Jake Noll
@jakersnoll.bsky.social
Comedian - Writer - Actor
L.A. based transgender problem child 🏳️⚧️🦎🪰🪳
L.A. based transgender problem child 🏳️⚧️🦎🪰🪳
My bug out bag is a body bag.
February 9, 2025 at 2:02 AM
My bug out bag is a body bag.
Great. So the Kennedy Center will now absolutely have a Kid Rock residency.
February 8, 2025 at 6:37 AM
Great. So the Kennedy Center will now absolutely have a Kid Rock residency.
Reposted by Jake Noll
Yes, this administration is dangerous and cruel, but they are also shockingly dim and incompetent.
Opportunities are everywhere.
Make everything as hard as possible. Resist every demand. Refuse entry without a warrant. Don’t take the buyout. Their problem solving skills are 📉
Opportunities are everywhere.
Make everything as hard as possible. Resist every demand. Refuse entry without a warrant. Don’t take the buyout. Their problem solving skills are 📉
January 30, 2025 at 2:35 AM
Yes, this administration is dangerous and cruel, but they are also shockingly dim and incompetent.
Opportunities are everywhere.
Make everything as hard as possible. Resist every demand. Refuse entry without a warrant. Don’t take the buyout. Their problem solving skills are 📉
Opportunities are everywhere.
Make everything as hard as possible. Resist every demand. Refuse entry without a warrant. Don’t take the buyout. Their problem solving skills are 📉
Reposted by Jake Noll
if we staff ICE with Uvalde police officers, they'll never enter schools
January 28, 2025 at 5:27 PM
if we staff ICE with Uvalde police officers, they'll never enter schools
Reposted by Jake Noll
If you're in Illinois, you're on Section 8, and your landlord tries to evict you because of the government funding freeze, email me at [email protected]. My cases are pay-whatever-you-can.
January 28, 2025 at 6:39 PM
If you're in Illinois, you're on Section 8, and your landlord tries to evict you because of the government funding freeze, email me at [email protected]. My cases are pay-whatever-you-can.
You want a meritocracy but you’re afraid of white people going extinct? That sounds like our sun-burn prone, dog hair-having, spice-intolerant genetics just weren’t good enough to keep up.
January 27, 2025 at 5:05 PM
You want a meritocracy but you’re afraid of white people going extinct? That sounds like our sun-burn prone, dog hair-having, spice-intolerant genetics just weren’t good enough to keep up.
Most annoying thing about this is now I can’t fight with other trans people over dumb stuff like “who gets to say transsexual”
January 20, 2025 at 8:25 PM
Most annoying thing about this is now I can’t fight with other trans people over dumb stuff like “who gets to say transsexual”
Whitney Cummings roaming the hills with a sword was weirdly on my 2025 bingo card
January 11, 2025 at 10:23 PM
Whitney Cummings roaming the hills with a sword was weirdly on my 2025 bingo card
Alien writing human erotica:
“He looked at her with his fiery mustachioed eyes. She let her hand fall from where it rested at her throat to reveal her heaving clits.”
“He looked at her with his fiery mustachioed eyes. She let her hand fall from where it rested at her throat to reveal her heaving clits.”
January 3, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Alien writing human erotica:
“He looked at her with his fiery mustachioed eyes. She let her hand fall from where it rested at her throat to reveal her heaving clits.”
“He looked at her with his fiery mustachioed eyes. She let her hand fall from where it rested at her throat to reveal her heaving clits.”
If you're the type of person who feels sexy at the gym we are not friends.
December 21, 2024 at 9:40 PM
If you're the type of person who feels sexy at the gym we are not friends.
At what age to women become obsessed with things be ing “drafty?”
December 12, 2024 at 10:26 PM
At what age to women become obsessed with things be ing “drafty?”
Good morning! Here’s some ways to ruin your day before it’s even started:
- put your phone full brightness on your eye
- breathe shallow
- remember the concept of a “starter home”
- put your phone full brightness on your eye
- breathe shallow
- remember the concept of a “starter home”
December 2, 2024 at 6:08 AM
Good morning! Here’s some ways to ruin your day before it’s even started:
- put your phone full brightness on your eye
- breathe shallow
- remember the concept of a “starter home”
- put your phone full brightness on your eye
- breathe shallow
- remember the concept of a “starter home”
Wondering if you’re an alcoholic? Let’s find out. Lemme see if I have a crush on you.
November 27, 2024 at 6:31 PM
Wondering if you’re an alcoholic? Let’s find out. Lemme see if I have a crush on you.
Saw a girl on tiktok advertising a pillow for her neck hump and I just really like how unashamed Gen Z is.
November 25, 2024 at 5:55 AM
Saw a girl on tiktok advertising a pillow for her neck hump and I just really like how unashamed Gen Z is.
Can tell I’m on a flight back to LA bc the snack is a handful of sea moss and a gently parented child is flying the plane.
November 24, 2024 at 10:21 PM
Can tell I’m on a flight back to LA bc the snack is a handful of sea moss and a gently parented child is flying the plane.
Can tell I’m on a flight back to LA bc the snack is a handful of sea moss and a gently parented child is flying the plane.
November 24, 2024 at 10:21 PM
Can tell I’m on a flight back to LA bc the snack is a handful of sea moss and a gently parented child is flying the plane.
2 grown cis men at a party stood frozen and unable to engage in conversation with me tonight. Later one of their wives said to my mom “he just doesn’t understand trans people.” Sir. I am not a kiosk you have to figure out how to use… but feel free to hand me your credit card. (I will eat it.)
November 22, 2024 at 5:35 AM
2 grown cis men at a party stood frozen and unable to engage in conversation with me tonight. Later one of their wives said to my mom “he just doesn’t understand trans people.” Sir. I am not a kiosk you have to figure out how to use… but feel free to hand me your credit card. (I will eat it.)
As a millennial, I do not have a retirement plan. My retirement plan is the apocalypse. My 401k is a body bag.
November 21, 2024 at 4:48 PM
As a millennial, I do not have a retirement plan. My retirement plan is the apocalypse. My 401k is a body bag.
After giving it some thought, I believe cis women ought to start using the men’s room. The line is shorter and no one is ever using the sinks.
November 19, 2024 at 5:14 AM
After giving it some thought, I believe cis women ought to start using the men’s room. The line is shorter and no one is ever using the sinks.
“qUiT eaTinG cHeeSe jAKe iT mAkEs YOu fARt moRe.”
You know how dumb you sound? Cheese is the only thing protecting me from friendly strangers.
You know how dumb you sound? Cheese is the only thing protecting me from friendly strangers.
November 19, 2024 at 12:57 AM
“qUiT eaTinG cHeeSe jAKe iT mAkEs YOu fARt moRe.”
You know how dumb you sound? Cheese is the only thing protecting me from friendly strangers.
You know how dumb you sound? Cheese is the only thing protecting me from friendly strangers.
WTF would I want to lucid dream? Sleeping is the only time I don’t have to do anything. You’re telling me I should want to make stuff happen?
November 19, 2024 at 12:55 AM
WTF would I want to lucid dream? Sleeping is the only time I don’t have to do anything. You’re telling me I should want to make stuff happen?
The much overlooked comrades of the revolution are the life coaches telling rich people to quit their CEO jobs and find “alignment.”
November 18, 2024 at 3:12 PM
The much overlooked comrades of the revolution are the life coaches telling rich people to quit their CEO jobs and find “alignment.”
Ah Sunday morning. Should I do a craft, cook, clean, or sit frozen and numb on the couch?
November 17, 2024 at 7:19 PM
Ah Sunday morning. Should I do a craft, cook, clean, or sit frozen and numb on the couch?
Couldn’t get Netflix to work so just watched 2 spiders fighting instead. The young one won.
November 16, 2024 at 5:38 AM
Couldn’t get Netflix to work so just watched 2 spiders fighting instead. The young one won.
Damn how is Jake Paul a more gracious winner than our next president?
November 16, 2024 at 5:36 AM
Damn how is Jake Paul a more gracious winner than our next president?