You guys don't understand how cool she is: everyone should date my girlfriend

The more I scroll the less I understand what anyone is doing here. Help me, Twitterheads. What are we getting out of this?

Anyone have advice for what to do when your feed is so frogsbreath you can't even find anything good to reward?

Contrary to popular belief, there are only four kinds of bats.

I never joined Twitter and I just got here so forgive me for being the last to learn the basics. Can anyone please explain to me:

Why are we doing this? Every time I post I'm scared someone I know will see it. What's the point?

Did you know that by substituting your morning coffee with green tea, you can eliminate up to 93% of what little joy you have left?

I asked for one opening shift a week, which means once I week I get to drink delicious espresso in the morning and feel amazing✨

I asked for one open a week at work, and I'm resultantly exhausted and miserable one morning a week

Bluesky wants me to like ten posts so it can learn what I like. I hope its algorithm is jotting down how long it's taking to find 10 likables. I need someone to follow!

Joining a new app means training a new algorithm, and it's exhausting. I said I like animals, not pictures of cats. I said I like culture, not that I still think Harris still has a chance.