cy(ia)n
@ahumancuttingboard.bsky.social
alt account for me to just kinda say whatever's on my mind
so this is gonna be mainly venting, most likely
so this is gonna be mainly venting, most likely
Pinned
most of the posts here will only be able to be replied to if i know you
if i know you and im just stupid, dm me and i'll follow ya
if i know you and im just stupid, dm me and i'll follow ya
im never gonna amount to anything
January 27, 2026 at 4:37 PM
im never gonna amount to anything
wow.22days isnt thatsuchagoodstreaktoobadihadtoruinitallagain
January 27, 2026 at 3:50 AM
wow.22days isnt thatsuchagoodstreaktoobadihadtoruinitallagain
hhaven t cut myself in 17 days!!!
January 20, 2026 at 9:52 PM
hhaven t cut myself in 17 days!!!
i tthink im just being paranoid,,,but its stilll reallly scary to think about,,,,i love her so much,,like,, more than ive loved anyone before,,,,i really dont want to lose mono :<
i ddont think mono would leave me
bbut im scared that im wrong
especially cconsidering hhow often i fuck uup
bbut im scared that im wrong
especially cconsidering hhow often i fuck uup
January 10, 2026 at 7:16 AM
i tthink im just being paranoid,,,but its stilll reallly scary to think about,,,,i love her so much,,like,, more than ive loved anyone before,,,,i really dont want to lose mono :<
i ddont think mono would leave me
bbut im scared that im wrong
especially cconsidering hhow often i fuck uup
bbut im scared that im wrong
especially cconsidering hhow often i fuck uup
January 10, 2026 at 7:06 AM
i ddont think mono would leave me
bbut im scared that im wrong
especially cconsidering hhow often i fuck uup
bbut im scared that im wrong
especially cconsidering hhow often i fuck uup
Reposted by cy(ia)n
THEYʾLL FORGET YOU!!!!!!
January 10, 2026 at 6:52 AM
THEYʾLL FORGET YOU!!!!!!
i ccan tell im really clingy because when im with her i feel ggreat, llike i ccould do anything. bbut when shes gone i feel bbad and wwant to kill myself aggain
January 10, 2026 at 6:24 AM
i ccan tell im really clingy because when im with her i feel ggreat, llike i ccould do anything. bbut when shes gone i feel bbad and wwant to kill myself aggain
of course, i can lose all this extra weight if i just dont eat ever ^^ why didnt i think of that before
January 8, 2026 at 3:12 AM
of course, i can lose all this extra weight if i just dont eat ever ^^ why didnt i think of that before
i havent thought about killing myself since last year!! haha..ha..ha...
January 8, 2026 at 1:47 AM
i havent thought about killing myself since last year!! haha..ha..ha...
btw nothing towards any of you if you dm me about a post i made and i dont respond. i mostlikely just cant think of anything to say or was just very anxious or something
December 31, 2025 at 7:09 AM
btw nothing towards any of you if you dm me about a post i made and i dont respond. i mostlikely just cant think of anything to say or was just very anxious or something
im sso conffused :< i ddont know whats happening anymoreee :<
December 31, 2025 at 4:46 AM
im sso conffused :< i ddont know whats happening anymoreee :<
lowkey wish i could be better for you. maybe bleeding out would make me better
December 30, 2025 at 9:07 AM
lowkey wish i could be better for you. maybe bleeding out would make me better
i wish i had something that could cut deeper..like a razor blade or soamething
December 30, 2025 at 8:37 AM
i wish i had something that could cut deeper..like a razor blade or soamething
the antidepressants arent doing anything ive been taking them for weeks i feel like i should be feeling better but no i still want to kill myself
December 30, 2025 at 8:17 AM
the antidepressants arent doing anything ive been taking them for weeks i feel like i should be feeling better but no i still want to kill myself
im sorry im insufferable i dont always try to be
also, contrary to what you may think based off what i post here, i dont always want to kill myself (sorry to dissapoint)
also, contrary to what you may think based off what i post here, i dont always want to kill myself (sorry to dissapoint)
December 30, 2025 at 7:40 AM
im sorry im insufferable i dont always try to be
also, contrary to what you may think based off what i post here, i dont always want to kill myself (sorry to dissapoint)
also, contrary to what you may think based off what i post here, i dont always want to kill myself (sorry to dissapoint)
sorry i havent killed myself yet im working on it dw
December 30, 2025 at 6:46 AM
sorry i havent killed myself yet im working on it dw
sorry i apologize so much, i know sorry gets stale after a while
December 29, 2025 at 6:02 PM
sorry i apologize so much, i know sorry gets stale after a while
sorry i cant be better for you :<
December 29, 2025 at 5:42 PM
sorry i cant be better for you :<
im so sorry to anyone who considers me a friend for having such a shitty friend who cannot improve
please do not consider me as a friend for your sake
please do not consider me as a friend for your sake
December 25, 2025 at 6:49 AM
im so sorry to anyone who considers me a friend for having such a shitty friend who cannot improve
please do not consider me as a friend for your sake
please do not consider me as a friend for your sake
im so fucking pathetic ONE week before relapsing im so sorry
December 25, 2025 at 6:28 AM
im so fucking pathetic ONE week before relapsing im so sorry
i *really* want to cut myself rn it feels like an addiction and i dont know why i just really want to do it
December 25, 2025 at 6:13 AM
i *really* want to cut myself rn it feels like an addiction and i dont know why i just really want to do it
i post this mainly because i have...i guess i cant really call it 'trauma' that doesnt fit it...but that was what my previous partner did for MONTHS and i have major trust issues now
so please for both of our sakes just tell me
so please for both of our sakes just tell me
ppplease tell me if i annoy you or upset you in any way :< i dont want you to pretend that you do still enjoy me if you dont.
this isnt really a vent but i thought it'd be best to post this here
this isnt really a vent but i thought it'd be best to post this here
December 25, 2025 at 4:10 AM
i post this mainly because i have...i guess i cant really call it 'trauma' that doesnt fit it...but that was what my previous partner did for MONTHS and i have major trust issues now
so please for both of our sakes just tell me
so please for both of our sakes just tell me
ppplease tell me if i annoy you or upset you in any way :< i dont want you to pretend that you do still enjoy me if you dont.
this isnt really a vent but i thought it'd be best to post this here
this isnt really a vent but i thought it'd be best to post this here
December 25, 2025 at 4:06 AM
ppplease tell me if i annoy you or upset you in any way :< i dont want you to pretend that you do still enjoy me if you dont.
this isnt really a vent but i thought it'd be best to post this here
this isnt really a vent but i thought it'd be best to post this here