The joys. Fortunately most people who know me know I’d run a mile from bother, so when I tell the tales of Marseille 98 and Bratislava 02 and my lack of exploits, it has a distinct ring of truth.

Just before the start of my England days. I was blissfully unaware for 2 days that it had happened. Only found out when I got chatting to a Thugby/Noblot fan from Chorley who I met in a crowd of less than 2k at the MCG watching Victoria v Queensland in the Sheffield Shield. Weird.

Well not in the future. A lot of people forget we were 8 minutes, and then a penalty shootout, away from 2 consecutive finals.

I can confirm it’s true. The obvious solution is for Danson to fund your taperia exploits for the foreseeable future.

You need to find Harrison Bettoni branded glasses.

Seriously? I know he was only on the field for 13 mins plus stoppages, but you can’t give it to anyone but Bettoni.

Depending on how long it takes you to get through the sherry.

Sauntering over to Plough Lane in about an hour. I feel like the Aussie soap - home and away.

I met one of the children he rescued when in my teens - the wonderful Milena Grenfell-Baines. As the generation that lived through the holocaust slowly passes into memory, I consider it our duty as the next generation to keep that memory alive. Never again is now.

Grok eventually found an account called onetallteen which claimed to have been a passenger on the train. Last night that account posted, then quickly deleted, an obviously AI generated image of a train ticket as proof. If it weren’t so grim it would be fucking hilarious.

You’d be amazed* how many England fans at home games, particularly friendlies, scan in then walk straight out just to get loyalty points for future matches.**

* You wouldn’t be amazed.

** Not me just in case anyone in authority at the England Supporters Travel Club follows Neil on here.

I love it when you get a generic reference to “meat” on the English menu. I remember ordering “meat plate” in Kiev during Euro 2012. I say “remember” - the quadruple measures of premium standard Russian vodka caused significant memory leakage.

Enjoy Riga and safe travels.

A mate of mine stood for the local council. Swears blind that the returning officer ruled that the fact that the jizz from a drawing of a spunking cock landed in the box (ooer missus) of one candidate was a valid vote for them.

I was at that game - and bizarrely ended up driving to St Helens straight after. I go to the Little Taperia a couple of times a year. Last time was in June celebrating end of exams. Excellent stuff.

I must do Exeter some time. A good mate lives in Newton Abbott so I really haven’t got an excuse.

A mate of mine has just moved into the flats at Wimbledon’s ground so that game should be a shoe-in for me.

Tooting is my neck of the woods. If you haven’t been before, The Little Taperia on Tooting High Street is fabulous.