If you don't know, look up what he was doing before he was a football coach!

streetclothes on the sideline now per Brice Marich

watching the radiation monitors as my coworker jumpscares me in a costume made entirely of green glow sticks

“If the fans can’t stand to watch me pitch, just go up and get a hot dog, or go in the kitchen for a sandwich. And, in 15, 20 pitches, it’ll be over.”

If you haven't run it yet and/or it's not in your planning: mgoblue.com/sports/2017/...

THEY LET YOU TOUCH THE BANNER

Since Michigan legalized mortar tubes, things haven't been the same. They've been better!

Bonus: nobody needs to go to Ohio and smuggle them back to the state

Ten minutes ago, I couldn't get the cap off my new syrup bottle to remove the seal. Grabbed a grippy thing, cap still wouldn't budge. Grabbed channel locks - cap came off. Next step would've been putting the syrup bottle into a bench vice.

I could've just poked a hole in the seal.

refugee.whiz

At the beginning of the game, I noticed that the radio feed was about ~20 seconds ahead of the TV feed. I thought you were reporting early that the final 3 went in!

For the record, I don't believe in karma, juju, or jinxes.

But... I could be wrong, and I needed to make sure! Go blue baby!

it would be funny if Michigan won

I've been laughing for five minutes at my answers to these, please post the results once it's over!

My house came with a reel mower, but the pawls were installed reverse so it would only cut walking backwards. Eight years after fixing that, the handle snapped clean off, which I fixed with a hose clamp until parts arrived.

Why yes, I'm still using the reel mower. It's still good, damnit!

For one of his recent shows, I wrote in one of the crowd-submitted rants. Not only did he close the show with it, I will forever know that I made Lewis Black laugh on stage.