Dan Shattuck
@danshattuck.bsky.social
TV writer, whisky enthusiast, Cubs season ticket holder
I have a significant number of socks that are marked right and left. In theory, I should choose the correct first sock 50% of the time, but my lifetime hit rate has got to be was so in the 20s. Weird.
January 4, 2026 at 6:34 PM
I have a significant number of socks that are marked right and left. In theory, I should choose the correct first sock 50% of the time, but my lifetime hit rate has got to be was so in the 20s. Weird.
Grams are better than ounces.
Yards are nonsense.
Miles are an abomination.
BUT
Feet are better than meters.
Fahrenheit runs laps around Celsius.
Yards are nonsense.
Miles are an abomination.
BUT
Feet are better than meters.
Fahrenheit runs laps around Celsius.
December 6, 2025 at 4:43 PM
Grams are better than ounces.
Yards are nonsense.
Miles are an abomination.
BUT
Feet are better than meters.
Fahrenheit runs laps around Celsius.
Yards are nonsense.
Miles are an abomination.
BUT
Feet are better than meters.
Fahrenheit runs laps around Celsius.
Here’s the thing, humans have no business driving cars. We show our whole ass everyday, in every possible way.
November 20, 2025 at 5:00 PM
Here’s the thing, humans have no business driving cars. We show our whole ass everyday, in every possible way.
Is Petite Plume selling a progressive harem lifestyle?
November 5, 2025 at 3:52 PM
Is Petite Plume selling a progressive harem lifestyle?
I think it’s funny that baseball players are almost uniformly conservative and baseball writers are almost uniformly communist.
November 2, 2025 at 4:12 AM
I think it’s funny that baseball players are almost uniformly conservative and baseball writers are almost uniformly communist.
The exact same home run Rajai Davis hit off Aroldis Chapman in game 7, 2016.
November 2, 2025 at 3:22 AM
The exact same home run Rajai Davis hit off Aroldis Chapman in game 7, 2016.
Watching SEA @ TOR on Sling and the audio sync seems off by about 1/2 second. Anyone else getting that?
October 13, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Watching SEA @ TOR on Sling and the audio sync seems off by about 1/2 second. Anyone else getting that?
It’s nice that Twitter isn’t Twitter anymore cuz now we can just call everything tweets.
September 25, 2025 at 3:58 AM
It’s nice that Twitter isn’t Twitter anymore cuz now we can just call everything tweets.
I challenge you to find greater last words than those of Sister Catherine Rose Holzman, who said “To Katy Perry, please stop” and then collapsed.
September 13, 2025 at 9:18 PM
I challenge you to find greater last words than those of Sister Catherine Rose Holzman, who said “To Katy Perry, please stop” and then collapsed.
Reality is engaging in a major counteroffensive. Not sure it will persevere, but at least it will go down swinging.
July 18, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Reality is engaging in a major counteroffensive. Not sure it will persevere, but at least it will go down swinging.
Weird level of cruelty directed at Andrew Vaughn tonight from the online baseball community.
July 10, 2025 at 3:01 AM
Weird level of cruelty directed at Andrew Vaughn tonight from the online baseball community.
Doesn’t matter if the room’s completely empty, every time I stand at a urinal I’m afraid someone will come from behind and smash my face into the wall while my dick’s out.
June 18, 2025 at 11:55 PM
Doesn’t matter if the room’s completely empty, every time I stand at a urinal I’m afraid someone will come from behind and smash my face into the wall while my dick’s out.
Absolutely using my ASG votes for this worthy project.
This year should be the 1st time the Rockies send 9 players to the All-Star Game. Vote, it's duty!
June 5, 2025 at 3:18 AM
Absolutely using my ASG votes for this worthy project.
Pfaadt gave up 8 ER on 31 pitches and did not record an out.
June 1, 2025 at 2:54 AM
Pfaadt gave up 8 ER on 31 pitches and did not record an out.
What exactly does ONE YEAR LATER mean in Star Wars?
One Earth Year? We’re in a galaxy far, far away.
One Coruscant year?
How many Ghorman Days in one Coruscant Year?
How many Yavin 4 Hours in a Ghorman Day?
One Earth Year? We’re in a galaxy far, far away.
One Coruscant year?
How many Ghorman Days in one Coruscant Year?
How many Yavin 4 Hours in a Ghorman Day?
May 20, 2025 at 4:21 AM
What exactly does ONE YEAR LATER mean in Star Wars?
One Earth Year? We’re in a galaxy far, far away.
One Coruscant year?
How many Ghorman Days in one Coruscant Year?
How many Yavin 4 Hours in a Ghorman Day?
One Earth Year? We’re in a galaxy far, far away.
One Coruscant year?
How many Ghorman Days in one Coruscant Year?
How many Yavin 4 Hours in a Ghorman Day?
i’m begging you please god someone invent an alternative to hyperion
May 8, 2025 at 12:19 AM
i’m begging you please god someone invent an alternative to hyperion
actually i love trump and i always have
www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
Trump announces 100% tariffs on movies ‘produced in foreign lands’
President calls films ‘national security threat’ and claims he called on commerce department to immediately enact tariff
www.theguardian.com
May 5, 2025 at 4:28 AM
actually i love trump and i always have
www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
I am 100% confident that the opening credits for Your Friends & Neighbors holds the record for most names with a double letter.
April 19, 2025 at 5:28 AM
I am 100% confident that the opening credits for Your Friends & Neighbors holds the record for most names with a double letter.
The 8th inning in this ARI @ CHC game has to be historic in some way.
Most combined runs in an inning with two lead changes?
Most combined runs in an inning with two lead changes?
April 18, 2025 at 9:25 PM
The 8th inning in this ARI @ CHC game has to be historic in some way.
Most combined runs in an inning with two lead changes?
Most combined runs in an inning with two lead changes?
I hate his personality and the way he communicates and how he divides the country, but whatever, he’s good on the economy.
April 9, 2025 at 3:15 PM
I hate his personality and the way he communicates and how he divides the country, but whatever, he’s good on the economy.
If you think a bully can accomplish more than a leader, you haven’t been paying attention since middle school.
April 6, 2025 at 6:00 PM
If you think a bully can accomplish more than a leader, you haven’t been paying attention since middle school.
of all the things i don't understand, Pete Davidson is the one i don't understand the most
March 29, 2025 at 4:27 AM
of all the things i don't understand, Pete Davidson is the one i don't understand the most