Tonight, my spouse declared our cat the chairman of the Ways and Toe Beans Committee. How are you?

Every time I eat a cotton candy grape I am again aghast at the shitty grapes of yore.

I just saw hors d'oeuvres spelled as horderves and that might as well happen.

Our cat gets “special night-night time” with lots of pets when I go to bed and now she purrs when I get undressed and it’s super awkward.