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Michael Baumann

@baumann.bsky.social

12K followers 310 following 6.2K posts

FanGraphs Writer, Piney, Gamecock, Condiment Enthusiast Subscribe to Wheelysports.kit.com (or medium.com/@wheelysports) @michaelbaumann on Twitter baumannwrites at gmail dot com

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Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 9h

Is it just me, or does this postseason have more Jose Caballero than most?

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 9h

"Fan gets postgame photo in tunnel with favorite player" is less of an automatic win than "In-game interview with proud parents of rookie" but not by much

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 9h

Good for that guy, he's having the best night of his life

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 9h

Aww that's adorable

Brian Floyd @brianmfloyd.bsky.social · 10h

this rules so much

the guy who caught cal raleigh’s 61st home run with a fan

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

Victor Robles with some *highly* adventurous baserunning there. Most guys don't round third base looking for trouble

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

How are you the son of, and frequent surrogate for, the billionaire president of the United States and you're doing cable news hits from your laptop at your kitchen table like you're calling in for a 4 p.m. Friday Zoom meeting

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

All the fun stuff was happening in Vienna in 1914

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

Malcolm X and Ho Chi Minh both worked at the hotel kitchen where Boston creme pie was invented, but not at the same time

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

Admiral Isoroku Yamamoto, architect of the Pearl Harbor attack, presumably read outraged local newspaper coverage of the Red Sox selling Babe Ruth when he was studying at Harvard

rax ‘levon honkers’ king @raxkingisdead.bsky.social · 15h

you ever think about those real weird overlaps. like tennessee williams might have listened to the ramones

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

I'm gonna start a rival left-wing Phillies podcast called The NL East is Red

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

No you should not. The time to worry has come and gone, they are already dead.

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 13h

I'm sorry you're getting tagged with "biggest left-wing Phillies podcast out there" and you've only had me on, what, twice all year?

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 15h

Ugh I guess we might as well GIVE UP because everything is RUINED FOREVER

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 15h

Like, obviously it's a ridiculous thing to say, and everything will be fine in the long run. But it's gonna be everyone else's problem until he calms down

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 15h

Last off-season I had the realization that nobody actually believes this. It's like when your dad is bad at emotional regulation and when the car gets a flat tire he starts yelling about the whole thing is broken and we're gonna have to take the kids out of school to pay for new ones.

lauren @lauren.rotatingsandwiches.com · 15h

i know phillies fans are famously not rational but i still think the community should band together to muzzle the guys who are saying the team should tear down to the studs and get rid of everyone, including harper and turner

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 16h

Apparently he took credit for every action movie in the mid-2010s. He'd tell you he killed John Wick's dog too

In 2013, O'Neill told The Montana Standard that he helped rescue SEAL Marcus Luttrell in Afghanistan, and that he was SEAL Team Six's "lead paratrooper" in the rescue of Richard Phillips from the Maersk Alabama hijacking; these missions were the bases of the 2013 films Lone Survivor and Captain Phillips, respectively. However, the former commander of SEAL Team Six said in 2014 that O'Neill had not played a "singular role" on either mission, adding that "O’Neill's specific role on any of these missions is irrelevant because everything we do is as a team."[8]

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 16h

The guy who lied about killing bin Laden?

mother dysnomia 🌚 @mamatried.bsky.social · 20h

lol it’s this guy

Tweet from 11/2/24 showing Harry Sisson and his 4 friends in a car that reads “we’re Gen Z voters and we all PROUDLY voted for Kamala Harris! Real men support Harris”

Robert J O’Neill quotes it with

“You're not men. You're boys. If there was no social media, you would be my concubines.”

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 16h

Oh I've been way more abstruse than this

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 17h

Mariners and Tigers unable to proceed due to rain? What is this, the first half of Life of Pi?

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 18h

No I think if everyone buys a $70,000 two and a half ton hybrid SUV we can beat back climate change

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 18h

In a world where humanity and citizenship has been reduced to consumer status, many people have come to view consumption habits as the primary effective mode of political speech

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 21h

I finally have to replace the 2008 Subaru I thought I'd be buried in and I'm considering a used Soul. I don't need very much car, I just can't go back to that Corolla life

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 21h

There's a South Carolina bunt in an NCAA tournament game 11 years ago that I'm still pissed about and this one was way worse

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 21h

I had one as a rental car at spring training a couple years ago and it was just a delightful experience. We don't make enough cute cheap cars anymore

Michael Baumann @baumann.bsky.social · 22h

A lot of parts are still in motion but the most likely outcome seems to be a long winter of me asking other Phillies fans: "Do you think that'd be constructive or just cathartic?"