ShaneDogmillionaire
@bigdaddyshane.bsky.social
If you didn’t get it, then it wasn’t meant for you.
At this point, if I get picked up by 👽 aliens, I'm just gonna go ahead and consider it a rescue mission 🛸 instead of an abduction.
April 20, 2025 at 3:12 AM
At this point, if I get picked up by 👽 aliens, I'm just gonna go ahead and consider it a rescue mission 🛸 instead of an abduction.
We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now. 🫣
March 4, 2025 at 11:16 PM
We should just cancel April Fools Day this year. No prank can top reality right now. 🫣
A man doesn't know what real happiness is until he's married. Then it's too late.
February 11, 2025 at 3:27 AM
A man doesn't know what real happiness is until he's married. Then it's too late.
Rest In Power, Stan!
January 23, 2025 at 5:17 PM
Rest In Power, Stan!
If she’s ever used mustard for lube in the bedroom……GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
January 7, 2025 at 1:44 AM
If she’s ever used mustard for lube in the bedroom……GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
While you should know, if you don’t know here you go……https://youtu.be/YX5FD4jbBts?si=ewiN0AFbnYzN--za
January 4, 2025 at 3:22 PM
While you should know, if you don’t know here you go……https://youtu.be/YX5FD4jbBts?si=ewiN0AFbnYzN--za
If she prefaces a text at 3:46am with “ I hope I didn’t wake u”…….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 27, 2024 at 5:29 AM
If she prefaces a text at 3:46am with “ I hope I didn’t wake u”…….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If she doesn’t brush her teeth because she thinks toothpaste will make her fat…….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 24, 2024 at 4:56 AM
If she doesn’t brush her teeth because she thinks toothpaste will make her fat…….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If she asks for a price match at the DOLLAR STORE…GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 22, 2024 at 10:22 PM
If she asks for a price match at the DOLLAR STORE…GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If she doesn't think that watermelon is the BEST flavor of Jolly Ranchers..........GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 19, 2024 at 3:03 AM
If she doesn't think that watermelon is the BEST flavor of Jolly Ranchers..........GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If you tell her she’s the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen and she replies “ I know.”….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 18, 2024 at 2:32 AM
If you tell her she’s the most beautiful girl you’ve ever seen and she replies “ I know.”….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If she has a picture of you as the wallpaper on her phone and your 1st date is just wrapping up…..GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 18, 2024 at 2:24 AM
If she has a picture of you as the wallpaper on her phone and your 1st date is just wrapping up…..GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If you work at a Cuban restaurant and you don’t know what mojo sauce is……GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 16, 2024 at 1:48 AM
If you work at a Cuban restaurant and you don’t know what mojo sauce is……GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If her safety word is “HIV”…GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
December 14, 2024 at 1:54 AM
If her safety word is “HIV”…GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!
If she buys a Kit-Kat and breaks you off none…….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!!
December 11, 2024 at 1:16 AM
If she buys a Kit-Kat and breaks you off none…….GROUNDS FOR DISMISSAL!!!!