Jared Cowie
@jaredc.bsky.social
British/Australian/NZ screenwriter. Black List 2014. Occasional lawyer. Repped by Curtis Brown and UTA. WGAw.
How they square "thinks Covid is a bioweapon" and "masks are for sissies" is beyond me...
December 3, 2025 at 7:08 PM
How they square "thinks Covid is a bioweapon" and "masks are for sissies" is beyond me...
"Off-Licence" is a term for a liquor store in the UK.
December 3, 2025 at 1:30 PM
"Off-Licence" is a term for a liquor store in the UK.
Anyone who crops out half of a pie chart deserves a block. Fuckity bye!
December 2, 2025 at 10:59 AM
Anyone who crops out half of a pie chart deserves a block. Fuckity bye!
There's a really great breakdown of his (uncredited) rewrite work on Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade - well worth checking out: creativescreenwriting.com/indiana-jone...
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creativescreenwriting.com
November 30, 2025 at 7:11 PM
There's a really great breakdown of his (uncredited) rewrite work on Indiana Jones and The Last Crusade - well worth checking out: creativescreenwriting.com/indiana-jone...
Same reason it was illegal for you to fuck your sister.
November 30, 2025 at 4:32 PM
Same reason it was illegal for you to fuck your sister.
Wow. They, uh, they kinda walked into that one...
November 29, 2025 at 11:46 AM
Wow. They, uh, they kinda walked into that one...
Never have anything in your life that you can't crawl out on in 30 hours flat if you feel the heat around the corner
November 27, 2025 at 10:42 PM
Never have anything in your life that you can't crawl out on in 30 hours flat if you feel the heat around the corner
A window-cleaning accident waiting to happen.
November 22, 2025 at 9:38 PM
A window-cleaning accident waiting to happen.
I can't help but think about the obscene minerals deal that Drumpf extorted from Ukraine. And for what? The word of the United States of America.
The whole world now sees what that is worth.
The whole world now sees what that is worth.
November 22, 2025 at 4:21 PM
I can't help but think about the obscene minerals deal that Drumpf extorted from Ukraine. And for what? The word of the United States of America.
The whole world now sees what that is worth.
The whole world now sees what that is worth.
I don't know if he's on the apps, but I think this guy has a pass.
November 16, 2025 at 5:11 PM
I don't know if he's on the apps, but I think this guy has a pass.
Close to the smoking gun, huh? New book must be coming out.
November 15, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Close to the smoking gun, huh? New book must be coming out.
Let the [checks notes] nanobots reassemble him.
November 11, 2025 at 1:44 PM
Let the [checks notes] nanobots reassemble him.
Was it Emmy Noether? It’s insane how much modern science rests on her insights. How can she not be a household name?!
November 7, 2025 at 8:06 PM
Was it Emmy Noether? It’s insane how much modern science rests on her insights. How can she not be a household name?!
And if he offered you an apricot, best not to accept...
November 6, 2025 at 2:52 PM
And if he offered you an apricot, best not to accept...
I saw a suggestion that it was because he's getting lost on the way... 😬
November 6, 2025 at 10:50 AM
I saw a suggestion that it was because he's getting lost on the way... 😬
‘I made him a compelling offer.’
October 30, 2025 at 11:05 PM
‘I made him a compelling offer.’
Perhaps your sub-editor should read it first.
October 30, 2025 at 10:47 PM
Perhaps your sub-editor should read it first.
Someone should ask him to draw a clock.
October 27, 2025 at 1:47 PM
Someone should ask him to draw a clock.
Why can't we see something funny?
"I gotta hold onto my angst..."
"I gotta hold onto my angst..."
October 17, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Why can't we see something funny?
"I gotta hold onto my angst..."
"I gotta hold onto my angst..."
Just put the fries in the fucking bag.
October 15, 2025 at 12:17 PM
Just put the fries in the fucking bag.
One aspect of Kissinger's peace prize that is often overlooked is how much it enraged Nixon... Just... puttin' that out there.
October 9, 2025 at 7:21 AM
One aspect of Kissinger's peace prize that is often overlooked is how much it enraged Nixon... Just... puttin' that out there.
This is a discussion about a speech made by the leader of the opposition in the UK, so… er … thank you for your contribution. But now kindly fuck off.
October 8, 2025 at 10:54 AM
This is a discussion about a speech made by the leader of the opposition in the UK, so… er … thank you for your contribution. But now kindly fuck off.
I expect we’ll hear a lot about Kavanaugh stops in the aftermath of the midterms.
October 2, 2025 at 7:11 AM
I expect we’ll hear a lot about Kavanaugh stops in the aftermath of the midterms.
Literally boils down to him building his hopes up after being told “we have to find something to work on together”
September 30, 2025 at 5:36 PM
Literally boils down to him building his hopes up after being told “we have to find something to work on together”