, 2025 at 6:27 AM
Reposted by smallest church
asisherright.bsky.social
We don't see color 😌

– Pantone, the world's foremost authority on color
December 6, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Reposted by smallest church
ghostalservice.bsky.social
HEY USA FRIENDS it’s holiday season at the post office so here’s my annual thread on how to make all of your postal workers have a nicer month!

1. Be nice and prepared if you’re mailing things! You might have to wait! Still be polite and click the smiley face on the stupid little screen!
December 4, 2025 at 7:10 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
in most cases i am team "they tell you to vote with your wallet bc they have bigger wallets" but sp0tify is certified evil, an adtech firm that chose music at random for small file sizes, a defense contractor that exists solely to rob and sideline artists and spy on you. i won't give my money to DHS
rbreich.bsky.social Robert Reich @rbreich.bsky.social · 4d
Spotify has laid off thousands in recent years, while reportedly paying artists $0.003 per stream.

Spotify profits rose 28% in Q3. Its CEO is worth $9.8 billion. It's making money off ICE recruitment ads.

Don't you think it's time put a wrap on corporate greed and exploitation?
December 4, 2025 at 9:36 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
my ao3 stats are my one finished short fic (love me different) and my one WIP long fic (SORRY IT'S COMING I SWEAR) and i barely read at all because this was the year to TOTALLY LOCK IN to this draft rewrite, i live in it, i dream about it, i won a grant for it, i am in my stubborn scorp era
December 4, 2025 at 7:44 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
try to fold it. go ahead. i fucking dare you
cat sitting atop a pile of fresh laundry and looking MURDEROUS about being discovered
December 4, 2025 at 3:18 AM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
when i tell you i am CRYING
benedictsred.bsky.social Jason, ex Inferis @benedictsred.bsky.social · 5d
When she boutta hark on it
Two very innocent Xmas angels
December 3, 2025 at 11:53 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
receiving word that claude the albino alligator at cal academy has died 😭
December 2, 2025 at 10:04 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
inhaled two chapters of this over coffee this morning AND YOU SHOULD TOO
miaugly.bsky.social Mia Ugly @miaugly.bsky.social · 6d
She's here! My 3:10 to Yuma AU with @intheblanketfort.bsky.social for the OFMD Big Bang is posted for your pleasure. Good horses! Sharp-shooting! Happy endings that fly in the face of the source material! Link below. The art is truly next level and this is about to become a Caly appreciation blog.
December 2, 2025 at 5:10 PM
Reposted by smallest church
dly.bsky.social
reverse advent calendar where I scream a little scream into each tiny box and close it up tight
December 1, 2025 at 10:27 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
chair company finale what the fuck
December 2, 2025 at 1:14 AM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
when the lights r on but nobody’s home
black and white cat on his back who looks like he has never had a single thought in his life
November 29, 2025 at 3:49 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
stede showing ed the auxiliary wardrobe
November 29, 2025 at 3:45 AM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
i truly don’t know. big messy human feelings, communication struggles, big-hearted trying, recurring bits, sensory details, vague geography often inspired by san francisco, public transit, dinner, grief as growth, conflict as intimacy
oatmilktruther.bsky.social roach’s malewife @oatmilktruther.bsky.social · 12d
recurring abs fic things: oatmilk, stede gets nose kisses, dolphin hatred, men crying, no sex at the climax even if its rated E, no caps on proper nouns, “this rocks”, repeating homonyms or two words spelled the same that mean something different, hm tell me if i missed any or quote w ur own!
November 28, 2025 at 2:49 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
just bragging on my guinness pie
guinness pie, top down guinness pie, with a cut taken out whole table spread: coconut collard greens, biscuits, caramelized mystery garden squash with toasted pecans, random quick sautéed mushrooms bc i had extra, guinness pie at center
November 27, 2025 at 10:32 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
it is time
screenshot of tidal playing arlo guthrie’s thanksgiving day massacre masterpiece alice’s restaurant
November 27, 2025 at 7:40 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
hello from the prize turkey
black and cat with big yellow eyes sitting on my coffee table
November 27, 2025 at 3:44 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
i yap way too much but it took me SO LONG to figure out why “car” was so big, i was like there is no way i post about my car more than my cat or my pies 😂
bskyinsights.com
word cloud for this dumb profile
November 27, 2025 at 2:18 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
this thread reminded me that i once made a zine of NYT cooking comments as a patreon reward, pls enjoy 🔪🍎🍋🍸
smallestchurch.bsky.social smallest church @smallestchurch.bsky.social · 12d
omg i found it. pls enjoy
my hand holding a zine called this is THIS IS HELPFUL: A ZINE OF NEW YORK TIMES COOKING COMMENTS the full zine file (i am so sorry there is no way to alt text the entire thing)
November 26, 2025 at 7:47 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
tell me what you're cooking that you're excited about! i love kitchen drama. i am forgoing the turkey in favor of a low and very slow braise of some good brisket in guinness that will ultimately be a pie. and since dinner is pie, dessert will be be a cranberry cheesecake.
November 26, 2025 at 5:16 PM
smallestchurch.bsky.social
here, a lil it exists to be found wip : )
He shifts, and his eternally spying phone on the coffee table before him lights up for no reason. No messages, no calls, just white numerals in front of an image of the sea. Or, the blasted phone knows he wants to call Ed. The idea tortures him. He’s taken to leaving the phone in his office at night, lest he reach for it in some in-between dreamstate and press the forbidden button. He’s so desperate for answers, he talks to himself in the shower, in the kitchen, playing out conversations and arguments (and reconciliations) like he’s rehearsing for a play. Like if he can just mock up the perfect interaction, he’ll know what to do. _Ed, I don’t understand. Why?_ _I’m only a man, Stede. Only a man in love._ Outrageous. Absurd. Two-bit fanfiction. But Lucius would tell him to call. Olu too, probably. He fishes a quarter out of the catchall vintage ashtray on the table, hiding beneath several mystery bits of plastic his kids have deposited there. He positions it on his thumb, flips it into the air. As the quarter ascends, time slows. Warps. As though to allow him ample space to understand that he already knows exactly how he wants it to land. The coin flips three, four, five times. He watches, head tilted, heart speeding as time slows. This is it, he understands. The coin will land on heads, and he will pick up his phone and have no choice but to call Ed because the universe willed it, it was beyond his control— The coin drops smoothly, silently to the table. Against all odds and laws of physics, the quarter sticks the landing like a gymnast coming off the uneven bars with her tiny feet touching: it stands tall on its edge, taunting him. He throws it across the room.
November 26, 2025 at 4:56 PM