A transcript from a phone call at 10:33PM from my boyfriend that woke me up:
Me *obviously just woke up*: “hello, are you okay?”
Jack: “oh I’m sorry. Yeah I’m okay. I just wanted to tell you I got a rootbeer float and it’s so good.”
Me *obviously just woke up*: “hello, are you okay?”
Jack: “oh I’m sorry. Yeah I’m okay. I just wanted to tell you I got a rootbeer float and it’s so good.”
April 30, 2025 at 3:43 PM
A transcript from a phone call at 10:33PM from my boyfriend that woke me up:
Me *obviously just woke up*: “hello, are you okay?”
Jack: “oh I’m sorry. Yeah I’m okay. I just wanted to tell you I got a rootbeer float and it’s so good.”
Me *obviously just woke up*: “hello, are you okay?”
Jack: “oh I’m sorry. Yeah I’m okay. I just wanted to tell you I got a rootbeer float and it’s so good.”
“You” naming the new strong female lead “Bronte” makes me want to slam my head through a wall
April 26, 2025 at 3:20 PM
“You” naming the new strong female lead “Bronte” makes me want to slam my head through a wall
Jorgeous and Ginger are the new Jujubee
April 23, 2025 at 4:16 PM
Jorgeous and Ginger are the new Jujubee
Standing next to a woman who is screaming at the best buy geek squad because they told her it would take 3 days to fix her laptop. Meanwhile I apologized to them for breaking my computer and they said “why are u apologizing to us”
April 18, 2025 at 7:01 PM
Standing next to a woman who is screaming at the best buy geek squad because they told her it would take 3 days to fix her laptop. Meanwhile I apologized to them for breaking my computer and they said “why are u apologizing to us”
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Waking up with the same headache you went to sleep with is diabolical
April 11, 2025 at 3:01 PM
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Waking up with the same headache you went to sleep with is diabolical
The mushroom swiss burger is back for a limited time only and in other news I will be glutening myself purposefully for a limited time only
April 6, 2025 at 5:53 PM
The mushroom swiss burger is back for a limited time only and in other news I will be glutening myself purposefully for a limited time only
Do we all understand the definition of tariff now
April 4, 2025 at 2:10 PM
Do we all understand the definition of tariff now
When I’m in charge, everyone will be allowed to choose 1 week out of the month they can work in a fetal position no questions asked
April 3, 2025 at 3:03 PM
When I’m in charge, everyone will be allowed to choose 1 week out of the month they can work in a fetal position no questions asked
Spent all morning researching what bird was calling outside my window and turns out it’s a pigeon. hell ya keep on singin ya silly guy
March 31, 2025 at 4:31 PM
Spent all morning researching what bird was calling outside my window and turns out it’s a pigeon. hell ya keep on singin ya silly guy
Did I sneak away from my own birthday party to go sit with my cats? Ya
March 31, 2025 at 2:46 AM
Did I sneak away from my own birthday party to go sit with my cats? Ya
Opened my mouth to seem cool and said I played golf and now I’m signed up for the company golf tournament. googling how to get good at golf quick
March 28, 2025 at 1:31 PM
Opened my mouth to seem cool and said I played golf and now I’m signed up for the company golf tournament. googling how to get good at golf quick
Started Lost and have said “this happened in Yellowjackets already” as if this show didn’t premiere 17 years earlier
March 24, 2025 at 12:53 AM
Started Lost and have said “this happened in Yellowjackets already” as if this show didn’t premiere 17 years earlier
Walked outside for less than 5 minutes to check out garden lights Jack installed and got 16 mosquito bites! Spring has sprung!
March 19, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Walked outside for less than 5 minutes to check out garden lights Jack installed and got 16 mosquito bites! Spring has sprung!
Need a survivor version of untucked and it’s the jury discussing between tribal councils
March 16, 2025 at 6:28 PM
Need a survivor version of untucked and it’s the jury discussing between tribal councils
Pleakley should have been played by a drag queen in the live action stitch. Don’t erase that diva’s whole storyline
March 13, 2025 at 2:24 AM
Pleakley should have been played by a drag queen in the live action stitch. Don’t erase that diva’s whole storyline
Been clothes shopping for spain and told myself to escape my comfort zone but 4 of the 6 outfits so far are green so
March 13, 2025 at 12:10 AM
Been clothes shopping for spain and told myself to escape my comfort zone but 4 of the 6 outfits so far are green so
Doing yard work (picking up sticks and putting them in a pile so we can use them in our fire pit) and immediately started playing pretend survivor
March 10, 2025 at 12:36 AM
Doing yard work (picking up sticks and putting them in a pile so we can use them in our fire pit) and immediately started playing pretend survivor
Canceling my amc a-list membership because I no longer live near an amc felt like stabbing a friend in the back. nicole kidman forgive me
March 9, 2025 at 4:35 PM
Canceling my amc a-list membership because I no longer live near an amc felt like stabbing a friend in the back. nicole kidman forgive me
Coworker just went up to everyone and asked if we wanted to smell his bag of coffee and everyone said no
March 6, 2025 at 2:22 PM
Coworker just went up to everyone and asked if we wanted to smell his bag of coffee and everyone said no
Pirates of the Caribbean should have been a trilogy and that is how i choose to see it
March 2, 2025 at 11:27 PM
Pirates of the Caribbean should have been a trilogy and that is how i choose to see it
Started crying about how much i love doctor who tonight
February 27, 2025 at 4:41 AM
Started crying about how much i love doctor who tonight
Hey guys whatever you do don’t mispronounce something in a room full of all of your much older man coworkers
February 26, 2025 at 2:46 PM
Hey guys whatever you do don’t mispronounce something in a room full of all of your much older man coworkers
“My god” - jack in regards to the amount of ranch I just put on my salad
February 25, 2025 at 2:53 AM
“My god” - jack in regards to the amount of ranch I just put on my salad
My cat sneezes once and I’m immediately on google searching “cat sneeze what does it mean”
February 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
My cat sneezes once and I’m immediately on google searching “cat sneeze what does it mean”