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clussman.com
Chat Clussman
@clussman.com
330 followers 220 following 1.2K posts
Principal & Creative Director @ Ashandelle.com, shitposter, void yeller. I talk about design, running an agency, art, writing, woodworking, poker, and too much politics.
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clussman.com
UnitedHealth Group's CEO resigned and the company is apparently dragging the whole market down today. Its problems? Q1 revenue was only up TEN BILLION DOLLARS and earnings per share (EPS) was only up 550%, both missing Wall Street forecasts.

www.npr.org/2025/05/13/n...
A screenshot of UnitedHealth Group Inc's financials from Google search showing that the stock, at the time of the screenshot, was down 17% to $314 a share. It also shows that revenue was up, net income was up, earnings per share was up, net profit margin was up, operating income was up, change in cash was up, and... revenue and earnings per share missed Wall Street estimates by 1.82% and 1.28% respectively.
May 13, 2025 at 6:44 PM
clussman.com
I don't have a dog in this. I haven't heard anything about Neo-nazis and Superman. As an agnostic, I just have a slightly different take on Superman as American Jesus which, as a concept, I could see being very appealing to that group.
Brandon Routh as Superman in 2006's Superman Returns. He's falling from the sky in the crucifixion pose as his red cape flutters around him.
May 12, 2025 at 6:06 PM
clussman.com
@richardkadrey.bsky.social I may have stumbled upon Mexico City’s Sub Rosa.
A small, gray, exterior facade of what looks like a closed down shop. Windows are covered. The exterior ground is just bare concrete. The building is sandwiched between two other, larger buildings with no alleys or space between. A deep interior view of a long hallway with gray wood and rooms on other side filled with modern furnishings. Natural light is filtering in from multiple sources that are not the front of the building. A what looks like a custom wood dining table that seats eight sits next to a glass wall that is letting in natural light from the house’s interior courtyard. A natural brick wall and concrete floors complete the setting. Comfy white lounge chairs and large, white, concrete planters encircle a large skylight.
April 3, 2025 at 12:33 AM
clussman.com
Without downloading any new pictures, where are you mentally?
My dog wolf, a yellow shepherd and husky mix, howling with a mixture of concern and hope. He’s surrounded by his playgroup, other medium sized, “high energy” dogs, at doggie daycare. There’s artificial turf, real trees, and, one assumes, treats and a human somewhere just off camera.
March 19, 2025 at 5:27 AM
clussman.com
F*cking bots
Two contrarian bots in the comments arguing that a backbone doesn’t make a good leader.
March 16, 2025 at 7:42 PM
clussman.com
And this is my dog, Wolf, demanding my attention because he saw me taking pictures of one of the cats.

He’s a yowling Shepsky—shepherd/husky mix—that herds the cats to keep them inside and safe.
A medium sized dog demanding that I scratch him while he has his back turned to me. He is at once upset with me and needs to know I love him at least as much as the cats. The shade is making him look reddish but he’s a yellow-white dog with a Husky coat and German Shepherd ears. He is, of course, yowling for attention.
February 28, 2025 at 10:27 PM
clussman.com
Enjoying some beautiful weather from my deck and one of our cats is at the door (they’re not allowed to come outside).
A beautiful brown and black striped tabby with white chest and paws sits in a doorway staring indignantly at the camera man. He’s sitting on faux wood tile. A black shoulder bag sits on the floor behind him. Out of focus (thankfully) in the background is a couch and coffee table. The same striped tabby hangs his head low. (He’s really just sniffing something on the floor but he looks sad as hell.)
February 28, 2025 at 10:22 PM
clussman.com
$TSLA this week. At a P/E ratio of 150, there's lots more room to fall.
A screenshot of Tesla's stock valuation over the last five days as it's lost $68.51/share, bringing it down to $293.26 (as of the time of the screenshot). It's just a jagged red line trending down.
February 26, 2025 at 6:48 PM
clussman.com
What is this, Bluesky? I don’t need ads for domains because a typo left a space out. And it persists after you’ve fixed the typo.
February 25, 2025 at 7:55 PM
clussman.com
Misty asks the question: what would happen if a women wrote this post about dick sizes and, like, yeah!
Can any woman in the comments imagine writing a post about the size of a man’s penis and comparing it to marketing? And what would happen to us if we did? If this guy was going for clicks, he wins. But, as with many things, it’s not the size of your LinkedIn audience, it’s what you do with it. Jose replies: please do this lol
February 17, 2025 at 3:39 PM
clussman.com
Y’all! I woke up a dude on LinkedIn comparing the quality of one’s ideas to women’s breast sizes and that’s going about as well for him as you’d expect.

I was not prepared. I have work to do!
Let’s talk boobs for a sec… 👀 Are they any less valuable if they are attractively presented? 🤔 So my theory is: The larger they are, the more they tend to be covered up. The smaller they are, the more they tend to be “on show”. Obviously there are exceptions to the rule. But it’s got me thinking, the more confidence we have in whatever we’re presenting (boobs or otherwise) the less we tend to shout about it. We might even try to hide our natural “gifts” 🎈🎈😁 Same with words. There are a lot of people in marketing working with A cup ideas and using verbal pushup bras to attract eyeballs, prospects and sales. But there are a quiet minority in turtle necks and big coats packing FF concepts and offers. So if you’re getting annoyed with the people constantly shoving their stuff in your face - know that you’re not alone. So if you’re getting annoyed with the people constantly shoving their stuff in your face - know that you’re not alone. And if you’re somebody who’s self-conscious about the concepts, offers and words YOU have… understand that you’re allowing the tossers with nothing to show to dominate social media. So show off a little more and let’s make marketing classy again. p.s. This is a note to self as much as anything. I’ve been accused of sitting on the sidelines for too long. If you think you might be hiding your assets like I did - reach out.
February 17, 2025 at 3:33 PM
clussman.com
Melanie released her own crypto coin and had a true pump and dump. Released at 3:20pm, ran up 140x, dumped at 4:20. I’m guessing Musk picked the time.
January 20, 2025 at 4:07 AM
clussman.com
@hankgreen.bsky.social you’re never going to see this but I just watched your cannabis vs gambling video and I am sorry I missed when you asked for input! I have one rather large question: how do you define gambling?
A screenshot showing the definitions of the word gamble: 1) Play games of chance for money; bet. 2) Take risky action in the hope of a desired result. Noun: an act of gambling; an enterprise undertaken or attempted with a risk of loss and a chance of profit or success.
December 31, 2024 at 3:17 AM
clussman.com
Best friends and two of the best: Christopher Reeve and Robin Williams.
December 24, 2024 at 5:27 PM
clussman.com
The cats in question
Two stoned cats, one black, one brown, sitting 10 feet apart both staring into space.
December 5, 2024 at 10:37 PM
clussman.com
Bluesky is growing up. I'm getting followers ranging from OnlyFans accounts to catfishers to the illuminati 👀
Screenshot from my followers list showing an account called "The great Illuminati brotherhood".
December 4, 2024 at 6:25 PM
clussman.com
I run a design agency, Ashandelle. I'm going to try sharing some of our work on here and see how that goes. Our name sounds like an elven forest and we work with startups so unicorns became a key brand element for us. Also, they're fun!

You can see more of our work at ashandelle.com.
December 4, 2024 at 5:46 PM
clussman.com
I'd like to suggest a grammar rule change:

The abbreviation of 'assorted' should be 'ass', not 'asstd', and it should be used whenever possible.

I'll be taking no questions at this time.
A yellow grocery sign reading 'Ass. cream cake $3.69'.
November 27, 2024 at 7:22 PM
clussman.com
Lots of people know about it but I'm sharing it anyway: Whistlepig 10yr rye whiskey is my absolute favorite whiskey (because the 12 yr is 2x the price).

Less well known: Jameson Black Barrel has a similar flavor profile for half the price.
A picture of Whistlepig's 10 year rye whiskey bottle on a white background. The bottle is shaped like a typical maple syrup bottle. (Whistlepig's mash was originally sourced from Canada.) The whiskey has a honey color to it. A tall bottle of Jameson Black Barrel whiskey on a white background. The bottle is shaped similar to a wine bottle. It had a black label with bold white lettering that reads 'Black Barrel'. The honey brown liquid inside is a touch lighter than the Whistlepig rye.
November 27, 2024 at 7:03 PM
clussman.com
Show me a picture on your phone that has your energy that isn’t a selfie.
Dog excitedly splashing in the pool with a happy-slash-goody expression on its face.
November 27, 2024 at 5:37 PM
clussman.com
Post a picture you took without explanation (unless you read my alt text because it’s important to use alt text for people with vision issues)
I tried to sweep a Texas red-headed centipede off our driveway because it kept trying to get into the garage and it decided to come for me instead. Picture shows it climbing up the broom bristles toward the handle. It’s about 10” long.
November 18, 2024 at 12:39 AM
clussman.com
Post a picture of yourself to show the newbies what they're dealing with
Me raising a sword while riding on a rearing unicorn. An archer is riding backwards behind me, knocking a flaming arrrow to her bow. The background is pink and there is a thick layer of fog on the ground.
November 16, 2024 at 8:46 AM
clussman.com
OMG
Franklin Leonard: Weird how all of the pro meritocracy people are quiet about the prospect of Attorney General Matt Gaetz. zane: DUI hire
November 14, 2024 at 6:48 PM
clussman.com
Bluesky clocking in at #3 on top apps in the iOS store today. X clocks in at *checks notes* 27.
The iOS top apps list showing Bluesky at #3. The iOS top apps list showing X in 27th place.
November 12, 2024 at 11:17 PM
clussman.com
Trump won Tuesday and troglodytes felt comfortable doing this at Texas State on Wednesday.
A troglodytic person holding two signs. One reads “Homo sex is sin.” The second reads: “Types of property: women, slaves, animals, cars, land, etc…”
November 7, 2024 at 2:48 PM