I think even the not gay residents are starting to clock it (like when we were hanging out w one of the chiefs & she just casually lay down and put her head in my lap? babe what)

I am so deeply in love with her it’s such a fucking problem

did we kiss at midnight? on the cheeks in the most awkward way!! did I watch her make out w multiple strangers? yes
do I know where this leaves us? absolutely not

I can never trust myself to go to a book event with either of them bc I am fairly certain I would just…melt. or explode.

AND more roots of chaos, too? with Marosa, specifically? For the love of everything holy…

like yeah sure I’m crying more than I’ve ever cried before bc I’m alone in caring about these patients but sure tell me how hard your life is that you’re not ~intellectually stimulated~ bc you’re operating so much

also when I was on nights covering the high risk/MFM service with shit-ass guidance from my lazy chief & a daytime team that couldn’t/wouldn’t come up w concrete plans, she kept being like “ugh I miss like interesting medicine, all I do is scheduled sections all day”

also she’s the last among us to do gyn onc & she had been on the rotation for ONE HOUR and was already like “god I hate this” girl what you are one hour in and it’s a clinic day. calm down. she also has like the best chief, too, so like ????

like yeah sis you can’t just take the pager home and expect people to be normal about it? when you keep doing it in the middle of your second year? Tf?

she took a pager all the way home last week & when I was looking for it, called me to be like “do I have to bring it back or can you figure it out” so I figured it out which meant I got paged 2x as much
she almost left w the pager today & now she’s whining that the pgy3 gave her attitude about it

what also made me unwell? co-res demonstrating (in front of our friends/colleagues) exactly how gay it was by being like “that part where they held hands & stared at each other??” AND DOING IT TO ME girl why you staring into my soul like that leggo my hand

like what in the flipping hell is wrong w her that she is such a toxic diva (& how did I allow her so much space in my life for so long)