@alderetemary.bsky.social
Life: “How depressed do you feel?”
Me: “All I have energy to do is watch porn. But I don’t have the energy to surf online for it.”
Me: “All I have energy to do is watch porn. But I don’t have the energy to surf online for it.”
December 29, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Life: “How depressed do you feel?”
Me: “All I have energy to do is watch porn. But I don’t have the energy to surf online for it.”
Me: “All I have energy to do is watch porn. But I don’t have the energy to surf online for it.”
I wonder if Murdock from the A-Team was really insane or was simply good at acting insane?
December 4, 2025 at 5:14 PM
I wonder if Murdock from the A-Team was really insane or was simply good at acting insane?
The theme song to National Lampoon’s Vacation Holiday Road really slaps
November 27, 2025 at 3:32 AM
The theme song to National Lampoon’s Vacation Holiday Road really slaps
I was today years old when I learned there was a real Fanny Brice on Broadway.
November 21, 2025 at 4:41 PM
I was today years old when I learned there was a real Fanny Brice on Broadway.
I am in a cafe, and a man brought in lots of milk gallons, rolling them stacked in a trolley. I saw him and sang, “La vaca. Moo. La vaca. Moo.” And he laughed so hard he almost knocked over the milk gallons.
November 17, 2025 at 5:21 PM
I am in a cafe, and a man brought in lots of milk gallons, rolling them stacked in a trolley. I saw him and sang, “La vaca. Moo. La vaca. Moo.” And he laughed so hard he almost knocked over the milk gallons.
There is a big difference between these pens. The green one makes me happy to write. It is my favorite pen. The other is too sleek to the touch, and while writing I cannot help but feel it will fly off my hand as if gravity has no effect for it.
November 11, 2025 at 6:17 PM
There is a big difference between these pens. The green one makes me happy to write. It is my favorite pen. The other is too sleek to the touch, and while writing I cannot help but feel it will fly off my hand as if gravity has no effect for it.
My thanks goes out to the adorable 6th-grader who uploaded a YouTube lesson showing how to put a narration video in a PowerPoint presentation.
November 9, 2025 at 5:56 PM
My thanks goes out to the adorable 6th-grader who uploaded a YouTube lesson showing how to put a narration video in a PowerPoint presentation.
Taking my dad to the cardiologist for a check-up.
ME: “Look, Pops. It’s The Heart Institute. Let’s see if they have one for you.”
POPS: “Smart-ass.”
NURSE: (laughs)
ME: “Look, Pops. It’s The Heart Institute. Let’s see if they have one for you.”
POPS: “Smart-ass.”
NURSE: (laughs)
October 22, 2025 at 7:53 PM
Taking my dad to the cardiologist for a check-up.
ME: “Look, Pops. It’s The Heart Institute. Let’s see if they have one for you.”
POPS: “Smart-ass.”
NURSE: (laughs)
ME: “Look, Pops. It’s The Heart Institute. Let’s see if they have one for you.”
POPS: “Smart-ass.”
NURSE: (laughs)
Nobody at this coffee shop gets my humor.
October 20, 2025 at 3:25 PM
Nobody at this coffee shop gets my humor.
Ah, my trusty depression lamp. Defend my brain during these gloomy, dark months!
October 19, 2025 at 12:32 AM
Ah, my trusty depression lamp. Defend my brain during these gloomy, dark months!
Every time I listen to the song Come With Me Now by KONGOS, I imagine people performing kick-ass tap dancing.
October 8, 2025 at 11:33 PM
Every time I listen to the song Come With Me Now by KONGOS, I imagine people performing kick-ass tap dancing.
Marjorie Taylor Greene must have been visited by three ghosts.
October 8, 2025 at 12:12 AM
Marjorie Taylor Greene must have been visited by three ghosts.
Who benefits from Hegseth’s decision to continue to honor the Wounded Knee massacre soldiers? Perhaps if their medals are revoked, it means the U.S. government will be forced to make reparations for all subsequent injustices? And perhaps the Trump administration doesn’t want that?
October 1, 2025 at 11:48 PM
Who benefits from Hegseth’s decision to continue to honor the Wounded Knee massacre soldiers? Perhaps if their medals are revoked, it means the U.S. government will be forced to make reparations for all subsequent injustices? And perhaps the Trump administration doesn’t want that?
Happiness is finally figuring out and writing the outline for the manuscript
September 29, 2025 at 11:07 PM
Happiness is finally figuring out and writing the outline for the manuscript
People who join ICE, people who call ICE, people who approve of ICE: what are you doing?! What are you doing?! What are you doing?!
September 26, 2025 at 9:23 PM
People who join ICE, people who call ICE, people who approve of ICE: what are you doing?! What are you doing?! What are you doing?!
What if the people taken up for the Rapture are the ones that will be eaten?
September 23, 2025 at 11:33 PM
What if the people taken up for the Rapture are the ones that will be eaten?
Stimming in the kitchen. But now I am an adult so nobody can make me stop. Haha.
September 23, 2025 at 12:42 AM
Stimming in the kitchen. But now I am an adult so nobody can make me stop. Haha.
Surprise! Menopause includes excruciating pain in my heels. How fun.
September 15, 2025 at 9:23 PM
Surprise! Menopause includes excruciating pain in my heels. How fun.
“Without bystanders, perpetrators would not have been able to commit the worst crime in human history.”
.
I am reading The Crime of Complicity: The Bystander in the Holocaust, by Amos N. Guiora.
.
I am reading The Crime of Complicity: The Bystander in the Holocaust, by Amos N. Guiora.
September 9, 2025 at 7:24 PM
“Without bystanders, perpetrators would not have been able to commit the worst crime in human history.”
.
I am reading The Crime of Complicity: The Bystander in the Holocaust, by Amos N. Guiora.
.
I am reading The Crime of Complicity: The Bystander in the Holocaust, by Amos N. Guiora.
MAGA singles are hosting “Good Genes” get-togethers in order to find love. Um, okay? Do they show up with their 23&Me reports?
September 9, 2025 at 5:07 PM
MAGA singles are hosting “Good Genes” get-togethers in order to find love. Um, okay? Do they show up with their 23&Me reports?
Supreme Court Ruling - well, big surprise
September 9, 2025 at 12:01 AM
Supreme Court Ruling - well, big surprise
Today’s STRANDS was tricky.
September 6, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Today’s STRANDS was tricky.
Saw the Senate grilling RFK, Jr. and making him stutter and shake in his seat…or was that withdrawal?
September 4, 2025 at 6:18 PM
Saw the Senate grilling RFK, Jr. and making him stutter and shake in his seat…or was that withdrawal?
Oh, come on, we know it can’t be really Luigi Mangione modeling for SHEIN, because we all know he’s WAY MORE BUFF than that body in the ad.
September 4, 2025 at 6:17 PM
Oh, come on, we know it can’t be really Luigi Mangione modeling for SHEIN, because we all know he’s WAY MORE BUFF than that body in the ad.
Why do I need a mammogram? I could have sworn I was 16-years-old just yesterday
September 4, 2025 at 4:33 PM
Why do I need a mammogram? I could have sworn I was 16-years-old just yesterday