the mock turtle
@iamtheturtle.bsky.social
How strange it is to be anything at all
People building quadcopters and flying them at night laughing their asses off at people who don't understand how big space is
December 13, 2024 at 2:41 PM
People building quadcopters and flying them at night laughing their asses off at people who don't understand how big space is
I gave all my stuff away to the poor once but that was only after the poor jumped me in an alley
November 30, 2024 at 4:42 PM
I gave all my stuff away to the poor once but that was only after the poor jumped me in an alley
Yes, the infamously communist country of Canada. The only thing that outnumbers Tim Hortons are all the Karl Marx statues
November 30, 2024 at 4:32 PM
Yes, the infamously communist country of Canada. The only thing that outnumbers Tim Hortons are all the Karl Marx statues
Hmm I wonder if he'll spring for the McRib or the Filet-o-Fish
November 30, 2024 at 4:29 PM
Hmm I wonder if he'll spring for the McRib or the Filet-o-Fish
Are these communists in the room with us right now
November 30, 2024 at 4:18 PM
Are these communists in the room with us right now
Hey god. I've just awoken from a week long bender and am disappointed to find that I wasn't able to drink myself into a 4 year coma just yet. Any suggestions? What was the ABV on that Cana wine I want to try it next.
November 29, 2024 at 7:30 PM
Hey god. I've just awoken from a week long bender and am disappointed to find that I wasn't able to drink myself into a 4 year coma just yet. Any suggestions? What was the ABV on that Cana wine I want to try it next.
Slow day at the lead taste testing factory?
November 26, 2024 at 1:27 PM
Slow day at the lead taste testing factory?
Damn it's almost like we should have primaried someone like this guy.
November 26, 2024 at 6:06 AM
Damn it's almost like we should have primaried someone like this guy.
I definitely noticed this by having my Teams and email open as soon as work started today and I'm absolutely not hearing about it now for the first time
November 25, 2024 at 6:09 PM
I definitely noticed this by having my Teams and email open as soon as work started today and I'm absolutely not hearing about it now for the first time
Yeah but do those cheaper prices come with a side of mass deportation, pain and suffering for others? If groceries were f'in free MAGA would simply complain about something else as their <insert minority here>phobic beard
November 25, 2024 at 4:41 PM
Yeah but do those cheaper prices come with a side of mass deportation, pain and suffering for others? If groceries were f'in free MAGA would simply complain about something else as their <insert minority here>phobic beard
Postponed until after his term != withdrawn. Although I applaud your noble, ongoing battle against understanding what simple English words mean. If you like I'll send over a dictionary for xmas, if you do a couple words a day by this time next year you might be close to the entry for 'braindead.'
November 22, 2024 at 4:48 PM
Postponed until after his term != withdrawn. Although I applaud your noble, ongoing battle against understanding what simple English words mean. If you like I'll send over a dictionary for xmas, if you do a couple words a day by this time next year you might be close to the entry for 'braindead.'
Can we go ahead and schedule this court date for January 21, 2029?
November 22, 2024 at 3:55 PM
Can we go ahead and schedule this court date for January 21, 2029?
Don't go now it's a big, black, 210-page heavy duty Swingline®
November 22, 2024 at 3:47 PM
Don't go now it's a big, black, 210-page heavy duty Swingline®
Hey you guys I think this guy needs some gay love he's feeling a little green rn, I gotchu boo come over here, daddy's here it's OK, don't worry that's just a stapler in my pocket
November 22, 2024 at 3:39 PM
Hey you guys I think this guy needs some gay love he's feeling a little green rn, I gotchu boo come over here, daddy's here it's OK, don't worry that's just a stapler in my pocket
He's just playing hard to get for that Monday Night Rehabilitation cabinet position
November 22, 2024 at 3:19 PM
He's just playing hard to get for that Monday Night Rehabilitation cabinet position
That article says they "made up laws" in the same way that it's a word for word copy/paste of the opening six chapters of Great Expectations. If Trump thinks he got boned, he's free to appeal! Although, if he doesn't like the feel of a courtroom bench I'd suggest he stop committing crimes!
November 22, 2024 at 3:02 PM
That article says they "made up laws" in the same way that it's a word for word copy/paste of the opening six chapters of Great Expectations. If Trump thinks he got boned, he's free to appeal! Although, if he doesn't like the feel of a courtroom bench I'd suggest he stop committing crimes!
Ohh, I see. Are these law changers in the room with us right now?
November 21, 2024 at 8:59 PM
Ohh, I see. Are these law changers in the room with us right now?
Pass the scooby snacks, my friend
November 21, 2024 at 7:05 PM
Pass the scooby snacks, my friend
Yeah, banging a porn star, lying about it, clumsily paying off said porn star, getting caught, committing a litany of financial crimes, getting caught again, stealing state secrets and refusing to return them, getting caught yet again... all very Mandela-esque. Almost the exact same person.
November 21, 2024 at 7:03 PM
Yeah, banging a porn star, lying about it, clumsily paying off said porn star, getting caught, committing a litany of financial crimes, getting caught again, stealing state secrets and refusing to return them, getting caught yet again... all very Mandela-esque. Almost the exact same person.
OK, bigoted slurs then. But let's be real, he's probably too busy giving some kid cancer to be posting anything rn 🤷♂️
November 21, 2024 at 6:56 PM
OK, bigoted slurs then. But let's be real, he's probably too busy giving some kid cancer to be posting anything rn 🤷♂️
I want to make a joke about this guy resembling personified heart disease but the Nahtzee talk about coming after those harboring people really kills the vibe. FFS this guy probably read Anne Frank and cheered when she was capt.... LMAO just kidding. We know these people don't read.
November 21, 2024 at 2:43 PM
I want to make a joke about this guy resembling personified heart disease but the Nahtzee talk about coming after those harboring people really kills the vibe. FFS this guy probably read Anne Frank and cheered when she was capt.... LMAO just kidding. We know these people don't read.
