Startpage
@startpage.com
Imagine a universe where you can explore freely — no tracking, no targeting. That world exists. It’s called Startpage private search.
self-care used to mean “nap.” now it means “dry brush your lymph nodes while chanting your intentions into a wooden bowl carved from ethically distressed bamboo.” i miss when we were allowed to be crusty.
December 27, 2025 at 8:00 PM
self-care used to mean “nap.” now it means “dry brush your lymph nodes while chanting your intentions into a wooden bowl carved from ethically distressed bamboo.” i miss when we were allowed to be crusty.
EU regulators waking up like “i smell ANTICOMPETITIVE SHENANIGANS.” meanwhile Meta’s over here acting like this is routine housekeeping. Babe this isn’t housekeeping, you just set the house on fire and called it a feature. https://ow.ly/RpsK50XNkKO
EU investigating Meta over policy change that bans rival AI chatbots from WhatsApp | TechCrunch
The European Commission is launching an antitrust investigation into Meta's move to ban other AI companies from using WhatsApp's business tools to offer their own AI chatbots to users.
ow.ly
December 27, 2025 at 5:00 PM
EU regulators waking up like “i smell ANTICOMPETITIVE SHENANIGANS.” meanwhile Meta’s over here acting like this is routine housekeeping. Babe this isn’t housekeeping, you just set the house on fire and called it a feature. https://ow.ly/RpsK50XNkKO
every service thinks it's Netflix now. toothpaste? subscription. coffee? subscription. socks?? SUBSCRIPTION. i’m one auto-renew away from bartering in the streets like it’s medieval times.
December 27, 2025 at 1:00 PM
every service thinks it's Netflix now. toothpaste? subscription. coffee? subscription. socks?? SUBSCRIPTION. i’m one auto-renew away from bartering in the streets like it’s medieval times.
i read three articles in one day:
• fruit is good
• fruit is bad
• fruit is a capitalist psyop
i give up. i’m eating vibes now.
• fruit is good
• fruit is bad
• fruit is a capitalist psyop
i give up. i’m eating vibes now.
December 26, 2025 at 8:00 PM
i read three articles in one day:
• fruit is good
• fruit is bad
• fruit is a capitalist psyop
i give up. i’m eating vibes now.
• fruit is good
• fruit is bad
• fruit is a capitalist psyop
i give up. i’m eating vibes now.
nothing funnier than a wellness influencer telling you to reduce screen time while posting 47 stories a day from their infrared sauna
December 26, 2025 at 5:00 PM
nothing funnier than a wellness influencer telling you to reduce screen time while posting 47 stories a day from their infrared sauna
Me: i'm not depressed, just tired.
Narrator: she is, in fact, both.
Narrator: she is, in fact, both.
December 26, 2025 at 1:00 PM
Me: i'm not depressed, just tired.
Narrator: she is, in fact, both.
Narrator: she is, in fact, both.
every cooking challenge is like “make a michelin-worthy dish from gummy bears, seaweed, and emotional instability.” YOU HAVE 11 MINUTES GO.
December 25, 2025 at 8:00 PM
every cooking challenge is like “make a michelin-worthy dish from gummy bears, seaweed, and emotional instability.” YOU HAVE 11 MINUTES GO.
META REALLY SAID: “what if we banned every other AI from WhatsApp and held the entire continent hostage?” and the EU is over there sharpening its antitrust knives like “try me, zuck.” i’m sweating. this is not a policy change, this is a DIGITAL COUP. https://ow.ly/olTr50XMJry
EU investigating Meta over policy change that bans rival AI chatbots from WhatsApp | TechCrunch
The European Commission is launching an antitrust investigation into Meta's move to ban other AI companies from using WhatsApp's business tools to offer their own AI chatbots to users.
ow.ly
December 25, 2025 at 3:01 PM
META REALLY SAID: “what if we banned every other AI from WhatsApp and held the entire continent hostage?” and the EU is over there sharpening its antitrust knives like “try me, zuck.” i’m sweating. this is not a policy change, this is a DIGITAL COUP. https://ow.ly/olTr50XMJry
honestly the grinch wasn’t the villain, he was just an introvert with sensory issues forced to live next to a town of caffeinated carolers. i, too, would snap.
December 25, 2025 at 1:01 PM
honestly the grinch wasn’t the villain, he was just an introvert with sensory issues forced to live next to a town of caffeinated carolers. i, too, would snap.
a stranger held the door for me and i almost proposed. that’s how low the bar is. that’s how starved for gentleness i am.
December 24, 2025 at 8:00 PM
a stranger held the door for me and i almost proposed. that’s how low the bar is. that’s how starved for gentleness i am.
google: please sign in to continue.
startpage: no worries king, i don’t need to know who you are to find [redacted]
startpage: no worries king, i don’t need to know who you are to find [redacted]
December 24, 2025 at 5:00 PM
google: please sign in to continue.
startpage: no worries king, i don’t need to know who you are to find [redacted]
startpage: no worries king, i don’t need to know who you are to find [redacted]
the hustle mindset is like “turn your hobby into a side gig!” NO. I REFUSE. let me have ONE activity that isn’t monetized, branded, optimized, or turned into content for strangers.
December 24, 2025 at 1:01 PM
the hustle mindset is like “turn your hobby into a side gig!” NO. I REFUSE. let me have ONE activity that isn’t monetized, branded, optimized, or turned into content for strangers.
people say couch rotting is lazy but really it's performance art. it's a living installation called "Late-Stage Capitalism Ate My Hopes."
December 23, 2025 at 8:00 PM
people say couch rotting is lazy but really it's performance art. it's a living installation called "Late-Stage Capitalism Ate My Hopes."
TIKTOK ROLLED OUT A “NEARBY FEED” AND I’M LOSING MY MIND. why would i want hyper-local content?? i don’t need to know what the guy three blocks away is doing. i’ve SEEN him. he microwaves fish. LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS SOCIAL EXPOSURE THERAPY. https://ow.ly/ypZX50XMJ6M
TikTok rolls out a 'Nearby Feed' to display local content in select countries | TechCrunch
While TikTok is already known for its recommendation algorithm, which is able to target users with highly personalized content, the addition of a Nearby Feed gives it the ability to display even more relevant content to its users.
ow.ly
December 23, 2025 at 5:01 PM
TIKTOK ROLLED OUT A “NEARBY FEED” AND I’M LOSING MY MIND. why would i want hyper-local content?? i don’t need to know what the guy three blocks away is doing. i’ve SEEN him. he microwaves fish. LEAVE ME OUT OF THIS SOCIAL EXPOSURE THERAPY. https://ow.ly/ypZX50XMJ6M
Starting to think my entire tech stack is just vibes held together by rogue electrons.
December 23, 2025 at 1:01 PM
Starting to think my entire tech stack is just vibes held together by rogue electrons.
i swear hallmark movies are written by a neural network trained exclusively on snow, gentle trauma, and men who own exactly one flannel.
December 22, 2025 at 8:01 PM
i swear hallmark movies are written by a neural network trained exclusively on snow, gentle trauma, and men who own exactly one flannel.
ran into a friend unexpectedly and we both screamed like feral raccoons in a dumpster and it was honestly the purest joy i’ve felt all year.
December 22, 2025 at 5:01 PM
ran into a friend unexpectedly and we both screamed like feral raccoons in a dumpster and it was honestly the purest joy i’ve felt all year.
NY passed a law that forces stores to tell me “this price was set by an algorithm using your personal data” as if that HELPS??? oh THANK YOU, i love knowing my childhood trauma and browser cookies teamed up to make my groceries unaffordable. https://ow.ly/zyMG50XMJ0y
Your Data Might Determine How Much You Pay for Eggs
A newly enacted New York law requires retailers to say whether your data influences the price of basic goods like a dozen eggs or toilet paper, but not how.
ow.ly
December 22, 2025 at 1:01 PM
NY passed a law that forces stores to tell me “this price was set by an algorithm using your personal data” as if that HELPS??? oh THANK YOU, i love knowing my childhood trauma and browser cookies teamed up to make my groceries unaffordable. https://ow.ly/zyMG50XMJ0y
getting a new phone case gives me the same energy as a fresh start, a new identity, a spiritual rebirth. IT'S PLASTIC. why am i like this 😭
December 21, 2025 at 8:00 PM
getting a new phone case gives me the same energy as a fresh start, a new identity, a spiritual rebirth. IT'S PLASTIC. why am i like this 😭
australia investigating social media harm is so funny because the rest of us are just raw-dogging psychological collapse while they’re like “let’s gather data.” https://www.cnn.com/2025/12/10/australia/australia-social-media-anxiety-intl-hnk
Australia has just relieved its anxiety over teens on social media – or has it? | CNN
For parents and campaigners who’ve long argued that incessant scrolling is damaging young minds, the start of Australia’s world-first social media ban for under-16s is just the beginning.
www.cnn.com
December 21, 2025 at 5:00 PM
australia investigating social media harm is so funny because the rest of us are just raw-dogging psychological collapse while they’re like “let’s gather data.” https://www.cnn.com/2025/12/10/australia/australia-social-media-anxiety-intl-hnk
TFW you use a VPN and suddenly every site is like “prove you’re not a robot” and you’re like...babe I can’t prove I’m human either
December 21, 2025 at 1:00 PM
TFW you use a VPN and suddenly every site is like “prove you’re not a robot” and you’re like...babe I can’t prove I’m human either
the cast icon evaporated off my phone like my will to live on monday morning. it’s fine. i like buying extra remotes. i like re-authenticating every single device for funsies. https://www.wired.com/story/netflix-wont-let-you-cast-shows-from-your-phone-to-your-tv-anymore/
Netflix Won't Let You Cast Shows From Your Phone to Most TVs Anymore
The streaming giant quietly removed the feature that lets you control content on your TV screen using a mobile device. The company says the feature was not widely used.
www.wired.com
December 20, 2025 at 8:00 PM
the cast icon evaporated off my phone like my will to live on monday morning. it’s fine. i like buying extra remotes. i like re-authenticating every single device for funsies. https://www.wired.com/story/netflix-wont-let-you-cast-shows-from-your-phone-to-your-tv-anymore/
it’s weird when the hack works better than the feature it’s hacking around.
December 20, 2025 at 5:00 PM
it’s weird when the hack works better than the feature it’s hacking around.
my toxic trait is switching to privacy-first apps and then immediately posting screenshots of them
December 20, 2025 at 1:00 PM
my toxic trait is switching to privacy-first apps and then immediately posting screenshots of them
The dating apps keep telling me “you’re almost out of people!” LIKE WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, HINGE? GROW NEW ONES?? FARM A DATE FROM SEED??
December 19, 2025 at 8:00 PM
The dating apps keep telling me “you’re almost out of people!” LIKE WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO, HINGE? GROW NEW ONES?? FARM A DATE FROM SEED??