CJ
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imoffthecouch.bsky.social
CJ
@imoffthecouch.bsky.social
🇮🇪🏳️‍🌈🍳♾ Level 42, Dublin-based writer. Late-diagnosed AuDHD, unmasked and turned into Oberyn Martell - pan, poly, bit slutty, hopefully without the gruesome exit. Owner of Baguette the mini sausage dog

https://linktr.ee/offthecouch
Early morning walk to clear the head. Reflecting on a really, really shit few weeks and how to move forward from here. Plans afoot!
July 18, 2025 at 6:28 AM
Baguette baking 🥖
July 15, 2025 at 10:44 AM
“Oi, gimme a bit of your succulent blueberry bun!”

#birdsofireland
June 1, 2025 at 9:10 AM
“What do you mean I need a bath?!”
April 28, 2025 at 4:55 PM
Baguette on her walkies up Killiney Hill 🐾

#dachshund
April 24, 2025 at 11:51 AM
MUM WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU RAN OUT OF TUNA?! 😮😱
April 11, 2025 at 11:51 AM
It’s Picky Bits for dinner weather! 🧀🫒🥨🍷
April 9, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Say no more mon amour… Happy Rex Manning Day!

And remember - we mustn’t dwell… (at least not today anyway)

#empirerecords #rexmanning
April 8, 2025 at 6:05 AM
Dun Laoghaire sunrise 🌅
April 7, 2025 at 5:23 PM
Ever get that feeling you’re being watched? 😅
April 3, 2025 at 8:56 AM
Baguette at the vet.. “noooooooo!”
March 31, 2025 at 3:01 PM
“Can’t you just be normal for once?!” I’m autistic, chronically ill, and a bit of a cunt. So… no.
March 31, 2025 at 9:41 AM
Sometimes I feel very sad that I didn’t know I’m autistic until the age of 40. Reading this is like reading about myself in many aspects. Bravo to Bella for their decision to talk about their diagnosis openly 💕

www.vogue.co.uk/article/bell...
“There’s No Reason For People Not To Know”: Bella Ramsey Opens Up About Their Liberating Autism Diagnosis & The Epic New Season Of ‘The Last Of Us’
“The label of being autistic has been so helpful to me because that’s helped me to understand myself, but gender and sexuality-wise, labels do not feel comfy for me in any capacity, because I feel lik...
www.vogue.co.uk
March 19, 2025 at 9:50 PM
Please tell me there was something else in that shamrock bowl
March 14, 2025 at 4:36 AM
Dublin you’re only gawjus, but could we have just a little less cloud please 🙏

#dublin
March 13, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Baguette would like to remind you all that she thinks baths are bullshit, and that it must be some other dog that “smells like a popcorn factory”.
March 12, 2025 at 8:29 AM
If you’re “Irish-American” and you voted for Trump, you’re not Irish. And don’t even think about ever visiting Ireland, not that you would cos you’re a knuckle-dragger that doesn’t own a passport.
March 8, 2025 at 11:28 AM
Me: *Gets into bed, shuts eyes*
Brain: “My….”
Me: Shhhhhh!
Brain: “My love has…”
Me: Damnit shut up!
Brain “My love has got no money, he’s got his… dungarees? Trampolines?”
Me: Fucks sakes! *Opens phone*
March 6, 2025 at 9:15 PM
Baguette waking up in the morning, when she finds out he still isn’t dead yet.
March 1, 2025 at 12:24 PM
Nooooooo not down CJ’s toilet, they flush Baguette’s poops down in here 😱

Donald, that’s all you’re good for 🚽🧽
February 27, 2025 at 5:21 PM
Well fuck you raised brain pressure & back pain, cos I just wrote an entire article in one go, on my phone no less 😅 And I’m gonna be submitting it EARLY.

So haha to you too ADHD! (But also no, cos my brain will do absolutely no braining tomorrow after this small window of writing of wordage!)
February 26, 2025 at 2:32 PM
Baguette cuddles! 🥰
February 21, 2025 at 6:53 PM
After 10 days of zero sunshine, Dun Laoghaire delivered! ☀️

#dublin
February 21, 2025 at 12:26 PM
If I was a bird and wanted feeding, I’d also park myself right by the fish n chips van with my beak open 🐦
February 20, 2025 at 7:40 PM
Please can we stop editing the faces of women 40+ to beyond recognition? Besides the fact that Julia Stiles is damn stunning just as she is, this level of editing is ridiculous.
February 20, 2025 at 2:23 AM