This thread brought to you by being on too many search committees and being tired of having my time wasted. I'm more angry at the candidate's advisor(s), who likely never told them this, thinking it's "obvious" or "back in my day we didn't have Zoom interviews..."

Basically: do your homework and think through how *this job* and not just *any job* is right for you. If you can't be bothered to do that, will you even be able to write a grant proposal?

Finally: you don't know what it's like here. Ask questions! Be curious! Show you're interested!

There is no notion of "safety school". If you sound like you'd take an offer while holding your nose, it will be pretty clear.

It's also clear if you try obvious/trite hyperbole: "I want to come because you are a world-class institution!"

This is not saying that if you have reasons you don't want to disclose (e.g. partner has a job in the area, a.k.a. the "two body problem" [this term is dumb, stop using it!]) you should reveal them. But if you say something super generic it will sound like you already think we are mid.

My department is definitely not top-10 in the rankings. We also don't have a ton of resources for on-campus interviews.

If you are not actually serious about accepting an offer, we won't bother interviewing you. There are tons of excellent candidates.

But how does my new mayor feel about zoning for combination pizza hut and taco bells?

I didn't even graduate that long ago (2008) and when I heard this was the norm in some fields I was horrified.

I would argue that this is also now true of (wireless) communication technologies. Like plumbing in that way.

Does that make the OpenAI erotic chatbots... metrosexual?

The line between satire and reality has blurred even further

There is a lovely set of choral pieces by Britten, the flower songs, and The Evening Primrose is a balm:

youtu.be/fCEr1tIvDe4?...

The scansion doesn’t work for singing it to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody.

Really sad to hear about their recent fire!