i did my absolute fucking best.

i'm so sick of being continually hit with "well why didn't you do xyz" first of all. i had to put so much more effort into all of my thought processes. second of all you know how traumatic this was for me stop making me pick through this and just fucking believe me

and also i was afraid that telling the truth about how bad i was doing would lead to me losing my autonomy

making the script in your head and then forgetting the script by the time they pick up...bad. forget being on hold

throwing a like on my posts every few days isn't a response