Im so sorry. Km so sorry.

I miss my mom

I really want ti stay near my mom

I wanted to work on my mental health. I hoped that one day i wouldnt that mentally ill anymore and could show love and affection to my mom. But i might not even be able to do this

I hate this reminder that things are finite. Tnat people die. That they can just disappear from your life at any moment. My mom definitely feels very unloved and this destroys me. I wish i was a better child

Why did i do that oh my god im gonna killmyself i didnt want to do that why why Oh my god hes a 15YEAR LLLD i cant even say sorry dude im unable to say im sorry j wish i wasnt ohh my god

Id be better off dead

Why did they put me here

I didnt want to be like this

By you it will not make me love 5ou im sotry im so sorry so so soryry im ungrateful as fuck but i cant keep doing this shit. I ewnted to love i also wanted to feel loved but i dont i dont feel loved not even mlby my own oarents. I dont udnerstand i neever will. Understand anything ever

I never 2anted to be like this i never asked to be born i sidnt want to be born why did you even put bme here do tou even like me do youbate me i am hated by my own creators i dont.csre what ppres3nts you give me i dont care how much money you soend on me i t wont take away my feeling of being hated

I really wish i wasnt like this i wanred ro be a normal person i wanred ro love and live liek a normal person k wanted to be a e to say j love mh family i wanted to be able to connect to my friends i eish i didnt have voices telling me they hate me telling me to cut them off before they abandon me i

It is so embarassing. To feel like this. To be this way. To have gone through this. And i cant escape it. I hate my parents. Im ignorant and insensitive but i hate my parents. I am terrified by them. I did it. I deserved it. But i dontcare i dont likewhat you did. Ruined me forever i am unfixable

I dont understand. How would that affect me that badly. My parents dont think too much of it and i dont think They Ever hit me to the point of it leaving visible marks. They were very caring and loving. Mom would always say sorry for hitting us. I cant lie i never really liked the affection.

I think i used to do a lot of things hidden from my parents but i dont know why. I dont know why i had to hide. I dont know why my parents would hit me over these things instead of talking to me. I really dont understand that. I think im more confused than when i was as a kid

Caught being a mischievous little fucker by him was. Terrifying. That didnt make much sense since my mom used to hit us way more than my dad ever did. My mom always accused us of being misogynists or something because of this lmaoooo.
I was just hit with this . Weird feeling-memory of hiding

Which is weirdbecause i really dont know where i would take that from. Maybe i was just born a little evil idk. Makes sense honestly since im a terrible fucking person nowadays
I wasnt as afraid of my mom as i was of my dad. Fuck my dad would scream and id freeze on the spot. The idea of getting

Whats weird is i. Know my parents hit me because i didnt obey them i think? Or because i did something they didnt like?? Fuck i actually dont remember but my mom says she never hit me without a reason. Also she tells me stories of how awful my brother was. Im guessing i was like that too

I dotn remember most of my childhood but i know that i was physically abused, i dont have memories of it, but im like 90% sure i was, so it counts
I also have other very specific memories, and i think its normal to forget things that happened so long ago, so this is not a dissociative amnesia thing