I know today is a good day when I’m dressed as the butchest lesbian Twitter can handle before getting scared

why can cishet men lie put “entrepreneur” in their bio but literally anyone else tell the truth and proudly share they’re smart, funny, hot, or talented with out the humility police coming after them

This is really unfair to everyone who just voted for him for the racism.

is this a safe space to say that the more expensive eggs have gotten the more I understand the nuance behind beans on toast

my new journal is extremely dainty considering it’s my comedy journal

i’m so bad at being nosy. i totally relate to the unreliable town crier character trope that creates the central plot’s Big Misunderstanding in a Shakespeare play

i will not stop ignoring duolingo notifications until that bird’s headshot on the app on my home page is a rotting skeleton

good afternoon, today i’m grateful lady gaga is referencing born this way & ARTPOP