Jordan 🫐
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freelancejo.bsky.social
Jordan 🫐
@freelancejo.bsky.social
I love otters and my daughter 🦦💚
🎙️Co-host of The Cinema Scoop podcast
https://open.spotify.com/show/4R3TSkwN4aDOONkp6tQFqD?si=1aA-r12wSguX7CyvCNYFSw
I feel an immense amount of shame for having this big of a crush on Jacob Elordi. It’s gotten to a point where he’s in my nightmares too. Not in a good way.
November 17, 2025 at 1:57 AM
Reposted by Jordan 🫐
June 7, 2025 at 5:55 AM
IM GOING GROCERY SHOPPING TOMORROW IM SO EXCITED
June 7, 2025 at 2:32 AM
Sometimes I doubt myself professionally and then I remember I taught myself HTML/CSS so I could personalize my Neopets profile and create a guild when I was 11. Always been That Bitch.
May 30, 2025 at 3:42 AM
I made the same joke with 5 different people separately today. Imagine the embarrassment of having to watch yourself retell the same joke 5 times.
May 9, 2025 at 2:19 AM
I finally had a comment on a TikTok pop off with 10k likes and I’m like, yall. This wasn’t even my best work. I’m funnier than this one. I swear.
April 29, 2025 at 5:41 PM
I would let Nathan Fielder unplug my life support. I would thank him. I’d sit up and go “Omg thank youuu that was like so nice of you, I couldn’t reach that far!” and then we’d have a cool conversation before I left this mortal coil.
April 29, 2025 at 12:59 AM
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Fuck me UP Mr. Coogler
April 23, 2025 at 3:23 AM
Hasan, AOC and Bernie are all in Vegas today and I’ll in Vegas tomorrow. Wtf why yall not waiting for me????
March 20, 2025 at 5:35 PM
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Get in loser, we're tanking the economy
March 11, 2025 at 9:08 PM
Did SZA really mean it when she said “better days comin for sho” cause…when?
February 26, 2025 at 9:58 PM
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I hope America is as lucky as the delta jet - everyone survives but the right wing explodes
February 18, 2025 at 3:49 PM
Can someone find me a Mew and Mewtwo edit to Girl So Confusing? I need to see something
February 15, 2025 at 11:59 PM
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Snoop and Tom Brady: say no to hate

Kendrick: actually
February 10, 2025 at 1:51 AM
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Gaga dropping recession pop, MAGA calling Kendrick satanic, gay people visible and loud at the Grammy’s???

Oh this counter-culture shift is going to be DELICIOUS.
February 10, 2025 at 2:22 AM
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Kendrick certainly just made all the worst people in this country mad, so that’s some nice icing on the cake
February 10, 2025 at 1:49 AM
I washed my hair, made myself a Diet Coke with tiny-ice and half a lime, started a movie, stepped outside for a second. It’s a beautiful evening.
February 2, 2025 at 3:07 AM
It’s Friday ayyyy time to get freakyyyyyy! (Watch some mail-order dvds I rented and cook a nice meal)
January 31, 2025 at 3:25 PM
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CRIMSON TIDE: Bomb dangerous

ARMAGEDDON: Bomb useful

OPPENHEIMER: Sad I made bomb

TWIN PEAKS: Humanity's hubris in invoking the cataclysmic existential threat of atomic bombs unleashed a malevolent multiversal entity able to inhabit the inner voids a refusal to acknowledge our complicity created
January 25, 2025 at 6:15 PM
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I asked RFK Jr. a simple question:
January 29, 2025 at 7:32 PM
In honor of David Lynch, this week, I’m going to try to find out if I’m connected to the moon.
January 22, 2025 at 6:02 PM
My four year old daughter calls Cheetos “Muhcheetos” implying they are her Cheetos. We now all call them Muhcheetos.
December 2, 2024 at 6:25 PM
No one follows me here but I just wanted to say today is my sister’s Trans Anniversary and I am so so proud of her for going on this journey. I’m so happy to be in her life. I love her more than I could ever say.
November 21, 2024 at 10:53 PM