Just coming on here to say that I’m alive lol

Quit DBT today now I’m scared that I made the wrong decision cause I’ve literally been hitting myself for the past 3 days after not hitting myself for nearly two months. I almost made it to two months

Forcing myself to keep playing Fantasy Life because it was $60 and I got bored after 5 hours 😭

Am I so delusional to think that everyone is a little bit BPD? How are people just out here without it lmao

She left the door open for me to follow! Unfortunately where I have DBT, you can’t have a therapist that doesn’t work there. However, with my therapists’ experience + knowledge, we can continue with DBT-informed therapy. I may just go this route!

She did tell me I could contact her if it’s not working out for me, and we can switch to DBT-informed therapy instead of the full program. Tbh my main motivation to stick to DBT was getting to keep her as a therapist. Now that she’s not there, I have less motivation/reinforcement

Thinking about quitting DBT just so I can follow my therapist back to her private practice. Neither of us wanted it to end, but she was not being treated right within the program, and quit. She’s been my therapist for a year and I can’t imagine opening up to the therapist they replaced her with

The Clair Obscur Expedition 33 soundtrack >>>>>

The drive home after picking up Chinese food is TORTURE. Why does it have to smell so good

In a 2017-2018 Cardi B kick once again

I’m going to fucking spiral.

I became a reader again this year and I’m so proud of myself. I went from reading half a book a year to 8 books so far this year 😊

33 days clean of any self harm. I’m so proud of myself. Next goal is 3 months

In 8 days I’ll be 30 days clean of self-harm. That falls on Mother’s Day, which reminds me that by treating myself better, I can BE better for my daughter 🩷 BPD isn’t easy, and if you’re struggling with SH like I do, we’re in this together

Red rising #booksky

Currently reading 2 books. One of them is Red Rising, which I’m a little over halfway through. I also decided to use my Fable ebook credits to buy One Dark Window. Only one chapter deep so far. Both have captured my interest!

You know it was a decent day in group DBT when Spirited Away gets brought up (unrelated to skills though lmao)

2 split seconds of Easter

I did what I shouldn’t and bought 2 new games on Steam.

Everyone and their mother father and grandma is out today and I’m overstimulated. I am probably also the reason for someone else’s overstimulation lmao

Editing newborn video sessions, make me emotional 🥹

Time for group, my least favorite part of DBT, but the most important 😭

My goal throughout DBT is to eliminate self-harm completely. To get to that point, I need to improve emotional instability and feelings of emptiness. That would be a life worth living to me 😌

I’m usually not anxious for typical individual therapy but today I wanna throw up! 🙃 everything is fine