Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 14h

As St. Thomas Aquinas wisely reminds us, "the husband is bound to pay the debt to his wife, in matters pertaining to the begetting of children".

i.e. you gotta get it done my dude.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 1d

Alien in Athens -
existentialcomics.com/comic/623

Aliens in Athens

A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

existentialcomics.com

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 4d

I absolutely loath microwaves that have a setting for "power level". What kind of sicko doesn't want to always crank that thing to the max??

We be shouldn't designing our appliances for sickos.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 5d

Life has too many repetitive fetch quests.

How many times are they going to give me basically the exact same mission to bring back various items from the grocery store?? Boring.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 7d

If someone says they are serving in the military, you should not say:
"Thank you for your service!!"

You should say instead:
"Are you willing to obey a direct order to turn your guns on American citizens to squash the political opposition of a fascist?"

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 8d

So many sitcoms in the 80s and 90s could never be made today (not because of woke or anything, but because like half the jokes are about answering machines, and everyone has cell phones now)

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 8d

The Three Wise Men -
existentialcomics.com/comic/622

The Three Wise Men

A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

existentialcomics.com

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 10d

If I were president of the United States I would cut the military budget entirely (no one is going to invade us, come on).

Then I would give all that money to NASA to create rings like Saturn has around the earth. That would be awesome. Way better than whatever the military does now.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 12d

The Greeks, imaging the king of the Gods, the greatest of all possible beings: "he is a huge jacked dude who fucks absolutely everyone constantly. also he shoots lightning."

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 14d

And right before God sent us all to hell he'd be like "yeah that's right I created the dinosaur bones already old to fool smart people into not believing in me, didn't see that coming did you, science nerds!! Rigged up radiocarbon dating too! Lol."

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 14d

I almost wish the Rapture would happen just to see the look on Richard Dawkins' dumb face.

Sure it would mean I'm going to hell too or whatever happens, but still...pretty funny.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 15d

Occam's Razors
existentialcomics.com/comic/621

Occam's Razors

A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

existentialcomics.com

7 33 140

Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 16d

Men only want two things and it's disgusting (scores and highlights).

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 17d

The idea that Jesus Christ would want America to be for white people only has got to be one of the more bizarre ideas ever conceived, and yet is apparently widely believed.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 20d

Yes that's right. If you don't also follow me on Mastodon you will be missing out on absolute top shelf linux jokes.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 21d

Yeah, blame really goes to his father, Accounts Payable, for naming him that way.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 21d

Credit to @theresthistory.bsky.social by the way for this fact.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 21d

In 1381 the Peasants' Revolt was the first attempt in England to overthrow feudalism and created a society among equals. The very first act of violence was against a tax collector named William Payable. As in his actual fucking name was "Bill Payable".

And I gotta say I want to punch that guy too.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 21d

This is like when Graham Linehan said that wokeness was so powerful that even his closest and oldest friends wouldn't go on record to say he wasn't a bigot lol.

Matt Binder @mattbinder.bsky.social · 21d

truly one of the most unintentionally funny things i've ever seen someone post online about themself

Colin Wright
@SwipeWright
X.com

Convincing my left-wing former close friends on
Facebook that Charlie Kirk wasn't a Nazi or a
fascist is completely futile because I can't even
convince them that I'M not a Nazi or a fascist, and
many have known me since early grade school.
1:20 PM • 9/15/25 • 850K Views

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 22d

I love Canadian accents. Everything exactly the same as American accents except one (1) vowel sound. That's how all accents should be. None of this fancy "non-rhotic dialects" or "t-glottalization".

Just copy paste everything except you say "aboot" instead of "about".

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 22d

Philosophy Vampires
existentialcomics.com/comic/620

Philosophy Vampires

A philosophy webcomic about the inevitable anguish of living a brief life in an absurd world. Also Jokes

existentialcomics.com

8 36 150

Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 23d

Too much of the media is focused on the shooter's motivations, background, and goals. Ultimately, who cares?

The media should be more focused on the fact that he wrote "if you read this, you are gay lmao" on the bullet casing, which is objectively the funniest thing ever left behind by an assassin.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 24d

Everyone talking about how leftists were gleeful about Charlie Kirk dying, but it's weird how no one is talking about how the right was…also gleeful.

When they post about how they finally get to take off the mask and destroy leftism – that is glee. That is them being very happy this happened.

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 24d

BREAKING: I have just received inside information that a copy of the Socratic dialogue "Protagoras" was found in the shooter's backpack. It is looking like the shooter may not have had a political motive after all, but was radicalized against Sophistry by Socrates.

Time to ban philosophy??

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Existential Comics @existentialcomics.com · 25d

If they do interview him though, it should be a very serious centrist lib and the interview should start with "you wrote a message on the bullet casing saying anyone who read it was gay? Is that some kind of joke to you? Do you think that's funny?"

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