Crotchy_The_Conjurer
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crotchytheconjurer.bsky.social
Crotchy_The_Conjurer
@crotchytheconjurer.bsky.social
Would you like to see my wares?
Anyone seen my Son Uppie? He is about half the size of 6’6 man and has brown hair and is wearing clothes. #Crotchytheconjurer #Uppie #Missingperson #magic #wizard #spellcasting
November 14, 2024 at 4:18 PM
Cheese cake recipe
November 13, 2024 at 8:20 PM
Bees churger
November 12, 2024 at 9:43 PM
Someone just sent me this image of me cursing that bitch Bethany at #McDonalds I must say I look mighty Thick today with my belly rolls. #Crotchytheconjurer #mage #Curses #wizard #Magic #forbidden #Spells #Thecursethatmakesfatchicksgocrazy #MILF #BONELESS
November 12, 2024 at 11:40 AM
Anyone know the incantation for the spell that summons beautiful Taiwanese women looking for visas?
#Crotchytheconjurer #Spell #magic #incantation #blackmagic #wizard #Relationship #Singlebutmarried #Taiwan #Ladyboys #ASAP #Forbiddenspell #Visa #Aidscrisis
November 12, 2024 at 9:51 AM
Great Conference last night done some pixie dust with a good pal of mine @audibun.bsky.social who is not only skilful in the art of Botany but also a great supplier of pixie dust. #crotchytheconjurer #pixiedust #magic #wizard #Conference #spells #Botany #darkmagic #Drugs #ThebestWizard #Mastermagic
November 12, 2024 at 9:11 AM
Currently in a conference for all the Wizards in North America with Vermin supreme as a guest speaker. #Crotchytheconjurer #Wizard #magic #Conference #Verminsupreme #spells
November 11, 2024 at 8:45 AM
Got some potions brewed up if anyone needs some be warned I don’t label shit so it’s a gamble. Im pretty sure I have a potion to cure cancer and maybe one that can give you erectile dysfunction. Im at the Miles Marker, 263 Florida Orlando. #crotchytheconjurer #Magic #potions #wizard #Florida (pic)
November 10, 2024 at 12:21 PM
Family picture of me, my fat fucking pregnant wife Elaine the witch and Uppie. #Crotchytheconjurer #magic #family #wizard #Witch #pregnant #familypicture
November 9, 2024 at 10:42 PM
Sorry I didn’t post yesterday I was in another dimension fighting a gnome named Nimble-finger Mcgregor. That bitch stole my magical bag of Wizard Weed then I got detained by Dimensional security. (Pic of me being detained) #crotchytheconjurer #Dimensionalsecurity #Wizardweed #FuckGnomes #magic
November 9, 2024 at 2:00 PM
Just found this sick fucking shirt in a bathroom stall in a Gas station near my lair. If it’s yours you are not getting it back it now has my smelly water funk to it. #crotchytheconjurer #wizard #freeshirt #Crotchyforpresident2029 #magic #singleandreadytomakesomesweetsweetdwarvenlovetooldladies
November 7, 2024 at 3:31 PM
Just found out that apparently Costco don’t accept Dwarves as payment I mean what has this economy become if an upstanding wizard like myself can’t pay for 20 boxes of Cheese balls with three strong Dwarves. CURSE YOU US ECONMY!!!! #Crotchytheconjurer #Costco #Magic #DwarvenSlaves
November 7, 2024 at 2:57 PM
Bout to destroy the #Gastationbathroom toilet by blowing mud out my third eye (I have sever diarrhoea after drinking a funky potion I got from my friend Glen the glitter man) #crotchytheconjurer #magic #diarrhoea #Glentheglitterman #Wizardshits #wizard
November 7, 2024 at 12:41 PM
Just little cheeky pic before I transcend time and become one with magic. #crotchytheconjurer #magic #wizardweed #wizard #gonnabecomegod
November 7, 2024 at 11:16 AM
After that magic battle I have finally secured the witch piss! Soon I will have my hands on the Wizard weed. #Crotchytheconjurer #magic #witch #wizardbattle #Witchpiss #Gasstation #Wizard #WizardWeed
November 7, 2024 at 11:05 AM
November 7, 2024 at 9:04 AM
Bout to burn this witch for her piss
November 7, 2024 at 9:03 AM
Anyone seen Dave the magical cheese wizard? He owes me 35 large. If anyone has seen him let me know. If you are reading this Dave I have taken your familiar Sponge and will be teaching him dark spells (Here is a pic of that fat fucking cat) #Crotchytheconjurer #wizard #Gasstationbathroom #magicspell
November 7, 2024 at 8:52 AM
Anyone know of any good spots to find Wizard weed? #crotchytheconjurer
November 6, 2024 at 5:36 PM
I don’t get it are Americans just really really dumb I mean why did they elect an orange and not the banana into office #USA #elections #wizard #crotchytheconjurer #orangevsbanana
November 6, 2024 at 5:33 PM
Bout to curse that bitch who only gave me 19 chicken nuggets and not 20 (pic of me looking cool) #crotchytheconjurer #curses #mcdonalds #bethany #Wizard #magic #prettyflyforawizardguy
November 6, 2024 at 5:25 PM
Where is John Belushi I would like to fist fight him in a Dennys parking lot he has 24 hours to respond to this Wizard duel if not he then forfeits his wife to me #Crotchytheconjurer #Wizard #Dennys #wizardduel #gasstationbathroom
November 6, 2024 at 5:21 PM
Who would like to smoke some wizard Hash (old women only please)
November 6, 2024 at 5:09 PM
Who ever liked my posted I have blessed you with a spell you can thank me later ps it’s a pregnant pigeon
November 6, 2024 at 5:06 PM
#promosky

My interests are:

🪄Gas station bathrooms

🪄Wizardry

🪄aids crisis

🪄magic

🪄potions

🪄Dabloons

🪄fantasy

🪄being a father of dwarves

🪄Magical herbs *wink wink*

🪄starting a rebellion against evil

🪄Dog food

🪄Wizard clothes

🪄Balls (Of the cheese variety)

🪄old women

🪄witches
November 6, 2024 at 4:53 PM