Author | Lightnews

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Sep 11

What a conflicting day for a progressive person with empathy.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Sep 7

Congrats Alcaraz. Dont let trump near your trophy. #usopen

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Sep 5

Dak spat first. #freejalencater #nfl #TNF #cowboys #eagles #dakprescott #Jalencater #kickoff

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TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Sep 3

👀

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Aug 31

This administration ABSOLUTELY would hide his death for a couple of weeks and have a body double play the role; But plot twist, that guy’s actually really nice, does some good things, and accidentally saves the country. Yes, thats the plot to the 1993 film ‘Dave,’ but also…. #whereistrump

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TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Aug 28

Maybe feels a little too on the nose to find a discarded constitution for sale at the neighborhood Salvation Army.

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TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Aug 21

Is there a name for the introverts who end up in management positions and then after facilitating a meeting, before you send off the follow up emails, you have to go in the other room and give yourself a little snaky snack?

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Aug 12

My sister and her kids came to visit this past weekend. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a vasectomy to catch.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Jul 8

I don’t deal with aggressive quips from people I don’t know for less than $75 an hour.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Jun 27

I’m really loving this new leaf on our monstera plant. It’s so good it’s been distracting me from the absolute dystopia we’ve been marinating in lately.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Jun 5

Alright. Elon says trump wouldn’t have won the election without him. Elon, just tell us how you did it. Just say it.

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TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Jun 3

A classic airport breakfast at 9:54a, brought to you by “our breakfast menu ended at 9:30.”
#CLTairport

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · May 27

People without depression and anxiety are wild. My wife still can’t fathom how I can just sigh for no specific reason.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · May 19

I probably just thought way too hard about what socks I was going to wear, knowing I would later be going into the power tools section at Lowe’s.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · May 9

I can’t wait for #PopeLeo to introduce #malort to all of cardinals at the Vatican.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · May 5

I can’t wait for The Phoenician Scheme to come out and see what kind of national security threats Wes Anderson has been up to.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · May 4

I think my favorite cameo appearance in the new #marvel movie #thunderbolts is the CC Rentals truck. A true hero of NYC.

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TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · May 4

Just saw the #thunderbolts movie. Congrats to the cast, especially #julialouisdreyfus in her accurate portrayal as the evil Tulsi Gabbard.

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TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Apr 13

Dear companies that are not backing down from your commitment to DEI, I have two things:
1: Thank you.
2: please iron or steam your pride flag.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Apr 11

#malort #tasteofchicago

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Apr 3

Happy 160th anniversary of the fall of the confederate capitol. Don’t forget, your battle flags are from a defunct 165-year-old government that was established in the name of slavery, and waving them means nothing more than racism these days. Sic semper tyrannis.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Mar 29

A few shots along the Tidal Basin in DC yesterday. The cherry blossoms are in full bloom this weekend! #photography #cherryblosssom #cherrlyblossomfestival #washingtonDC

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TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Mar 29

CTRL+ALT+DEL feels like putting a pillow over your computer while quietly saying “Shhh.”

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Mar 28

I’m at a restaurant in Washington DC. I wonder how many conversations about lawsuits are going on around me.

TheTonyCrawford @thetonycrawford.bsky.social · Mar 28

I’m in Washington DC this week and every 20th person I pass in this town looks like they’re cosplaying as Bradley Whitford.