мɑгκ
@drumrollplease.bsky.social
4.5K followers 1.4K following 3.7K posts
🎃🖖🏻✊🏻🌈 ᑢᕼᎥ
Posts Media Videos Starter Packs
drumrollplease.bsky.social
Who is paying her to make music—that’s what I want to know, Jimmy.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
I was this summer years old when I found out Torn was a cover.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
What in the 2001 is this.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
I printed a sticker for my debit card as a reminder to spend responsibly.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
This was easily the best choice I made today.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
Doing my damndest to enjoy October despite being aware of facts and information.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
Fair, but I’m not sure these are the troops you send to storm beaches.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
Early morning runs hit different when the neighborhood’s full of Halloween decorations.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
Knock ‘em dead, but sell ‘em shirts first.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
That’s it, you’re done.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
We live in a fragile world. Protect Dolly Parton at all costs.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
For a lawyer, Pam Bondi seemed shocked by how hearings work.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
At least you're coping with that irritation in a healthy way.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
I put on a hoodie I haven't worn since last year and found $40 in the pocket. Finally—generational wealth!
drumrollplease.bsky.social
So come up to the lab and see what's on the slab.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
The sign you were waiting for.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
A dozen, a hundred, it's impossible to tell.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
And if you’ll look at the monitor, you’ll see we’ve once again arrived at Monday—thanks to the capitalist time loop we appear to be trapped in.
drumrollplease.bsky.social
I always seem to see them early in the day and think, "Fine, I’ll go for that jog at lunch—the bastard."
drumrollplease.bsky.social
Do you know how a pirate asks someone out on a date? “Aaaaaargh ya free Friday night?”