Bogey, as in Bogeyman. As in don’t go near the bogeyman kids. He was a paedo.

Asylum seekers are interfering with my TV pictures. (Told to me in all seriousness just last Saturday).

Sounds like you will appreciate the legendary pre-gentrification 'barred list' from my local.

Benefits culture is getting so out of hand for these masters of industry.

Or: White shorts today darling?

I’d spent a month on Duolingo learning Italian before our trip to Florence.
“Posso avere un cornetto per favore “
Total blank face. Already very shaky confidence drained as I pointed to a croissant.

Why are people assuming this is two guys?

Grandma's minge
Used to hand me piece of candy
Grandma's minge
Picked me up each time I fell
Grandma's minge
Boy,it really came in handy
She'd say, Matty don' you whip that boy
What you want to spank him for?
…
But I don't have grandma anymore
If I get to heaven I'll look for
Grandma's minge

Etc

Two things can be true at once.
You are doing good work,GRASS.

Merry Christmas to one and all.

There’s not enough Wild Beasts on 6 music.

It’s good to see some Republicans have called it out as the grotesque and disgraceful statement it is. It’ll be interesting to see just how it’s defended.