Gemma
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gemmagolland.bsky.social
Gemma
@gemmagolland.bsky.social
Gimme a sec to think of what to put here
Every year I go to a curry house called Yak & Yeti for my birthday. It’s less birthday and more a chance for the gang to meet up after new years, and I love it. I also get gifts, which is banging.
January 10, 2025 at 9:21 PM
Just bought our world book day costumes off vinted. One daughter wanted to be Alice in wonderland. The other wanted to be an Oompa Loompa. Very different kids.
February 3, 2024 at 2:36 PM
Mike [to daughters]: do you know what a baby sheep is called?

Judy[with her stammer]: Ah…ah…ah…UGLY!!

Perfect timing and delivery. Absolute joker, this one.
September 21, 2023 at 5:49 PM
“When I grow up, I want to be a cat! Just a long cat.” - my kid (T)
September 21, 2023 at 6:51 AM
I don’t know how I’m supposed to just continue my normal life after the #ofmd teaser. Wedding cake toppers?!!! HE PAINTED THE BRIDE TO LOOK LIKE HIM???
August 31, 2023 at 4:34 PM
10 tv shoes to get to know me:

Buffy the vampire slayer
Gilmore girls
Frasier
Our flag means death
Good omens
What we do in the shadows
Parks and recreation
Bluey
Glee
Ted lasso
August 13, 2023 at 7:33 AM
Why does every good film from my childhood that I’ve chosen to share with my daughters involve a dead mother. Why do filmmakers love killing mothers.
August 9, 2023 at 9:31 AM
One of my almost-3-year-old twins is going through this months long “phase” where I have to go through some kind of 2-hour occult ritual every night in order to get her to sleep. Stories, songs, skin to skin contact, soft tickles on her arms/belly/back/face, handholding.

She will sleep for 4 hours.
August 6, 2023 at 7:05 PM
I was so prepared to love the Barbie movie, but I was still fizzing from the Good Omens S2 finale and it just didn’t have a chance. 🪽
August 4, 2023 at 7:17 AM