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Wintzards of the Coast

@drilmagic.bsky.social

4.2K followers 52 following 390 posts

parody account putting @dril tweets on Magic cards

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Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 8h

Ravenous Baboons: having to spell the word "lunch" instead of saying it so the boys don't get too excited

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 1d

Traveling Botanist: im thinking the next big industry is dog humanization services. surgery to make dogs look like a man, stand upright, etc. its what they want

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 5d

Ajani, Nacatl Avenger: "horny" has killed more people than all the volcanos on earth combined

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 6d

Chain Reaction: "this is going to sound so cool" i rev the engine and it explodes, leaving me rolling around on the road with a smouldering dick & ass crack

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 7d

Reject Imperfection: looking how to become more cyber

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 8d

Barrage Ogre: 100% body fat, 49 year old, normal Male. good at turning purple while lifting boulders and dropping them in ex-wife's driveway. Army strong

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 9d

Rapid Hybridization: how do i morph

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 10d

Mocking Sprite: i respect youir beliefs so much (jack off motion) theres no possible way your opinion can totally suck me Hard

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 11d

Dryad of the Ilysian Grove: they are trying to make the 2020s the decade of Nude

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 12d

Spider-Verse: "multi verse" fuck your self. you`re only allowed to have one universe per costumed dipshit. absolutely none of this is my problem

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 13d

Tragic Poet: "buckwild" or "hogwild"?? im writing a poem for my gf

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 14d

Tidal Force: i was bullied and tortured at school because i was the only kid with a waterbed. so i got surgery and became a waterbed. suck my cock trolls

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 15d

Agoraphobia: i go outside for the rfirst time in 7 years and a biplane immediately shoots a chemtrail at my dick and makes it 2 inches shorter. typical

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 16d

Elusive Tormentor: who the fuck is scraeming "LOG OFF" at my house. show yourself, coward. i will never log off

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 17d

Sonic Assault: (plays some Tchaikovsky records at the highest possible volume) ah it sucks ass. but my IQ is increasing so much

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 18d

Miasmic Mummy: you say you smoke two packs a day? two packs of what, pal? shit?

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 19d

Falco Spara, Pactweaver: my friend the only crypto currency you wanna get your hands on is this: bird seed. There is a lot of birds and they all gotta eat

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 22d

Hound Tamer: i would not discount pua techniqes just b/c girls are wise to them now. for instance,w. a few modifications i can use them to rear pit bulls

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 23d

Thirst for Knowledge: to my mates online: im raising $1900 so i can drink a ton of olive oil to see if it turns to shit when i shit it out or just stays olive oil

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 24d

Force Void: i consider protected, locked accounts, to be the most Powerful accounts... for it is they who have Blocked the entire world

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 25d

Recruit the Worthy: a cool prank is to convince someone to join the Armed Forces and watch them get spooked by guns & missiles in exchange for hollow gratitude

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 26d

Psychic Possession: the human mind... perhaps the most powerful weapon. second only to the "GUN"

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 27d

Deadly Designs: were at the point now, folks, twhere the CIA will kill you for having Opinions, but refuse to assassinate the nitwits who fuck with my Page.

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 28d

Spontaneous Combustion: sorry. i can't come to work today because my fat little penis got blown off by a stick of TNT , in the war we just lost because of me .

Wintzards of the Coast @drilmagic.bsky.social · 29d

Dark Ritual: me & the boys will be holding hands., forming a Covenant Ring, to protest girls who only want to fuck the main pirate from the pirate movies