4K collector protip: no matter how cheap it looks rn, DO NOT go for Terminator 2 until it’s redone properly, which is in the works currently.

(Also this might be wild but really early CG animated fare looks incredible in 4K— Shrek and FF: The Spirits Within are two of my favorite UHDs I own)

I’m pleasantly shocked whenever my French homies bring up Devil Story, still one of the king “nanars” (basically their sorta-equivalent-but-not-fully idea of “so bad it’s good”) over there

Growing up is realizing that vintage episode I drip was the absolute peak of fashion

And this is a big, big one that could have saved them— you wanna raise your fucking delivery fees to $10+ per order? Fine, but make non-tippers bear the brunt of it and incentivize people to tip more by lowering the fee if they do. You already keep that fee if the order gets cancelled so why not

in either of these cases Doordash does fuck all for us, sometimes they say they’ll keep that customer from one-starring us for whatever perceived slight we caused them, but 24 hours later, whoops, my customer rating is down four points

I don’t have any stories of that nature with terrible customers personally, but I do have a few rancid experiences like a head of a hospital wing getting close to physically assaulting me because the restaurant I delivered a catering order for *almost* forgot to include paper plates

Granted there are the occasional customers who frankly deserve harassment— you don’t have to go very far on the subreddits to find absolute creeps who beg dashers to come inside their apartment or hotel room for “reasons” (there are about as many stories of dashers being creeps too)

Those dashers have been largely driven to beg their customers for more money (which never works) and often harass their customers, which also tend to get exposed by customers on social media, further setting up the company’s poor public image (maybe you should stop favoring them for better orders)

and obviously *I’m* not going to because I’ve been in the game long enough to know he’s not the enemy. Nor will I actually say anything of the sort to him.

Meanwhile I have other, angrier dashers with less tenure than me (and higher acceptance rates) outright saying sentiments like that to my face

Before that system was implemented, whenever I’d talk to other dashers and they’d brag about their $60 tip on a catering order or whatever, my response was generally in the “hey that’s awesome” range. Now when a dude who smells like cigarettes tells me the same thing I wanna rob that motherfucker

For starters, when your dasher committees (which, unbelievably, is a thing they pretend to care about) unanimously tell you that the whole “priority program” walling off orders based on acceptance rate is a terrible fucking idea, listen to them

There were absolutely ways they could have maintained being a quality service and addressed issues like the massive food waste that non-tipped orders generate and they just failed to do any of it

That was true when I started working, still is now, and it is the one and only absolute constant they’ve always maintained

In all fairness there were always signs that this was coming. Doordash is infamous for hiding full amounts of tips from drivers until the delivery is actually completed. If you’ve wondered why your dasher seemed grumpy about your $50 order, it’s because they think they might only get $8 from you

Speaking of, should you go onto either of the big doordash subreddits (both loaded with experiences similar to my own), expect a lot of blue-checkmark types to whine at us to leave their favorite capitalists alone in the replies to our stories. Not to say there aren’t jackass dashers on there, but

Maybe one of you with stronger journalistic backgrounds than I could also take a peek into a story I saw floating around on the dasher subreddits for a while about a board member with a nasty public poker habit, which I can only assume company money went into. I’m alleging, but, people have said 😝

Tony Xu doesn’t get one of the largest CEO relief packages in recent memory in the face of massive corporate layoffs of their rEaL eMpLoYeEs without that happening. I can only imagine what his golden parachute will be the moment this shithole of a company goes chapter 11