Puns need to be Christmas-cracker bad and scrambling is too straight. Something like 'Police Chief says Om-letting my crack team handle this'

government public messaging always included at least one bus stop ad on our Minister's route into the city

With my business is not just the boss: my business support, IT manager and CFO, they're hopeless

when my 85 yo mum has any IT issue I have NFI and refer to my 25 yo daughter. I've no doubt that she and her younger brother could take over the house wifi maybe they already have, and that's ok so long as we still get access

Small knot. Always aim for Cillian Murphy in Oppenheimer

Nuts that terrible Oz design standards are still placing the costs of higher bills / future upgrades on home owners. It's not $30k when you're building the house

Every single stat says we're going to lose against the worst non-relegated team in the league

There's an Australian term "a dingo breakfast", meaning, excuse the language, 'a shit and a look around' i.e. no breakfast

I lived in Cumbria during foot and mouth. More jolting than the killing of all the sheep and cows, was their complete reappearance 12 months later. Hang on, those field are full of new animals every year?

I think it was Dave Woodhall who recounted the tale of the Paul McGrath ticketed gala evening shortly after his retirement, with two tables of Villa supporters and one ManU.

About 4 years ago my son, annoyingly selective about my vinyl collection that includes Come on Pilgrim and Dry, came back from the pub having seen Amyl and the Sniffers, and they're now an essential. All is forgiven mate.

*Cranker Adelaide best music pub in the southern hemisphere

"One size fits all" I don't think so

South Australia has 70% intermittent renewable energy yet has way more expensive retail energy than Victoria. How can this be.

SA (199 kgCO2e/MWh):
Solar 29% $25 /MWh
Wind 43% $68
Gas 23% $238

VIC (670 kgCO2e/MWh):
Coal 62% $98
Gas 2% $249

(Source: openelectricity.org.au NEM last 12 months)

Missed seeing you 1992 in Carlisle when it was cancelled, first opportunity since then

The odd thing is them ignoring the data: listed companies with more women on the board and in management positions have better performance, on average. But also, yes

I'm imagining our Shepherd Maisie and Cocker Spaniel Fennel realising they are sucking in the same piece of spaghetti. Short under-the-breath growl from Maisie and Fennel drops the spaghetti

True, but only because you've had less time to be worse