Hazel Murray
@hazelannmurray74.bsky.social
Old Scottish lady who has no filter, granny of two, mum of two, dog mummy of two, happiest when I am upcycling furniture and being left the fuck alone x
you are a fab parent, if you were Scottish that’s how it’s meant to be eaten…. With water and salt … yum x
January 23, 2026 at 7:15 PM
you are a fab parent, if you were Scottish that’s how it’s meant to be eaten…. With water and salt … yum x
This tickled me immensely and would 💯 get my business 👌 x
January 23, 2026 at 1:03 PM
This tickled me immensely and would 💯 get my business 👌 x
I would love to tell you it gets better…. It doesn’t x
January 22, 2026 at 5:39 PM
I would love to tell you it gets better…. It doesn’t x
What an arse! I remember reading that someone once tried to speak to him only to be ignored and told the man is off duty!
January 21, 2026 at 4:59 PM
What an arse! I remember reading that someone once tried to speak to him only to be ignored and told the man is off duty!
Chris kristofferson wrote his best songs while drunk or high! X
January 19, 2026 at 11:22 PM
Chris kristofferson wrote his best songs while drunk or high! X
Of course I did, I think I just said I wasn’t over an ex or something similar, the old it’s not you it’s me line.
January 18, 2026 at 10:12 AM
Of course I did, I think I just said I wasn’t over an ex or something similar, the old it’s not you it’s me line.
So scroll on by wonkish! It’s light hearted banter nothing more
January 18, 2026 at 7:27 AM
So scroll on by wonkish! It’s light hearted banter nothing more
1, I was responding to someone’s Fess!
2, you cannot see ovaries
3, It was 30 years ago and I liked a weighty testie 💁🏻♀️
2, you cannot see ovaries
3, It was 30 years ago and I liked a weighty testie 💁🏻♀️
January 18, 2026 at 7:24 AM
1, I was responding to someone’s Fess!
2, you cannot see ovaries
3, It was 30 years ago and I liked a weighty testie 💁🏻♀️
2, you cannot see ovaries
3, It was 30 years ago and I liked a weighty testie 💁🏻♀️
Mine are probably bigger snowflake
January 18, 2026 at 12:43 AM
Mine are probably bigger snowflake
Aww do you small balls too 🥰 it cannot be easy!
Seriously I replied to a post on someone’s reason for dumping someone with ONE of mine.. I also dumped someone because his dog was too big! Jeez Chill out dude
Seriously I replied to a post on someone’s reason for dumping someone with ONE of mine.. I also dumped someone because his dog was too big! Jeez Chill out dude
January 18, 2026 at 12:08 AM
Aww do you small balls too 🥰 it cannot be easy!
Seriously I replied to a post on someone’s reason for dumping someone with ONE of mine.. I also dumped someone because his dog was too big! Jeez Chill out dude
Seriously I replied to a post on someone’s reason for dumping someone with ONE of mine.. I also dumped someone because his dog was too big! Jeez Chill out dude
Too busy measuring testies x
January 18, 2026 at 12:02 AM
Too busy measuring testies x
It’s giving David Bellamy 🤣
January 17, 2026 at 11:55 PM
It’s giving David Bellamy 🤣
It was 30 years ago and he’s deed so! Who cares x
January 17, 2026 at 11:26 PM
It was 30 years ago and he’s deed so! Who cares x
I once dumped someone because his balls were too small.. forever known as spud nuts because they looked like little salad potatoes x
January 17, 2026 at 11:22 PM
I once dumped someone because his balls were too small.. forever known as spud nuts because they looked like little salad potatoes x
I feel so sad that you didn’t have that connection, I had two phenomenal dads, I realise I am very lucky, both gone now and their passing impacts me massively x
January 16, 2026 at 4:23 PM
I feel so sad that you didn’t have that connection, I had two phenomenal dads, I realise I am very lucky, both gone now and their passing impacts me massively x
I feel like David Bellamy when I go down on my husband…. Wading through the undergrowth x
January 7, 2026 at 9:13 PM
I feel like David Bellamy when I go down on my husband…. Wading through the undergrowth x
I would get rid of my husband over my rescue dogs any day of the week and he knows it x
January 6, 2026 at 11:26 PM
I would get rid of my husband over my rescue dogs any day of the week and he knows it x
We all have that one bowl 🤣🤣 x
January 2, 2026 at 1:21 PM
We all have that one bowl 🤣🤣 x
I was so glad when they took the mirrored floors out of the stand and tan beds 😳 x
December 22, 2025 at 5:53 AM
I was so glad when they took the mirrored floors out of the stand and tan beds 😳 x
I can 💯 relate to this, I also clean very late so none of the bastards are in the way or walk on my nice clean floors x
December 22, 2025 at 5:42 AM
I can 💯 relate to this, I also clean very late so none of the bastards are in the way or walk on my nice clean floors x
Brilliant! Definitely not boring x
December 19, 2025 at 10:37 PM
Brilliant! Definitely not boring x
Make her some vouchers, a meal out when you have money, a massage, you will do a days housework and cooking, make her a card, write a poem - trust me she will love it and she would much rather that than you stressing and putting yourself in debt for something she does not need! Vinted is also great
December 17, 2025 at 11:01 AM
Make her some vouchers, a meal out when you have money, a massage, you will do a days housework and cooking, make her a card, write a poem - trust me she will love it and she would much rather that than you stressing and putting yourself in debt for something she does not need! Vinted is also great
Matalan self service…. You are welcome 🤣 x
December 15, 2025 at 12:26 PM
Matalan self service…. You are welcome 🤣 x