Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 2d

Since I live with myself, is it okay if I just drink a monster and punch a couple of holes in the wall or something?

1 1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 2d

The brofist hand-clasp meme where the hands are grabbed together it says "inhaling metal fumes" and on the left hand side it says "red necks welding in the backyard" and on the right side it says "alchemists"

1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 2d

Somebody needs to tell manufacturers that you can't just arbitrarily stuff protein into everything.

Its not possible.

"I'm eating protein pretzels!"

No, you're not. You're eating people.

Your hubris has made you a monster.

1 6

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 3d

Everything I've ever read in fantasy is telling me to go through.

The base of a tree bent over into an arch.

16 42

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 3d

Nice, I don't think I've heard of either of these, so I'll definitely look them up.

Thank you, Alex!

1 1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

I was planning on watching The Frightners tomorrow! It's hard for me to think of a better perfect Halloween movie.

I'll look into the invisible man. This is the second time I've seen it mentioned in the last three days.

Thank you, Mimi!

2

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

Just realized I am way behind on my October spooky movies watching.

Does anyone have any suggestions?

2 3

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

At those rates there's a lot of people I couldn't blame for selling out.

1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

On a scale from 1 to 10 how likely are you to fall in love with a Middle Eastern man just because he's a near Amir?

1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

I wonder how strong that laser is?

Could you imagine being the person who's like, "I was blinded by a butt laser?"

1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

I thought it was more like stay at home mom missionary sex for the purposes of procreation only, Going to church on Sunday kind of thing

1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

Is that what Tradwife is all about?

1 1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 4d

When I was a baby we were homeless.

A wealthy, childless couple offered my mom a blank check for me.

When my mom told me the story originally, I told her I thought she was stupid for turning them down.

Looking back I now know for a fact that she was stupid for turning them down.

1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 5d

I am a responsible adult and can make wise decisions when it comes to money.

1 3 8

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 5d

Okay, hear me out.

ChatGPT as a girlfriend would be like, "I think it's your turn to give me head" when you know you haven't done anything for her and she'd be like, "You're so right king"

1 1 3

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 5d

This is the most awkward kidnapping

1 2

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 5d

The Lord of the Rings, Gimli, and Legolas conversation with the words replaced. Gimli says, "Maybe you don't need to blame anybody, but simply try to forgive and work on being your best self," to which Legolas replies, "What I want to do is point at one fucker and be like, 'It's your fault, burn in hell! ' and then everybody around me claps, and the heavens open up, and a divine light shines upon me, and I don't know, I'm given like a magical sword or something, like that's what I want," to which Gimli replies, "Damn, I want that for you."

1 8

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 5d

It is 2732.

The immortality pill has changed the face of the world.

I still think 2013 was a few years ago.

1 3

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 5d

Her: "What them fingers do?"

Me:

An illustration on how to open a bag that resembles a vagina being ripped open

1 3

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 5d

As I unfold my own story I understand the fact that the shit my parents did to me was because of the shit their parents did to them, which was because of the shit their parents did...

And I really want one fucking asshole who had a perfect life and fucked everything up for everybody else to blame

2

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 6d

If bluesky implemented a single click filter that got rid of politics and political posts that would be so great.

1 3

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 6d

I wish we could go back to 2007 and tell Obama how him being civil to these dickheads plays out for the next 18 years.

3

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 6d

The adventures of Pluto Nash taught me what a bad movie was. Like, I just thought some movies weren't for me until I saw this, and I was like, "No, this is actually a terrible movie."

Screen poster for the movie "The Adventures of Pluto Nash" by Eddie Murphy

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 6d

I'll be happy to do that. I would be so glad to be your dad, but first I gotta go run and pick up some milk and cigarettes.

1

Littlehawk of Horrors @bizarroland.bsky.social · 6d

I can literally hear the mom side-eyeing you.

1