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Darren Mart 🐶

@darrenmart.bsky.social

3.2K followers 2.2K following 6.1K posts

Software engineer near Seattle. INFJ. Francophile. Love my wife, stepkiddos, dogs, pineapple on pizza, retro gaming, learning new things. If you're MAGA the door's over there. 👉

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · Nov 15

A 🧵 to remind myself:

In 2016 I took an extended trip to France. I'd been learning the language for ~2 years and thought it'd be a great way to gauge my progress. I had visions of spontaneous conversations with French natives at cafes and museums. I was going to be the charming American.
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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 38m

No matter what happens to the Phillies or Mariners, this was a nice consolation prize.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 59m

I'd like this 100x if I could. All throughout Biden's term the legal wonks kept insisting justice was coming for Trump. Despite being wrong countless times they still expressed "shock" before resetting and doubling down.

They've invested so much in the system they refuse to see what outsiders see.

Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1h

If there's not a term for this phenomenon there should be. Happens often in empty movie theaters too.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 11h

Demonstrated in this pic of Penny:

✅ She loves autumn.
✅ She's about to pounce on you and play way, way, WAY too rough. We're working on that.

Penny the German Shepherd is recoiling and about to spring forward, unaware of her own strength and ability to harm people unintentionally.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 16h

This "ANTIFA roundtable" is one of the most ridiculous things I've ever seen — and that's an incredibly long list given this regime. You're goddamn right I'm anti-fascist and I'm pissed I haven't received any ANTIFA swag.

A visibly unwell Trump is flanked by Bondi and Noem while Patel sits off to the side in a stupor.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 17h

This one's Sidney Sleep but apparently there's a few different brands that do this now. They arrive sealed and rolled so most of the instructions are about letting them expand and getting rid of whatever scent they have from the factory.

Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 17h

Sidney Sleep, I guess there's a bunch of different brands along these lines.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 18h

It didn't occur to me that the U was to be used with other attachments, brushes, etc. Makes total sense now. 😂

Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 19h

It is and ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh now I get it!

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 19h

That's funny, we recently got a new vacuum and I swear I couldn't identify half of the attachments. One was U-shaped and for the life of me I couldn't imagine a scenario where I'd need that. I may not have a growth mindset in this space.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 19h

And of course:
✅ do not eat

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 19h

My new pillow came with a page of instructions:
✅ air it out for 48 hours
✅ wash the outer cover
✅ put it in dryer on low
✅ add extra fill as needed

I'm so old I remember when a pillow's instructions were:
✅ put on bed

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 22h

Fair point, it's hard to believe Expedition 33 emerged from the cesspool that is 2025.

Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 22h

It felt like I was watching a poorly written villain in a low-budget film. I'm having trouble accepting that such cartoonishly evil people exist.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 22h

Hmmm, add Patty and Selma from The Simpsons and you've got quite an array of sexy voices there. Janice from Friends would complete the set.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 22h

Relatable, Murphy. I'm tired too.

Murphy the Golden Retriever uses his toy whale as a chin pillow.

Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 23h

I've been asking myself what the tipping point will be, whose arrest/imprisonment will finally make us realize this is real and won't stop on its own. Feels like we're going to find out pretty soon.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

Just consider your first 20+ posts to be a way to introduce yourself and you can expect very little engagement. Then start replying on threads and following people and you should see an increase. It's always frustrating at first.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

Was really something watching the Mariners tonight, quietly and confidently executing and just plain showing up. In other words, stuff we haven't really seen much in October for three years.

Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

A phenomenon I'm witnessing firsthand in Big Tech: small groups of cherry-picked "rock stars" are death-marching to release moonshot AI projects/features which, if successful, will put many of their colleagues out of work.

A rising tide lifts all boats? Not in Big Tech right now. Maybe never again.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

Really impressive win (well, through the first 8), Ms just quietly executed with confidence. Phillies are my #1 team so you can understand why I'm jealous.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

Don't suppose you could support the Yankees for a couple hours?

Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

Nothing will happen. Nothing ever does.

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

"Miller CAUGHT saying the quiet part out loud!"
"Trump has DISASTER presser!"
"Bondi IMPLODES at oversight hearing!"

So tired of these bait-y headlines. When are y'all gonna realize these people are evil w/ NO shame, that these things you're framing as some sort of victory aren't victories at all?

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Darren Mart 🐶 @darrenmart.bsky.social · 1d

I see they're exempt from Hegseth's standards.