He has 0 business being this perfect
January 1, 2026 at 6:45 PM
He has 0 business being this perfect
Pilates is stupid bc you take one week off and you’re flubber again
December 31, 2025 at 6:16 PM
Pilates is stupid bc you take one week off and you’re flubber again
Being on fb kinda feels like watching Fox news
December 30, 2025 at 6:15 PM
Being on fb kinda feels like watching Fox news
How many days of my life can I live without headphones so far it’s 51
December 30, 2025 at 5:00 PM
How many days of my life can I live without headphones so far it’s 51
If you choose these handles I’m judging you
December 29, 2025 at 10:56 PM
If you choose these handles I’m judging you
Merry Christmas!
December 26, 2025 at 1:34 PM
Merry Christmas!
My parents have a friend here named muffin
December 22, 2025 at 9:43 PM
My parents have a friend here named muffin
@chrysler why oh why put this gear shift dial right next to the volume dial? A case study in ergonomics
December 20, 2025 at 9:02 PM
@chrysler why oh why put this gear shift dial right next to the volume dial? A case study in ergonomics
Accidentally got seltzer instead of still idk how people drink this stuff!!! Burp flavored needle water
December 20, 2025 at 5:22 AM
Accidentally got seltzer instead of still idk how people drink this stuff!!! Burp flavored needle water
I did my body the disservice of buying an entenmann’s cake this week to implore you to do the same. The chocolate one is exquisite
December 19, 2025 at 3:11 PM
I did my body the disservice of buying an entenmann’s cake this week to implore you to do the same. The chocolate one is exquisite
It sucks when my cat wants to hang out in the cabinet instead of being snuggling with me ☹️
December 19, 2025 at 3:03 PM
It sucks when my cat wants to hang out in the cabinet instead of being snuggling with me ☹️
Sending my ai hologram to go to Thirdsdays when
December 18, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Sending my ai hologram to go to Thirdsdays when
It’s actually a power move being in public with a zit such as this
December 18, 2025 at 3:48 PM
It’s actually a power move being in public with a zit such as this
Waiting on bated breath for Brandi Granville’s facial disfigurement diagnosis 🧏🏼♀️
December 15, 2025 at 6:22 PM
Waiting on bated breath for Brandi Granville’s facial disfigurement diagnosis 🧏🏼♀️
Quaking as I type
December 13, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Quaking as I type
You won’t catch me looking good on consecutive days. I have been observing every other ugly day for as long as I can remember. Will be tough on my marriage.
December 1, 2025 at 11:21 PM
You won’t catch me looking good on consecutive days. I have been observing every other ugly day for as long as I can remember. Will be tough on my marriage.
A horror movie about the guy you reject on hinge hundreds of times each time you redownload the app
December 1, 2025 at 5:29 PM
A horror movie about the guy you reject on hinge hundreds of times each time you redownload the app
For my 35th birthday duh and I are going to fly to Korea to get surgeries 🫶
November 30, 2025 at 10:08 PM
For my 35th birthday duh and I are going to fly to Korea to get surgeries 🫶
Is there anyone who has suffered more than contestants on Dancing with the Stars
November 29, 2025 at 6:56 PM
Is there anyone who has suffered more than contestants on Dancing with the Stars
Not entirely sure Apollo isn’t filled with beans
November 29, 2025 at 6:44 PM
Not entirely sure Apollo isn’t filled with beans
Women and men deemed responsible adults should be able to send boys to the military at any age to get hot and learn discipline
November 29, 2025 at 6:39 PM
Women and men deemed responsible adults should be able to send boys to the military at any age to get hot and learn discipline
The hardest part about driving is resisting the urge to cross my legs in cruise control. Does anyone drive like that should I just adjust
November 29, 2025 at 4:51 PM
The hardest part about driving is resisting the urge to cross my legs in cruise control. Does anyone drive like that should I just adjust
How am I supposed to trust star ratings when these are the reviewers
November 29, 2025 at 3:05 AM
How am I supposed to trust star ratings when these are the reviewers
Last night Apollo and I arrived at my parent’s house late and they woke up to greet us in my room and Apollo proceeded to run to the litterbox howling and having explosive diarrhea everywhere. ❤️
November 25, 2025 at 5:25 PM
Last night Apollo and I arrived at my parent’s house late and they woke up to greet us in my room and Apollo proceeded to run to the litterbox howling and having explosive diarrhea everywhere. ❤️
My latest hot take is that mail service should be significantly scaled down to obsolescence.
November 23, 2025 at 5:22 PM
My latest hot take is that mail service should be significantly scaled down to obsolescence.