Lisa J. Féinics, PhD
@drfeinics.com
Neuroscience-trained IFC-certified resiliency coach and delusional optimist. Hard knocks grad & retired professor with a PhD in Neurobiology and Behavior. At the buffet of life, both hope and pessimism are served, but only hope is easy on the digestion.
I used to believe that if I worked harder and reached my goals, I would be happier. It turns out that the hard work isn't making yourself richer or respected by others, it's respecting and loving yourself no matter what. Happiness is about self-compassion, not imagined success. #resilience #hope
December 1, 2025 at 5:59 PM
I used to believe that if I worked harder and reached my goals, I would be happier. It turns out that the hard work isn't making yourself richer or respected by others, it's respecting and loving yourself no matter what. Happiness is about self-compassion, not imagined success. #resilience #hope
Making mistakes is part if life. If we were perfect already, there would be no reason to grow and improve. Like a finger over the lens, sometimes it takes awhile to see our mistakes and readjust focus. No need to live in chronic shame, own it, adjust, and move on. #hope #change #recovery #trauma
November 18, 2025 at 12:25 AM
One very strange thing about humans is their ability to think symbolically. We don't only see differences, we need to name and give them arbitrary meaning. Blue for boys and pink for girls--it's made up! Fighting over symbolism hurts us as a species. Food, shelter, safety, these matter. #it'sus
November 11, 2025 at 7:15 PM
One very strange thing about humans is their ability to think symbolically. We don't only see differences, we need to name and give them arbitrary meaning. Blue for boys and pink for girls--it's made up! Fighting over symbolism hurts us as a species. Food, shelter, safety, these matter. #it'sus
One blessing of growing up with learning difficulties is that you can be a great teacher. Needing to learn in a way different from others, means you can see and explain things in a new way. Find your strengths instead of focusing all your time on your weaknesses. #neurodiversity #hope #learning #joy
November 8, 2025 at 7:47 PM
One blessing of growing up with learning difficulties is that you can be a great teacher. Needing to learn in a way different from others, means you can see and explain things in a new way. Find your strengths instead of focusing all your time on your weaknesses. #neurodiversity #hope #learning #joy
When I was young, I imagined I would get my life together and everything would be perfect. What you don't realize in the bliss of youth, is that life is always coming together, and then, falling apart. Don't be too hard on yourself if it's not perfect right now. It's OK. #hope #joy #recovery #trauma
November 3, 2025 at 5:06 PM
When I was young, I imagined I would get my life together and everything would be perfect. What you don't realize in the bliss of youth, is that life is always coming together, and then, falling apart. Don't be too hard on yourself if it's not perfect right now. It's OK. #hope #joy #recovery #trauma
Life requires a lot of stitching along the way. Sometimes you think you have it all sewn together, but then some awful experience causes your life to come undone. That's OK. Who we are is a quilt of ugly patches and less than perfect stitches, which is unique and makes you, YOU. #hope #beauty
October 27, 2025 at 11:25 PM
Hi Again! Returning from a social media break.
When life gets too weighty, it's up to us to do what makes us feel lighter, without guilt or apology. Life burdens us without asking, but we feel we need permission to drop what weighs us down. Why?! Owning our power is not only possible, it's life.
When life gets too weighty, it's up to us to do what makes us feel lighter, without guilt or apology. Life burdens us without asking, but we feel we need permission to drop what weighs us down. Why?! Owning our power is not only possible, it's life.
October 24, 2025 at 9:51 PM
Hi Again! Returning from a social media break.
When life gets too weighty, it's up to us to do what makes us feel lighter, without guilt or apology. Life burdens us without asking, but we feel we need permission to drop what weighs us down. Why?! Owning our power is not only possible, it's life.
When life gets too weighty, it's up to us to do what makes us feel lighter, without guilt or apology. Life burdens us without asking, but we feel we need permission to drop what weighs us down. Why?! Owning our power is not only possible, it's life.
Needed a break from the news cycle. Nothing like a few days without any cell reception to get your head straight. There is a certain peace in nature that is incredibly healing. I know it's not everyone's thing to wake up at sunrise, but I do encourage giving it a try. #peace #healing #nature #sun
May 16, 2025 at 1:12 AM
We can be aware, admit the truth of situations, and still take care of our mental health. It's OK to permit ourselves sanctuary from time to time without total avoidance of reality. It is hard right now for many, and that's very real. Some days I want to fight, rage, cry, but life is more than that.
May 10, 2025 at 4:42 PM
We can be aware, admit the truth of situations, and still take care of our mental health. It's OK to permit ourselves sanctuary from time to time without total avoidance of reality. It is hard right now for many, and that's very real. Some days I want to fight, rage, cry, but life is more than that.
What do you see? Have you made assumptions? Fact: Both machines are broken. Invisible disabilities are like the machine on the right, folks keep trying to stuff things in, but some days the brain can't handle a full load. By refusing to accept differences in capacity, we create unneeded suffering.
May 5, 2025 at 6:32 PM
What do you see? Have you made assumptions? Fact: Both machines are broken. Invisible disabilities are like the machine on the right, folks keep trying to stuff things in, but some days the brain can't handle a full load. By refusing to accept differences in capacity, we create unneeded suffering.
Need a de-stressor? Unless you have a phobia of dogs, petting them has been shown to reduce the stress hormone cortisol and increase the love/bonding hormone oxytocin. I adopted both of these sweet boys as strays when I lived overseas. Bringing them back with me was worth every penny. #dogs #pets
April 29, 2025 at 4:50 PM
Been out this past week dealing with some personal challenges. It reminded me that most of us struggle in one way or another. Sadly, we are at a time when those with moderate privilege feel afraid of losing what they have and are conditioned by politicians to blame those with the least #privilege.
April 22, 2025 at 3:11 PM
Been out this past week dealing with some personal challenges. It reminded me that most of us struggle in one way or another. Sadly, we are at a time when those with moderate privilege feel afraid of losing what they have and are conditioned by politicians to blame those with the least #privilege.
There are days/weeks/months/years that just suck. The car breaks down, the kids get in trouble at school, the government goes insane, and you are too exhausted to care. Yet, one beautiful moment of kindness can reset us. If you have extra, be #kindness and #beauty today, someone needs you. #positive
April 17, 2025 at 7:28 PM
There are days/weeks/months/years that just suck. The car breaks down, the kids get in trouble at school, the government goes insane, and you are too exhausted to care. Yet, one beautiful moment of kindness can reset us. If you have extra, be #kindness and #beauty today, someone needs you. #positive
There is alone time, and there is all alone--balance is key. Living in a globalized world, we cannot expect to find only people like ourselves. When we put up too many barriers, we feel deeply alone. Spending too much or too little time alone prevents personal growth. #Embraceothers #balance #us
April 10, 2025 at 4:07 PM
There is alone time, and there is all alone--balance is key. Living in a globalized world, we cannot expect to find only people like ourselves. When we put up too many barriers, we feel deeply alone. Spending too much or too little time alone prevents personal growth. #Embraceothers #balance #us
It's not toxic to have hope. It's toxic to downplay others' suffering. Within ourselves, hope keeps us going. Like flowers in spring, and the leaves dropping in the fall, we too go through changes. We must understand disappointments don't last forever. Like seasons, we, and life, will change. #hope
April 5, 2025 at 10:23 AM
It's not toxic to have hope. It's toxic to downplay others' suffering. Within ourselves, hope keeps us going. Like flowers in spring, and the leaves dropping in the fall, we too go through changes. We must understand disappointments don't last forever. Like seasons, we, and life, will change. #hope
Why do we care so much about what is going on inside other people's castles? Looking at others, we miss the war or joy inside our own walls. Excess focus on others is a way to avoid our own inner demons; or, if envy, it causes us to hate what is good in our own lives. Transform you first. #me #self
March 27, 2025 at 11:40 AM
No matter how beautiful the exterior there is no peace if a storm rages inside. Protect your inner peace by refusing to let others steal your calm. Those who wish you harm want to see you suffer, don't give them the satisfaction. Avoid haters, or calmly say, "interesting" and go on your way. #peace
March 23, 2025 at 12:05 PM
No matter how beautiful the exterior there is no peace if a storm rages inside. Protect your inner peace by refusing to let others steal your calm. Those who wish you harm want to see you suffer, don't give them the satisfaction. Avoid haters, or calmly say, "interesting" and go on your way. #peace
Without diversity there would be no artists. Without art, the soul withers and life leaves a stale taste on the lips. We are not all the same, nor were we ever meant to be. If you seek only sameness, you may feel more secure, but the heart's flame dies. Don't tame the heart, let it burn fearfully.
March 19, 2025 at 5:45 PM
Without diversity there would be no artists. Without art, the soul withers and life leaves a stale taste on the lips. We are not all the same, nor were we ever meant to be. If you seek only sameness, you may feel more secure, but the heart's flame dies. Don't tame the heart, let it burn fearfully.
Is this a dangerous road to nowhere or an opportunity to explore the unknown? Natural risk-takers will see an adventure, while those who like security will see too much risk. Both approaches have value as long as you can remain flexible. Flexibility = greater happiness. #joy #opprtunity #happylife
March 13, 2025 at 11:46 AM
Is this a dangerous road to nowhere or an opportunity to explore the unknown? Natural risk-takers will see an adventure, while those who like security will see too much risk. Both approaches have value as long as you can remain flexible. Flexibility = greater happiness. #joy #opprtunity #happylife
We seem to have forgotten history around the rise of abusers of power like Franco, Stalin, Lenin, Hitler, Pol Pot, etc. It's a stressful time in the resurgence of hate against anyone deemed different. This hate is draining us. As we rise to face it, we must care for ourselves. #Good #hope #fun #pets
February 26, 2025 at 3:46 PM
We seem to have forgotten history around the rise of abusers of power like Franco, Stalin, Lenin, Hitler, Pol Pot, etc. It's a stressful time in the resurgence of hate against anyone deemed different. This hate is draining us. As we rise to face it, we must care for ourselves. #Good #hope #fun #pets
It's normal to feel stressed and afraid during times of uncertainty and upheaval. Remember that, just like a burning fire, changes can lead to something beautiful and spur new growth. Suffering can't last forever, so let's seek out the good in life and keep moving forward. #hope #findjoy #fightfear
February 24, 2025 at 2:57 AM
It's normal to feel stressed and afraid during times of uncertainty and upheaval. Remember that, just like a burning fire, changes can lead to something beautiful and spur new growth. Suffering can't last forever, so let's seek out the good in life and keep moving forward. #hope #findjoy #fightfear
When being hopeless seems like the right choice, remember, ugliness in the outer world does not have to become our inner world too. Hope shines within, it sustains us and keeps us whole. Hope is not toxic positivity, it's belief in the GOOD as well as the bad. Get inspired and change the view. #hope
February 19, 2025 at 6:30 PM
When being hopeless seems like the right choice, remember, ugliness in the outer world does not have to become our inner world too. Hope shines within, it sustains us and keeps us whole. Hope is not toxic positivity, it's belief in the GOOD as well as the bad. Get inspired and change the view. #hope
Cognitive Distortion: Mental Filtering is ignoring the positive and focusing on the negative. When there is fog, we might focus only on our fear about what we cannot see. Yes, there could be danger, but the fog might conceal a safe harbor too. Readjusting our perspective can bring #hope and #joy.
February 13, 2025 at 2:02 AM