Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Joe Colacrai

@ageofuprising.bsky.social

6.6K followers 19K following 2.9K posts

Walt Disney Imagineer, Singer/Songwriter, Aspiring Author

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Pinned

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · Nov 27

Hello, new followers!

I'm Joe. I'm a mechanical designer for Disney and an aspiring author.

The book series I'm working on is called "Age of Uprising."

In my spare time I'm a singer/songwriter/guitarist.

In my past life I pursued the visual arts, sculpting, costuming, etc.

Nice to meet you all!

20 28 260

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 8m

"I tell it like it is!"
"Um, it's 2025 and I'm exhausted. Can you lie to me instead?"

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3h

The Dialogue Yak is usually so vocal. 😉

1 1

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3h

The Plot Bison wants you to know your plot is coming along nicely. Keep plotting!

1 12

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 12h

ICE are unAmerican. May they all be identified, named, and shamed, and may they never know peace. No service at restaurants. No going to a game. No partaking in commerce of any kind. Die alone, you fucking losers.

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 1d

Shouldn't a video game console, I dunno...console you?

1 2

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 1d

"Swamp Thing" – starring Pam Bondi

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 1d

What I wouldn't give for one well-timed "Nobody believes you." Or a simple, "That's what you're gonna go with? Hahaha."
I'd make a great reporter.

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 1d

When I was younger, I used to fantasize about Kate Beckinsale in her "Underworld" costume. Now, my fantasies have taken a different shape. I fantasize about anybody being held accountable for literally anything. I feel like the former was a more attainable dream too.

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 1d

"Tiny spritz"

a young boy is riding a scooter in a grassy field .

Alt: a young boy shoots himself in the face with water.

media.tenor.com

1 1

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 1d

I imagine a ton of journalists have written very good pieces about what's happening out there, but their editors come in at the last minute like, "Okay, but can you change the headline to make fascism sound more edgy and cool?"

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 2d

Honestly, the news could just say Burbank's still being Burbank, and we'd all just nod and say that tracks.

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 2d

People really lie like they breathe now, don't they? My working theory is, when we stopped making cartoons depicting an angel over one shoulder and a devil over the other, people stopped feeling bad about lying. Those dumb cartoons were more important than anyone thought!

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 2d

Keep grinding it out, and remember: your reward is an early grave. 💀

1 6

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 2d

One of those interactive firing ranges where you get points for shooting criminals and lose points for shooting civilians, except you're an ICE agent and you have to deport only undocumented people. But, the joke's on you, they're all American citizens. And you? You got the low score, numb-nuts.

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 2d

I dunno. Guys like him think being called "psychotic" is some kind of weird compliment. What he is is a fucking loser. Y'know, like what everybody called him in high school: fucking complete and total LOSER.

1 3

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 2d

Please join us in welcoming Ted Bundy to the CBS family. Ted will be focusing on missing persons. He'll join the other Ted, Ted Kaczynski, who's in charge of public safety, for our nightly news broadcast.

2 5

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

Man, with all these "emergencies" in so many US cities, it must be threatening to our closest neighbors. I wouldn't be shocked to see Mexican and Canadian troops sent here to help. In fact, I think they should. We obviously can't handle ourselves.

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

Seems like a great time to preempt all local television, get on the news, and describe in detail for hours and hours on end how Trump is in the Epstein files. As long as they're deployed in your city, don't stop.

3 26

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

Based on what I've seen on various social media sites, going forward, I'm going to take it as a given that, if somebody's running a book event, it's probably a scam. 🤷

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

Who?

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

A Captcha, but it's photos of ICE, and you have to pick out every picture that contains a piece of shit.

1 9

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

I believe that, based on state law, businesses should absolutely be able to refuse service to ICE agents. Disruptive behavior, safety concerns for other customers—there's any number of ways to articulate it. Sure, you can be in the streets, but good luck getting food, lodging, public restrooms, etc.

1 7

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

They'll want welfare, but they won't call it welfare. They'll want socialism, but they won't call it that either. "Freedom Bucks for Patriots" or something similar.

1 4

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 3d

Reading through one of my chapters and not finding very much to edit. Either my writing's getting better or I've lost all discernment. 😆

1 4

Joe Colacrai @ageofuprising.bsky.social · 4d

I'm halfway through drafting my book!
Or, a third of the way...
Or, somewhere in-between...
Or...oh hell, I dunno. 😄