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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker
@theheathyorker.bsky.social
1.6K followers 15 following 600 posts
Parody account swapping captions from Healthcliff and The New Yorker Not affiliated with either cartoon. Tips/donations appreciated but not necessary Cash App: cash.app/$theheathyork
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 10h
10/10/25
Heathcliff Panel: Police dogs sniff around a tree where Heathcliff and Pops are hiding. Two birds are watching. One of them says "Look what they've done to your creation." New Yorker Panel: An angel stands before God holding a jack-o-lantern and says "I should do more things with my dad."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 1d
10/9/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff leads slugs in a march down the sidewalk. Two owls watch in a tree, one owl says "Phone, keys, wallet." New Yorker Panel: Several geese stand near the water. One goose lifts it's wings and looks at its feathers saying "It's slug weather."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 2d
10/8/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff lounges on a pile of catnip. Above him the moon has taken the shape of Heathcliff's face wearing sunglasses. Two owls watch from a tree, one of them says "I was going to freak out about this but I think I'll wait until tomorrow, when a new global debacle will have taken place." New Yorker Panel: A couple sits on a couch, the man puts his hand on his forehead and says "It's a catnip harvest moon."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 3d
10/7/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff and Spike walk down the sidewalk wearing yes and no helmets respectively. They are set to collide at the corner. Two birds watch one bird says "Some people say sports betting has gone too far, but I like the on-field bookie." New Yorker Panel: A bookie stands behind the pitcher at a baseball game. One player in the bullpen says "Hold on to your butt."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 4d
10/6/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff and Grandma Nutmeg look out the window while the cursing cactus sits on the sill cursing. Grandma Nutmeg says "We're being deployed because of the protests about us being deployed." New Yorker Panel: National Guard troops are being briefed on Operation Circular Reasoning. The officer says "The cactus resents the fall foliage."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 7d
10/3/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff walks passed the fish market wearing fish bones on a chain around his neck. One of the employees says "When you travel back in time, remember not to do anything that may alter things in the present- you know what? Never mind. Go for it." New Yorker Panel: Two scientists stand in front of a swirling portal. One of them says "I want one of those."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 8d
10/2/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff is teaching a bro fish how to bro. The Nutmegs watch on, Iggy says "No decorative gourds in the soup!" New Yorker Panel: Several gourds are sitting in a soup bowl looking at a bump decorative gourd that is standing outside of the bowl. One of the gourds in the bowl says "Practice makes perfect."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 9d
10/1/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff is dressed as a wizard using magic to make a textbook, paper, and a pencil float. Iggy looks on proudly as Grandpa Nutmeg describes Independence Day from the other room "...and then Randy Quaid yells, 'Hello, boys, I'm back!,' and flies his jet right into the alien ship, blowing it up, and I think you all just need to be more like that." New Yorker Panel: Pete Hegseth stands on stage in front of generals and says "He better not be doing your homework."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 10d
9/30/25
Heathcliff Panel: A huge milk fountain has been built in the front yard. Heathcliff looks proudly out of the window. Grandma Nutmeg stands behind him and says "So, with this shutdown, can we get an exit-through-the-gift-shop thing going?" New Yorker Panel: Trump sits in The Oval Office with two advisors. He says "I hate it."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 10d
9/29/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff stands outside the house having put Bro helmets on several garden gnomes. A neighbor sees and says "Today I announce the deployment of troops to the home of a man who called me a mean name seventy years ago." New Yorker Panel: Trump stands at a podium showing a satellite image of Doug's house. He says "Bro gnomes."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 10d
9/25/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff and his bro cats walk down the sidewalk wearing Bro helmets. Two birds sit in a tree, one of them says "Apparently, life wasn't hard enough, so now humans wear weighted vests to ruin their pleasant evening strolls." New Yorker Panel: Aliens watch humans walking around in weighted vests. One of them says "We should get helmets, bro."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 15d
9/25/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff and a giraffe walk out of the gym. An employee says "Tonight's top story: No news is good news." New Yorker Panel: A couple watches the news on TV. The anchor says "neck day."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 15d
9/24/25
Heathcliff Panel: Jimmy Cool poses in front of a new billboard for his James Cool Cologne. Iggy and Heathcliff stand on the sidewalk. Iggy says "What a great view of everything I'm allergic to." New Yorker Panel: A couple stands looking at a field. The woman says "How are sales."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 17d
9/23/25
Heathcliff Panel: Two dog catchers talk in front of city hall. Heathcliff stands nearby scowling and holding a briefcase and blueprints. One dog catcher says "I'm so disgusted with people who aren't speaking up right now! But they better have flawlessly curated statements when they do- unless they're ignorant on the issues, in which they better educate themselves- but also they're too late." New Yorker Panel: A man sitting in a diner pounds the table and says to a woman across from him "They rejected his gargoyles on the dog pound."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 17d
9/22/25
Heathcliff Panel: A squirrel stands in front of a pile of acorns holding a sign that reads 'deez nuts'. Two other squirrels see Heathcliff mid-pounce. One of the witnessing squirrels says "Out Oktoberfest beer is the same as our summer ale, except I'm serving it while wearing lederhosen." New Yorker Panel: A bartender serves a mug of beer and says "Never brag about your stash."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 20d
I don’t know how long @atnathanyaffe.bsky.social has followed me here but he is the one who said the words that made me realize that Heathcliff and New Yorker cartoons have essentially the same format. So if anyone asks he did this.
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 21d
9/19/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff leaves the tailor with a new pink cape that says 'meat.' A man says to the tailor "Wages are down, prices are up, and terror and uncertainty plague the streets, but our top story- why aren't women having more babies?" New Yorker Panel: A couple watches the news. The anchor simply says "fire."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 22d
9/18/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff floats away using bubblegum leaving Sonja behind at the gum store. A gum store employee says "Applause or else." New Yorker Panel: Trump stands in front of an audience and points upwards to a sign that reads "He was born under a wandering star."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 23d
9/17/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff stares at a caged bird. The bird says "Believe me, I get it- it's hard waiting to become king." New Yorker Panel: King Charles walks with President Trump. Charles says "Stop sautéing me with your eyes."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 24d
9/16/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff drives a wagon pulled by a bull through the street. The wagon is holding mice behind bars. A couple watch from their yard. The woman says "And the award for Longest Wait Time Between Seasons goes to..." New Yorker Panel: A couple is watching the Emmys. The host on tv says "The exterminator came highly recommended."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 25d
9/15/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff is being scolded by Sonja. He is wearing a shirt with a B on it. His bro cats wearing shirts with R, O, and S wait for him. Two birds watch from a tree. One of the birds says "Sorry, ma'am, the museum recently learned that the painting hanging here wasn't art." New Yorker Panel: A woman looks at a blank spot on the wall of a museum. An employee explains "This is common with bros."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 28d
9/12/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff walks down the sidewalk an angel and devil over his shoulders fight. Two birds watch. One of them says "It's always great to get the old crew together, fire up the grill, crack open some cold ones, and remember that if we met today we wouldn't be friends." New Yorker Panel: Men gather around a grill with beers. One of them says "The battle rages on."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · 29d
9/11/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff is showing a hand puppet of himself to a visitor. The visitor calls out to Grandpa Nutmeg and Iggy saying "Some of you will receive a placebo, and the rest of you will also receive a placebo, thanks to new C.D.C guidance." New Yorker Panel: A doctor addresses a room full of people. The doctor says "Your cat's puppet is making me nervous."
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · Sep 10
9/10/25
Heathcliff Panel: Jimmy stands in front of his new Jimmy Cool Life Coach storefront. Iggy and a depressed looking Heathcliff watch from across the street. Iggy asks Heathcliff "What's your App Store password? I want to play Fortnite." New Yorker Panel: A monster holding a phone talks to a boy at the back of a classroom. The monster asks "how's business?"
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theheathyorker.bsky.social
The Heathyorker @theheathyorker.bsky.social · Sep 9
9/9/25
Heathcliff Panel: Heathcliff sits in a large chair wearing a bro helmet. In front him many bro fish say bro. Grandma Nutmeg says to her friend "Every time he opens his mouth I lose a hundred friends." New Yorker Panel: A whale sucks a school of fish into its mouth. Two fish watch from afar, one of them says "He comes here to think."
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