Derek
@derekmahr.bsky.social
That dude you know from that place with the thing.
He/Him
He/Him
I don't know if the NSA is watching me, but if they do, they better like hearing about my dog.
December 27, 2025 at 10:26 PM
I don't know if the NSA is watching me, but if they do, they better like hearing about my dog.
I havent mentioned it in a few hours, but MAN I have a good doggie.
December 27, 2025 at 10:24 PM
I havent mentioned it in a few hours, but MAN I have a good doggie.
I havent watched Stranger Things in what feels like a century, and yet, I'm still only 2 seasons behind.
Unlike Grey's Anatomy, which I am all the seasons behind on.
Unlike Grey's Anatomy, which I am all the seasons behind on.
December 27, 2025 at 9:37 PM
I havent watched Stranger Things in what feels like a century, and yet, I'm still only 2 seasons behind.
Unlike Grey's Anatomy, which I am all the seasons behind on.
Unlike Grey's Anatomy, which I am all the seasons behind on.
"Boys are so much easier than girls"
My (both afab, on the verge of puberty) niblings:
My (both afab, on the verge of puberty) niblings:
a cat is sitting on a person 's lap and looking at another cat .
ALT: a cat is sitting on a person 's lap and looking at another cat .
media.tenor.com
December 27, 2025 at 9:29 PM
"Boys are so much easier than girls"
My (both afab, on the verge of puberty) niblings:
My (both afab, on the verge of puberty) niblings:
This is a real scene that happened outside a Birmingham hospital. Elong told me.
a cartoon of a coyote running with a rope around his neck
ALT: a cartoon of a coyote running with a rope around his neck
media.tenor.com
December 27, 2025 at 6:50 PM
This is a real scene that happened outside a Birmingham hospital. Elong told me.
Automated job listings are hilarious
“Would you like to be the assistant director of student athlete relations for Drake (yes, utterly unqualified) or the manager of an Arby’s? (No)
“Would you like to be the assistant director of student athlete relations for Drake (yes, utterly unqualified) or the manager of an Arby’s? (No)
December 27, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Automated job listings are hilarious
“Would you like to be the assistant director of student athlete relations for Drake (yes, utterly unqualified) or the manager of an Arby’s? (No)
“Would you like to be the assistant director of student athlete relations for Drake (yes, utterly unqualified) or the manager of an Arby’s? (No)
I don’t think 4d is my jam.
a man with a mohawk and the words it was worth a try .
ALT: a man with a mohawk and the words it was worth a try .
media.tenor.com
December 26, 2025 at 10:16 PM
I don’t think 4d is my jam.
My 12 hear old nibling got big ol chonky heels that put her into a height that reminds me of my aunt Sally and my friend Heidi.
December 26, 2025 at 3:22 AM
My 12 hear old nibling got big ol chonky heels that put her into a height that reminds me of my aunt Sally and my friend Heidi.
Christmas 2025 with my horror wimp niblings and @crobertcargill.bsky.social’s the Grabber
December 26, 2025 at 1:30 AM
Christmas 2025 with my horror wimp niblings and @crobertcargill.bsky.social’s the Grabber
Magnum, P.I. - Opening Theme
YouTube video by Madman Films
youtube.com
December 25, 2025 at 11:24 PM
Christmas Ham, bitches
December 25, 2025 at 11:20 PM
Christmas Ham, bitches
I’m not wearing it at the minute but my Dad got me the Magnum PI red Hawaiian shirt.
All I can hear in my head is
“Duh nuh nuh nuh NUH NUH na na, duh nuh nuh na nuh”
All I can hear in my head is
“Duh nuh nuh nuh NUH NUH na na, duh nuh nuh na nuh”
a man wearing a red shirt with a floral pattern
ALT: a man wearing a red shirt with a floral pattern
media.tenor.com
December 25, 2025 at 7:23 PM
I’m not wearing it at the minute but my Dad got me the Magnum PI red Hawaiian shirt.
All I can hear in my head is
“Duh nuh nuh nuh NUH NUH na na, duh nuh nuh na nuh”
All I can hear in my head is
“Duh nuh nuh nuh NUH NUH na na, duh nuh nuh na nuh”
It’s a Joe bob kinda Christmas. #mutantfam #thelastdrivein
December 25, 2025 at 7:17 PM
It’s a Joe bob kinda Christmas. #mutantfam #thelastdrivein
I’m as or more excited to make the Christmas ham I put in the oven for my extended family as I was for presents. Evidently I actually am a grownup. Who knew?
December 25, 2025 at 5:27 PM
I’m as or more excited to make the Christmas ham I put in the oven for my extended family as I was for presents. Evidently I actually am a grownup. Who knew?
All through opening presents with my niblings, sibling and dad, my dog just wanted to cuddle. He’s such a sweet boy, I almost can’t stand it
December 25, 2025 at 4:35 PM
All through opening presents with my niblings, sibling and dad, my dog just wanted to cuddle. He’s such a sweet boy, I almost can’t stand it
My dog has a bark I normally only hear when he’s about to get his favorite treat. I’ve heard it five times THIS MORNING.
This isn’t a house full of joy or anything, lol.
This isn’t a house full of joy or anything, lol.
December 24, 2025 at 2:40 PM
My dog has a bark I normally only hear when he’s about to get his favorite treat. I’ve heard it five times THIS MORNING.
This isn’t a house full of joy or anything, lol.
This isn’t a house full of joy or anything, lol.
I say it every year, any movie you make part of your Christmastine ritual is a Christmas movie, IDGAF. Movies are there to be loved.
a man wearing a santa hat and a sweatshirt that says now i have a machine gun
ALT: a man wearing a santa hat and a sweatshirt that says now i have a machine gun
media.tenor.com
December 23, 2025 at 9:54 PM
I say it every year, any movie you make part of your Christmastine ritual is a Christmas movie, IDGAF. Movies are there to be loved.
My BUBBAS are here!!!!!!
December 23, 2025 at 5:58 PM
My BUBBAS are here!!!!!!
I pick up my sister and the bubbas in a few hours!
OMG! THE BUBBAS ARE ALMOST HERE!!!
(I really love my niblings)
OMG! THE BUBBAS ARE ALMOST HERE!!!
(I really love my niblings)
December 23, 2025 at 2:35 PM
I pick up my sister and the bubbas in a few hours!
OMG! THE BUBBAS ARE ALMOST HERE!!!
(I really love my niblings)
OMG! THE BUBBAS ARE ALMOST HERE!!!
(I really love my niblings)
Omg I got everything done today.
I’m ready to cry about it.
I did my whole list.
Jesus fuck I’m my mother’s son
I’m ready to cry about it.
I did my whole list.
Jesus fuck I’m my mother’s son
December 23, 2025 at 12:45 AM
Omg I got everything done today.
I’m ready to cry about it.
I did my whole list.
Jesus fuck I’m my mother’s son
I’m ready to cry about it.
I did my whole list.
Jesus fuck I’m my mother’s son
Despite my Dad not being able to help because of pain (which we are managing with edibles, leading to hilarious “stoned grandad” moments, I have gotten my house into “this is good enough” shape for my sister and niblings to arrive. It’s been a lot, nothing resembles perfect and it’s fine. Now drink
December 22, 2025 at 10:49 PM
Despite my Dad not being able to help because of pain (which we are managing with edibles, leading to hilarious “stoned grandad” moments, I have gotten my house into “this is good enough” shape for my sister and niblings to arrive. It’s been a lot, nothing resembles perfect and it’s fine. Now drink
I’m a grown ass man and if I want the Baroness from GI JOE to be hiding in my Christmas tree, she damn well will be.
December 22, 2025 at 6:24 PM
I’m a grown ass man and if I want the Baroness from GI JOE to be hiding in my Christmas tree, she damn well will be.
does creaming your butter and sugar together really matter for cookies? Guess we’re gonna find out.
December 21, 2025 at 5:37 PM
does creaming your butter and sugar together really matter for cookies? Guess we’re gonna find out.
In the cold midwinter light of Sunday morning
IT'S STILL GOOD TO BE A BEARS FAN!!
OMFG! BEAR DOWN
IT'S STILL GOOD TO BE A BEARS FAN!!
OMFG! BEAR DOWN
a football player wearing a helmet with the letters gsr on it
ALT: a football player wearing a helmet with the letters gsr on it
media.tenor.com
December 21, 2025 at 3:06 PM
In the cold midwinter light of Sunday morning
IT'S STILL GOOD TO BE A BEARS FAN!!
OMFG! BEAR DOWN
IT'S STILL GOOD TO BE A BEARS FAN!!
OMFG! BEAR DOWN
