I am such a sweetheart AND a huge bitch AND a dumbass AND a genius 🥰& I think I should be rewarded for not being worse✨

Fuck guns, give the True Detective ladies a gallon of salt and some holy water to patrol the mean streets of Ennis cause these dead people are acting UP

Today in yer cool rich aunt: carpet installation in the media room over the garage. Chosen based on how nice it feels on the bare feeties. Will go great with the Eames chair!!!!!

the one word every woman wants to hear

There is something so nefarious about grown women wearing smocking dresses. Something so “goo goo gaga I’m baby” in the worst way. Like if we don’t convince the men we’re little girls they’re going to file for divorce

I am not a faerie smut kind of girl and yet here I am on God’s green earth at 9 AM reading about a guy with wings railing a lady who got baptized in a big iron pot and now has superpowers