@gthotman.bsky.social
I did not actually go to rehab Kim Kardashian was holding me hostage to steal my BIG BUSH
October 17, 2025 at 4:43 AM
I did not actually go to rehab Kim Kardashian was holding me hostage to steal my BIG BUSH
Someone let me ride on a riding lawn mower JUST ONCE
September 29, 2025 at 2:23 PM
Someone let me ride on a riding lawn mower JUST ONCE
watching the girlfriend and I have never rooted for someone’s demise so hard
September 22, 2025 at 6:03 AM
watching the girlfriend and I have never rooted for someone’s demise so hard
hate to see a smile on his rotten face
September 13, 2025 at 6:12 AM
hate to see a smile on his rotten face
I have received TWO happys today
September 4, 2025 at 12:55 AM
I have received TWO happys today
Accidentally committed arson today
August 23, 2025 at 7:35 PM
Accidentally committed arson today
A restaurant stress dream but in the end I did everything right?
August 14, 2025 at 12:38 PM
A restaurant stress dream but in the end I did everything right?
Had to get sober bc I simply would not stop fucking uggos
August 10, 2025 at 6:21 AM
Had to get sober bc I simply would not stop fucking uggos
finally became the wholesome critter I’ve always wanted to be
August 3, 2025 at 4:20 AM
finally became the wholesome critter I’ve always wanted to be
I played mermaid so hard today
July 18, 2025 at 2:14 AM
I played mermaid so hard today
U guys will never guess what I’m cooking with tonight
July 15, 2025 at 12:48 AM
U guys will never guess what I’m cooking with tonight
Scallion pancake Sunday
July 13, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Scallion pancake Sunday
Having a summer fling with the heirloom tomatoes at the farmers market
July 12, 2025 at 3:48 AM
Having a summer fling with the heirloom tomatoes at the farmers market
Took the BEST ass pic last night it’s hard not to bless the world with it
July 7, 2025 at 2:32 PM
Took the BEST ass pic last night it’s hard not to bless the world with it
“you have the grace face of darkness on today”
July 4, 2025 at 4:36 PM
“you have the grace face of darkness on today”
HELP my old next door neighbor who gave me rides in high school appears to work at my new obgyn plz sir i do not want u looking at my cootie, we used to sell lemonade together
July 2, 2025 at 8:29 PM
HELP my old next door neighbor who gave me rides in high school appears to work at my new obgyn plz sir i do not want u looking at my cootie, we used to sell lemonade together
My villain origin story began when I didn’t get enough hugs and kisses when I cried
June 27, 2025 at 11:31 AM
My villain origin story began when I didn’t get enough hugs and kisses when I cried
i HATE a person who says the “all around you” thing in a theater. It fuels a level of rage equal to that of someone drinking my last dr pepper
June 21, 2025 at 3:08 AM
i HATE a person who says the “all around you” thing in a theater. It fuels a level of rage equal to that of someone drinking my last dr pepper
Actively sitting in bed pretending to vape, my last vice must go
June 20, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Actively sitting in bed pretending to vape, my last vice must go
Homemade peach sorbet with mint syrup and sugar cookie crumble CAME OUT SO GOOD HAD TO PULL OUT THE FINE CHINA
June 15, 2025 at 4:28 AM
Homemade peach sorbet with mint syrup and sugar cookie crumble CAME OUT SO GOOD HAD TO PULL OUT THE FINE CHINA