finally back at work today. this has been my January:

i have been v sick for the last two weeks and left the house for the first time this morning (I don’t count the hospital lmao) and saw a fucking sheep in someone’s front yard

say what you will about duolingo but my wife and I sure get a lot of use out of the phrase “le chien est dans le jardin”

You’re telling me they made a real-life version of the setting of the critically acclaimed 2024 video game Like a Dragon: Infinite Wealth?

CES? YES.

happy new year to everyone except people who launch fireworks in their suburban backyard. my dog hates you

today i did the impossible. i received a christmas cracker gift that is actually useful

is uber trying to get me to assassinate another billionaire ceo

should I enter the lottery tonight y/n

sorry for everyone playing pokemon pocket but i already won