Barbara Leigh
@barbaraleighauthor.bsky.social
Author of "Why Smart Girls Get Into Bad Relationships and How Not To Do It Again" and writer of the Helpfulmess blog. Gently trying to help people live better lives with less fear and more creativity. barbaraleighauthor.com
When you participate in the sharing of stories, you are creating a relationship. People see how you handle their stories. Trust and future interactions are based on how that feels. Handle with care.
#helpfulmess #HandleWithCare #stories #relationships
#helpfulmess #HandleWithCare #stories #relationships
November 12, 2025 at 10:33 PM
When you participate in the sharing of stories, you are creating a relationship. People see how you handle their stories. Trust and future interactions are based on how that feels. Handle with care.
#helpfulmess #HandleWithCare #stories #relationships
#helpfulmess #HandleWithCare #stories #relationships
Hope takes the momentum of the small wins and uses it to fuel action for good. Turns out, action is a great way to accomplish good. Hope drives your future; where do you want to go?
#helpfulmess #hope #TakeAction
#helpfulmess #hope #TakeAction
November 5, 2025 at 7:29 PM
Hope takes the momentum of the small wins and uses it to fuel action for good. Turns out, action is a great way to accomplish good. Hope drives your future; where do you want to go?
#helpfulmess #hope #TakeAction
#helpfulmess #hope #TakeAction
We all experience things that add bricks to our walls. You control your wall. Allowing yourself to explore the whys and what ifs specific to your wall gives you an opportunity to adjust and open yourself up to better relationships. People need people!
#helpfulmess #KeepOut #OpenUp #BeBrave
#helpfulmess #KeepOut #OpenUp #BeBrave
October 30, 2025 at 2:47 PM
We all experience things that add bricks to our walls. You control your wall. Allowing yourself to explore the whys and what ifs specific to your wall gives you an opportunity to adjust and open yourself up to better relationships. People need people!
#helpfulmess #KeepOut #OpenUp #BeBrave
#helpfulmess #KeepOut #OpenUp #BeBrave
We are told to rebalance our investment portfolios to stick to our financial plan. In that same way, remember to think about the delicate balance of those other tradeoffs in your life and make sure the way they are weighted still serves you.
#helpfulmess #rebalance #priorities #tradeoffs
#helpfulmess #rebalance #priorities #tradeoffs
October 23, 2025 at 3:01 AM
We are told to rebalance our investment portfolios to stick to our financial plan. In that same way, remember to think about the delicate balance of those other tradeoffs in your life and make sure the way they are weighted still serves you.
#helpfulmess #rebalance #priorities #tradeoffs
#helpfulmess #rebalance #priorities #tradeoffs
The number of things you can care about is directly related to the amount of money and time you have. The more people that can only care about their own circle, the less people there are to fix the bigger problems of the world. Throw the life ring when you can.
#helpfulmess #Overwhelmed
#helpfulmess #Overwhelmed
October 15, 2025 at 3:38 PM
The number of things you can care about is directly related to the amount of money and time you have. The more people that can only care about their own circle, the less people there are to fix the bigger problems of the world. Throw the life ring when you can.
#helpfulmess #Overwhelmed
#helpfulmess #Overwhelmed
Daisy loves to go outside, until she’s outside. Sometimes she gets brave and goes to the flower bed but then hides. Is your life like that? You see something that looks wonderful, but you’re afraid to go there, or hide once you’re there? Let yourself shine!
barbaraleighauthor.com/blog/f/scare...
barbaraleighauthor.com/blog/f/scare...
October 8, 2025 at 4:51 PM
Daisy loves to go outside, until she’s outside. Sometimes she gets brave and goes to the flower bed but then hides. Is your life like that? You see something that looks wonderful, but you’re afraid to go there, or hide once you’re there? Let yourself shine!
barbaraleighauthor.com/blog/f/scare...
barbaraleighauthor.com/blog/f/scare...
Unlike the leaf, you have the power of choice. You can change the way you spend your life. You can let go of fear and drive out the bugs that are dragging you down. You can decide to live.
#helpfulmess #LoveYourLife #leaf #ChooseToLive
#helpfulmess #LoveYourLife #leaf #ChooseToLive
October 2, 2025 at 12:26 AM
Unlike the leaf, you have the power of choice. You can change the way you spend your life. You can let go of fear and drive out the bugs that are dragging you down. You can decide to live.
#helpfulmess #LoveYourLife #leaf #ChooseToLive
#helpfulmess #LoveYourLife #leaf #ChooseToLive
Just as not everyone sees the beauty in a gourd, you’ll run into people who don’t see your beauty. Some people will try to hollow you out to make you useful to them. You don’t need to prove yourself to anyone. You are a delight.
#helpfulmess #gourds #IAmADelight #HappyFall
#helpfulmess #gourds #IAmADelight #HappyFall
September 23, 2025 at 11:47 PM
Just as not everyone sees the beauty in a gourd, you’ll run into people who don’t see your beauty. Some people will try to hollow you out to make you useful to them. You don’t need to prove yourself to anyone. You are a delight.
#helpfulmess #gourds #IAmADelight #HappyFall
#helpfulmess #gourds #IAmADelight #HappyFall
If the latest item in the news cycle feels like too much, it’s okay to move past and keep going. If your relationships hinge on how you feel about one news item, it might be time to invest more into your relationships and less into current events.
#helpfulmess
#helpfulmess
September 17, 2025 at 3:46 PM
If the latest item in the news cycle feels like too much, it’s okay to move past and keep going. If your relationships hinge on how you feel about one news item, it might be time to invest more into your relationships and less into current events.
#helpfulmess
#helpfulmess
Does anyone grieve the coneflowers? Allowing yourself to grieve your life events allows you to move forward with less stress and also gives you practice for the big things like death. Grief acknowledges change and gives it space.
September 10, 2025 at 9:46 PM
Does anyone grieve the coneflowers? Allowing yourself to grieve your life events allows you to move forward with less stress and also gives you practice for the big things like death. Grief acknowledges change and gives it space.
When your goal is clear, you tend to choose the fastest route to get there. It’s okay to recalibrate or change your goal based on new information. Just remember to adjust the rest of your map accordingly. Then, carry on!
#helpfulmess #LessIsMore #CarryOn #Goals
#helpfulmess #LessIsMore #CarryOn #Goals
September 2, 2025 at 4:34 PM
When your goal is clear, you tend to choose the fastest route to get there. It’s okay to recalibrate or change your goal based on new information. Just remember to adjust the rest of your map accordingly. Then, carry on!
#helpfulmess #LessIsMore #CarryOn #Goals
#helpfulmess #LessIsMore #CarryOn #Goals
When told to visualize your happy place, I go with visualizing a calm space where I can picture feeling love, laughter, and contentment. Basically, it looks like this cat living his best life.
#helpfulmess #happyCat #LiveYourBestLife #Relax
#helpfulmess #happyCat #LiveYourBestLife #Relax
August 28, 2025 at 3:33 AM
When told to visualize your happy place, I go with visualizing a calm space where I can picture feeling love, laughter, and contentment. Basically, it looks like this cat living his best life.
#helpfulmess #happyCat #LiveYourBestLife #Relax
#helpfulmess #happyCat #LiveYourBestLife #Relax
Like these flowers, beauty comes when we can let go of the bugs and the weeds and focus on the blooms.
August 20, 2025 at 8:42 PM
Like these flowers, beauty comes when we can let go of the bugs and the weeds and focus on the blooms.
If it makes you mad, you are less likely to see ulterior motives, and more likely to join in the screaming. Anger takes action. Interrupt the cycle and clearly consider if it aligns with what you stand for. You don’t need to act on everything that grabs your attention. #helpfulmess #AskTheQuestions
August 14, 2025 at 3:19 AM
If it makes you mad, you are less likely to see ulterior motives, and more likely to join in the screaming. Anger takes action. Interrupt the cycle and clearly consider if it aligns with what you stand for. You don’t need to act on everything that grabs your attention. #helpfulmess #AskTheQuestions
This is Daisy when I go over the allowed number of brushstrokes, by one. Purr, purr, purr, THE FACE. If you don’t stop at THE FACE, you get THE TEETH. The boundary is drawn, the consequences are communicated clearly, my responsibility is to stop.
#helpfulmess #boundaries #MadCat #communication
#helpfulmess #boundaries #MadCat #communication
August 6, 2025 at 5:45 PM
This is Daisy when I go over the allowed number of brushstrokes, by one. Purr, purr, purr, THE FACE. If you don’t stop at THE FACE, you get THE TEETH. The boundary is drawn, the consequences are communicated clearly, my responsibility is to stop.
#helpfulmess #boundaries #MadCat #communication
#helpfulmess #boundaries #MadCat #communication
How do you hide? Do you try to blend in? Do you refuse to explore new opportunities and try new things? Do you guard yourself with hate or sarcasm to keep people at a distance? Do you turn those voices in on yourself? Chances are you’re just trying to survive. Choose to thrive!
#helpfulmess #Thrive
#helpfulmess #Thrive
July 29, 2025 at 4:54 PM
How do you hide? Do you try to blend in? Do you refuse to explore new opportunities and try new things? Do you guard yourself with hate or sarcasm to keep people at a distance? Do you turn those voices in on yourself? Chances are you’re just trying to survive. Choose to thrive!
#helpfulmess #Thrive
#helpfulmess #Thrive
Change of plans! If you’re the pilot, you’re letting the ground team know the change in course. You’re telling your passengers what they can expect. You’re giving information about safety. Do you do these things for yourself when you encounter change?
July 23, 2025 at 9:27 PM
Change of plans! If you’re the pilot, you’re letting the ground team know the change in course. You’re telling your passengers what they can expect. You’re giving information about safety. Do you do these things for yourself when you encounter change?
Be aware of the limits you set on yourself so you can consciously choose to chase an occasional wild hare. This little hare generally chooses to hide, but he chose stay this once and watch us walk by. Seize the day!
#helpfulmess #bunny #SeizeTheDay #WildHare
#helpfulmess #bunny #SeizeTheDay #WildHare
July 16, 2025 at 2:51 PM
Be aware of the limits you set on yourself so you can consciously choose to chase an occasional wild hare. This little hare generally chooses to hide, but he chose stay this once and watch us walk by. Seize the day!
#helpfulmess #bunny #SeizeTheDay #WildHare
#helpfulmess #bunny #SeizeTheDay #WildHare
July 14, 2025 at 12:36 AM
July 11, 2025 at 3:40 PM
Today's moment of wonder.
July 10, 2025 at 4:49 PM
Today's moment of wonder.
What brings you joy? What makes you feel creative? What brings you a sense of awe and wonder? What makes your muscles relax? Whatever that is, you should probably have more of it in your life. Treat yourself like someone you love.
#helpfulmess #feelSomething #wonder #cranes #LoveYourself
#helpfulmess #feelSomething #wonder #cranes #LoveYourself
July 9, 2025 at 4:36 PM
What brings you joy? What makes you feel creative? What brings you a sense of awe and wonder? What makes your muscles relax? Whatever that is, you should probably have more of it in your life. Treat yourself like someone you love.
#helpfulmess #feelSomething #wonder #cranes #LoveYourself
#helpfulmess #feelSomething #wonder #cranes #LoveYourself
There was nothing wrong with being a white Easter lily. But for this lily, being its true self looked different than that. It chose to embrace the changes and see where they led. Stretching who it was allowed it to flourish.
#helpfulmess #flourish #stretch #grow #EmbraceTheChange #lilies
#helpfulmess #flourish #stretch #grow #EmbraceTheChange #lilies
July 2, 2025 at 3:08 PM
There was nothing wrong with being a white Easter lily. But for this lily, being its true self looked different than that. It chose to embrace the changes and see where they led. Stretching who it was allowed it to flourish.
#helpfulmess #flourish #stretch #grow #EmbraceTheChange #lilies
#helpfulmess #flourish #stretch #grow #EmbraceTheChange #lilies
I tried moving this snapping turtle off the road but it wouldn’t budge. And then it went. Learning where that boundary between “being responsible for” and “lending a hand” falls is really important for your own sanity. You can only control you.
#helpfulmess #letThem #youControlYou #turtles
#helpfulmess #letThem #youControlYou #turtles
June 25, 2025 at 5:40 PM
I tried moving this snapping turtle off the road but it wouldn’t budge. And then it went. Learning where that boundary between “being responsible for” and “lending a hand” falls is really important for your own sanity. You can only control you.
#helpfulmess #letThem #youControlYou #turtles
#helpfulmess #letThem #youControlYou #turtles
My interview with Michael Hingson is now available! We talk about life and building self esteem and how that relates to relationships. youtu.be/U700IuQ02y8
Michael's web site: michaelhingson.com
#UnstoppableMindset #MichaelHingson #helpfulmess
Michael's web site: michaelhingson.com
#UnstoppableMindset #MichaelHingson #helpfulmess
June 24, 2025 at 2:40 PM
My interview with Michael Hingson is now available! We talk about life and building self esteem and how that relates to relationships. youtu.be/U700IuQ02y8
Michael's web site: michaelhingson.com
#UnstoppableMindset #MichaelHingson #helpfulmess
Michael's web site: michaelhingson.com
#UnstoppableMindset #MichaelHingson #helpfulmess