Well I hope you have learned a valuable lesson about…*checks notes* not…psychically preventing gun violence through…hyper-vigilance?

This entire article was next-level insane. Just terrifying.

I’m always saying this

To be fair, if the term existed in Elizabethan England, the actual William Shakespeare would have been ALL OVER it.

I’m so sorry Sara. You deserved and deserve so much better

Omg this is so cool!!!! Thank you for making it and for sharing!

Thank you for sharing it!

Wait this is actually so lovely and beautiful I’m tearing up

Reminds me of this (likely apochryphal but) amazing autocorrect prank:

Omg the ultimate jump scare

Oh that’s really wonderful!!

“Imagine hell.”

“I am so #humbled and #honored to have been selected to receive the prestigious ‘Golden Shower’ award. This shows the power of #vulnerability, which as they taught me at my business school ‘just outside of Boston,’ is one of the four Pillars of Subspace, which…”

You just KNOW that Elon decided that this would *increase* engagement on twitter, and that he’s a genius for thinking of it, and none of his henchmen were willing to tell him the obvious truth…

This reminds me of the time I spent 30 minutes in a J. Crew dressing room trying to get out of a romper I had tried on…

Shirley you must be joking.