── 𝓣𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐀 𝓓𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓.
@davenreporter.bsky.social
𝙏𝙀𝙇𝙀 ─ 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝗖𝗔𝗥𝗘𝗦 ,
@donalddavenport.bsky.social .
WRITTEN BY ELYSIA.
Pinned
you see, he's my husband's best friend .
when donald and i got married and we moved into his place ── eddy became VERY jealous of me, since he wasn't getting ALL of his attention anymore . 😒
when donald and i got married and we moved into his place ── eddy became VERY jealous of me, since he wasn't getting ALL of his attention anymore . 😒
[Clover now seems VERY alarmed.]
And… did you do anything to set this feller off? Or is he just… a supervillain or sum’n?
And… did you do anything to set this feller off? Or is he just… a supervillain or sum’n?
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eddy ALSO knows i get vioIently sick when i consume thousand island dressing ... i'm sure you can guess what he did .
he also froze me ' like a turkey ' during my anniversary dinner with my husband . 😒
eddy ALSO knows i get vioIently sick when i consume thousand island dressing ... i'm sure you can guess what he did .
he also froze me ' like a turkey ' during my anniversary dinner with my husband . 😒
February 11, 2026 at 5:28 AM
you see, he's my husband's best friend .
when donald and i got married and we moved into his place ── eddy became VERY jealous of me, since he wasn't getting ALL of his attention anymore . 😒
when donald and i got married and we moved into his place ── eddy became VERY jealous of me, since he wasn't getting ALL of his attention anymore . 😒
i'll give you a couple . not all, but a couple .
my son once got him stuck in my body . let's just say, because of him, i was banned from the grocery store, gas station, zoo, and mall ... oh, my parents broke up ── and did i mention he embarrassed me on television .ᐣ
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my son once got him stuck in my body . let's just say, because of him, i was banned from the grocery store, gas station, zoo, and mall ... oh, my parents broke up ── and did i mention he embarrassed me on television .ᐣ
( + )
[Clover is starting to seem alarmed.]
Maybe jus’ one example?
Maybe jus’ one example?
... we'd be sitting here for days if i were to give you a whole list . 😒
February 11, 2026 at 5:22 AM
i'll give you a couple . not all, but a couple .
my son once got him stuck in my body . let's just say, because of him, i was banned from the grocery store, gas station, zoo, and mall ... oh, my parents broke up ── and did i mention he embarrassed me on television .ᐣ
( + )
my son once got him stuck in my body . let's just say, because of him, i was banned from the grocery store, gas station, zoo, and mall ... oh, my parents broke up ── and did i mention he embarrassed me on television .ᐣ
( + )
... we'd be sitting here for days if i were to give you a whole list . 😒
What did Eddy even do, anyhow…?
oh, he's worse than bad . trust me .
February 11, 2026 at 5:14 AM
... we'd be sitting here for days if i were to give you a whole list . 😒
oh, he's worse than bad . trust me .
Surely this Eddy feller cain’t be THAT bad… 💧
believe me, if you knew eddy ── you would feel the same way as i do . 😒
February 11, 2026 at 5:10 AM
oh, he's worse than bad . trust me .
believe me, if you knew eddy ── you would feel the same way as i do . 😒
I’unno what in tarnation that last thing is, but is violence really necessary here, ma’am?
when i get my hands on that deranged emoticon .... 💢
February 11, 2026 at 5:08 AM
believe me, if you knew eddy ── you would feel the same way as i do . 😒
when i get my hands on that deranged emoticon .... 💢
February 11, 2026 at 5:05 AM
when i get my hands on that deranged emoticon .... 💢
Reposted by ── 𝓣𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐀 𝓓𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐏𝐎𝐑𝐓.
February 11, 2026 at 1:35 AM
February 11, 2026 at 1:35 AM
February 11, 2026 at 1:12 AM
james gets it .
February 10, 2026 at 9:04 PM
james gets it .
adam, honey ── that is NOT bedbug .
February 10, 2026 at 7:51 PM
adam, honey ── that is NOT bedbug .
the feeling is mutual ── here, eddy . i have a solution that will benefit BOTH of us .
February 10, 2026 at 6:48 AM
the feeling is mutual ── here, eddy . i have a solution that will benefit BOTH of us .
February 10, 2026 at 6:28 AM