@djcali001.bsky.social
825 Forest Road (2025 - Bonus Feature): Fun Fact - When your movie takes a last minute swerve that was never setup and pays off absolutely nothing else in the film; it's not called a "twist" but is actually called "bad writing".
January 7, 2026 at 2:20 AM
825 Forest Road (2025 - Bonus Feature): Fun Fact - When your movie takes a last minute swerve that was never setup and pays off absolutely nothing else in the film; it's not called a "twist" but is actually called "bad writing".
Get Away (2024): Some films rely on the charm of their cast to carry them. This one puts a harness on that charm, cracks a whip, and desperately shouts "mush" all the way to the finish line.
#WeekendAtBjarnes
#WeekendAtBjarnes
January 7, 2026 at 2:12 AM
Get Away (2024): Some films rely on the charm of their cast to carry them. This one puts a harness on that charm, cracks a whip, and desperately shouts "mush" all the way to the finish line.
#WeekendAtBjarnes
#WeekendAtBjarnes
825 Forest Road (2025): The creepy mannequin that we never see move, or talk, or change facial expressions is somehow the most interesting character in the movie.Make of that what you will.
#HellHouseLlcLakeOfMelancholia
#HellHouseLlcLakeOfMelancholia
January 7, 2026 at 2:00 AM
825 Forest Road (2025): The creepy mannequin that we never see move, or talk, or change facial expressions is somehow the most interesting character in the movie.Make of that what you will.
#HellHouseLlcLakeOfMelancholia
#HellHouseLlcLakeOfMelancholia
Deadstream (2022): It's like a Sam Raimi tribute act read the Cliffs Notes of an A24 film... and I mean that in the best way possible.
#EvilDeadPoetsSociety
#EvilDeadPoetsSociety
January 7, 2026 at 1:37 AM
Deadstream (2022): It's like a Sam Raimi tribute act read the Cliffs Notes of an A24 film... and I mean that in the best way possible.
#EvilDeadPoetsSociety
#EvilDeadPoetsSociety
House on Eden (2025): Three real life YouTube "personalities" investigate a haunted house while failing to have any.
#LilithSnare
#LilithSnare
January 7, 2026 at 1:29 AM
House on Eden (2025): Three real life YouTube "personalities" investigate a haunted house while failing to have any.
#LilithSnare
#LilithSnare
The House on Mansfield Street (2018): 74 minutes in a haunted cottage with Captain Obvious.
#CaptainObviousAndTheSplitScreenOfPointlessness
#CaptainObviousAndTheSplitScreenOfPointlessness
December 22, 2025 at 12:33 AM
The House on Mansfield Street (2018): 74 minutes in a haunted cottage with Captain Obvious.
#CaptainObviousAndTheSplitScreenOfPointlessness
#CaptainObviousAndTheSplitScreenOfPointlessness
Werewolves Within (2021): A movie that ponders many things without ever really taking a stance on any of them. It's carried along by good acting, amiable but quirky characters, and not overstaying its welcome. Everything The Wolf of Snow Hollow tried to be but wasn't.
#ClawsOut
#ClawsOut
December 22, 2025 at 12:25 AM
Werewolves Within (2021): A movie that ponders many things without ever really taking a stance on any of them. It's carried along by good acting, amiable but quirky characters, and not overstaying its welcome. Everything The Wolf of Snow Hollow tried to be but wasn't.
#ClawsOut
#ClawsOut
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020): It turns out that shambling awkwardly between tones as opposed to careening between them doesn't make for a good story either. Then again this film has a 90% approval rating so what do I know?
#LeavingLosLobos
#LeavingLosLobos
December 22, 2025 at 12:08 AM
The Wolf of Snow Hollow (2020): It turns out that shambling awkwardly between tones as opposed to careening between them doesn't make for a good story either. Then again this film has a 90% approval rating so what do I know?
#LeavingLosLobos
#LeavingLosLobos
Ghost Stories (2017): It mistakes surface level symbology for thematic coherence and fires all of its most interesting narrative threads straight into the sun in favor of a twist ending unconnected to the rest of the movie that can only be called an ending because it's where the movie stops.
December 15, 2025 at 8:17 PM
Ghost Stories (2017): It mistakes surface level symbology for thematic coherence and fires all of its most interesting narrative threads straight into the sun in favor of a twist ending unconnected to the rest of the movie that can only be called an ending because it's where the movie stops.
7 Nights of Darkness (2011): We're expected to buy that six people who wouldn't win the casting call of a community theatre production of "Carrie: The Musical" are starring in a network reality show? Also there's something about ghosts being real, but I never got past the first thing.
#TheSlog
#TheSlog
December 8, 2025 at 2:34 AM
7 Nights of Darkness (2011): We're expected to buy that six people who wouldn't win the casting call of a community theatre production of "Carrie: The Musical" are starring in a network reality show? Also there's something about ghosts being real, but I never got past the first thing.
#TheSlog
#TheSlog
Fairhope Tower (2015): A horror movie that plays around with weighty subjects like domestic violence, self harm, and transgenerational trauma; not because it has anything to say about them, but because it desperately wishes it had something to say about anything.
#RequiemForATwist
#RequiemForATwist
December 8, 2025 at 1:46 AM
Fairhope Tower (2015): A horror movie that plays around with weighty subjects like domestic violence, self harm, and transgenerational trauma; not because it has anything to say about them, but because it desperately wishes it had something to say about anything.
#RequiemForATwist
#RequiemForATwist
The Crying Dead (2011):
Never in the field of human cinema have so many plot threads been dangled over so much runtime for so little result.
#TheGangThatCouldntShootTheirCamerasStraight
Never in the field of human cinema have so many plot threads been dangled over so much runtime for so little result.
#TheGangThatCouldntShootTheirCamerasStraight
November 22, 2025 at 2:33 AM
The Crying Dead (2011):
Never in the field of human cinema have so many plot threads been dangled over so much runtime for so little result.
#TheGangThatCouldntShootTheirCamerasStraight
Never in the field of human cinema have so many plot threads been dangled over so much runtime for so little result.
#TheGangThatCouldntShootTheirCamerasStraight
House of Bones (2010): Aside from Corin Nemec's character playing Entitled Star Buzzword Bingo as a he drives by the movie and waves to us, the characters are decent for this kind of thing. Unfortunately all that good will gets set ablaze to fuel the dumpster fire of an ending.
#ThisIsTheEndWeGuess
#ThisIsTheEndWeGuess
November 16, 2025 at 3:30 AM
House of Bones (2010): Aside from Corin Nemec's character playing Entitled Star Buzzword Bingo as a he drives by the movie and waves to us, the characters are decent for this kind of thing. Unfortunately all that good will gets set ablaze to fuel the dumpster fire of an ending.
#ThisIsTheEndWeGuess
#ThisIsTheEndWeGuess
Asylum the Lost Footage (2013):
Five random people randomly enter a random building, other random people say random things while the random people randomly jump cut around the building till a random entity kills them randomly.
#ThankfullyOverInSixtyMinutes
Five random people randomly enter a random building, other random people say random things while the random people randomly jump cut around the building till a random entity kills them randomly.
#ThankfullyOverInSixtyMinutes
November 14, 2025 at 10:11 PM
Asylum the Lost Footage (2013):
Five random people randomly enter a random building, other random people say random things while the random people randomly jump cut around the building till a random entity kills them randomly.
#ThankfullyOverInSixtyMinutes
Five random people randomly enter a random building, other random people say random things while the random people randomly jump cut around the building till a random entity kills them randomly.
#ThankfullyOverInSixtyMinutes
Found Footage (2016 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: If the movie was as subversive as it thinks it is we would have found out that Carl actually survived because he was the only one smart enough to leave the death cabin.
Fun Fact: If the movie was as subversive as it thinks it is we would have found out that Carl actually survived because he was the only one smart enough to leave the death cabin.
November 14, 2025 at 10:08 PM
Found Footage (2016 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: If the movie was as subversive as it thinks it is we would have found out that Carl actually survived because he was the only one smart enough to leave the death cabin.
Fun Fact: If the movie was as subversive as it thinks it is we would have found out that Carl actually survived because he was the only one smart enough to leave the death cabin.
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: The movie comes to a screeching halt around the halfway mark to stage a PSA regarding the dangers of inexplicably choosing to unpack your emotional trauma before actually making good your escape.
Fun Fact: The movie comes to a screeching halt around the halfway mark to stage a PSA regarding the dangers of inexplicably choosing to unpack your emotional trauma before actually making good your escape.
November 14, 2025 at 10:04 PM
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: The movie comes to a screeching halt around the halfway mark to stage a PSA regarding the dangers of inexplicably choosing to unpack your emotional trauma before actually making good your escape.
Fun Fact: The movie comes to a screeching halt around the halfway mark to stage a PSA regarding the dangers of inexplicably choosing to unpack your emotional trauma before actually making good your escape.
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Goofs: The movie mistakes a t-shirt slogan for a personality.
Goofs: The movie mistakes a t-shirt slogan for a personality.
November 14, 2025 at 9:57 PM
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Goofs: The movie mistakes a t-shirt slogan for a personality.
Goofs: The movie mistakes a t-shirt slogan for a personality.
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: The filmmakers are actually the first people on earth to have the insight that monologuing an exposition dump is actually a common response to trauma and therefore very, very believable when it happens in the movie.
Fun Fact: The filmmakers are actually the first people on earth to have the insight that monologuing an exposition dump is actually a common response to trauma and therefore very, very believable when it happens in the movie.
November 14, 2025 at 9:54 PM
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: The filmmakers are actually the first people on earth to have the insight that monologuing an exposition dump is actually a common response to trauma and therefore very, very believable when it happens in the movie.
Fun Fact: The filmmakers are actually the first people on earth to have the insight that monologuing an exposition dump is actually a common response to trauma and therefore very, very believable when it happens in the movie.
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: Introducing the protagonist 20 minutes into the movie was certainly a bold choice. Or did I mean dumb? I get those mixed up sometimes.
Fun Fact: Introducing the protagonist 20 minutes into the movie was certainly a bold choice. Or did I mean dumb? I get those mixed up sometimes.
November 14, 2025 at 9:51 PM
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: Introducing the protagonist 20 minutes into the movie was certainly a bold choice. Or did I mean dumb? I get those mixed up sometimes.
Fun Fact: Introducing the protagonist 20 minutes into the movie was certainly a bold choice. Or did I mean dumb? I get those mixed up sometimes.
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: It's not the cannibalistic-inbred-maybe-demons that made the cast trailer randomly disappear from the filming location as some have theorized. It was a much more fearsome entity: the movie's accountants.
Fun Fact: It's not the cannibalistic-inbred-maybe-demons that made the cast trailer randomly disappear from the filming location as some have theorized. It was a much more fearsome entity: the movie's accountants.
November 14, 2025 at 9:42 PM
The Lurking Fear (2023 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: It's not the cannibalistic-inbred-maybe-demons that made the cast trailer randomly disappear from the filming location as some have theorized. It was a much more fearsome entity: the movie's accountants.
Fun Fact: It's not the cannibalistic-inbred-maybe-demons that made the cast trailer randomly disappear from the filming location as some have theorized. It was a much more fearsome entity: the movie's accountants.
The Lurking Fear (2023): Have you heard the one where the Judgy One, the Single Minded Girlfriend One, and the Robert Davi one walk into a Lovecraft inspired scenario...
Oh, you're still here? Sorry, much like the movie that inspired it this post is all setup and no payoff.
#TheNeverEndingScaryStory
Oh, you're still here? Sorry, much like the movie that inspired it this post is all setup and no payoff.
#TheNeverEndingScaryStory
November 14, 2025 at 9:32 PM
The Lurking Fear (2023): Have you heard the one where the Judgy One, the Single Minded Girlfriend One, and the Robert Davi one walk into a Lovecraft inspired scenario...
Oh, you're still here? Sorry, much like the movie that inspired it this post is all setup and no payoff.
#TheNeverEndingScaryStory
Oh, you're still here? Sorry, much like the movie that inspired it this post is all setup and no payoff.
#TheNeverEndingScaryStory
Harland Manor (2021 - Alternate Cut):
Four believers go into a haunted house. Knowing looks are exchanged! Emotional baggage is unpacked! Ghosts quite literally strangle them! They are blasé! We are nonplussed.
Four believers go into a haunted house. Knowing looks are exchanged! Emotional baggage is unpacked! Ghosts quite literally strangle them! They are blasé! We are nonplussed.
November 14, 2025 at 9:04 PM
Harland Manor (2021 - Alternate Cut):
Four believers go into a haunted house. Knowing looks are exchanged! Emotional baggage is unpacked! Ghosts quite literally strangle them! They are blasé! We are nonplussed.
Four believers go into a haunted house. Knowing looks are exchanged! Emotional baggage is unpacked! Ghosts quite literally strangle them! They are blasé! We are nonplussed.
Harland Manor (2021 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: Apparently this movie was set on Opposite Day as every time a character says they are listening they very much aren’t.
Fun Fact: Apparently this movie was set on Opposite Day as every time a character says they are listening they very much aren’t.
November 14, 2025 at 8:59 PM
Harland Manor (2021 - Bonus Feature):
Fun Fact: Apparently this movie was set on Opposite Day as every time a character says they are listening they very much aren’t.
Fun Fact: Apparently this movie was set on Opposite Day as every time a character says they are listening they very much aren’t.
Legion (1998):
Outside the nostalgia factor of seeing avatars of both my childhood (Parker Stevens, Corey Feldman) and early adulthood (Terry Farrell) doing their best with the "dialogue"; the only memorable thing here was the Tubi ads trying to convince me that online Solitaire is a side hustle.
Outside the nostalgia factor of seeing avatars of both my childhood (Parker Stevens, Corey Feldman) and early adulthood (Terry Farrell) doing their best with the "dialogue"; the only memorable thing here was the Tubi ads trying to convince me that online Solitaire is a side hustle.
November 2, 2025 at 9:38 PM
Legion (1998):
Outside the nostalgia factor of seeing avatars of both my childhood (Parker Stevens, Corey Feldman) and early adulthood (Terry Farrell) doing their best with the "dialogue"; the only memorable thing here was the Tubi ads trying to convince me that online Solitaire is a side hustle.
Outside the nostalgia factor of seeing avatars of both my childhood (Parker Stevens, Corey Feldman) and early adulthood (Terry Farrell) doing their best with the "dialogue"; the only memorable thing here was the Tubi ads trying to convince me that online Solitaire is a side hustle.
Found Footage (2016): A competently made movie that mistakes lampshading for meta commentary.
#ChasingAmyIntoTheWoods
#ChasingAmyIntoTheWoods
November 1, 2025 at 12:14 AM
Found Footage (2016): A competently made movie that mistakes lampshading for meta commentary.
#ChasingAmyIntoTheWoods
#ChasingAmyIntoTheWoods