Qu’e ne Pouvoirs

I absolutely hear "when is the last time you were in a nursing home" in the Buffalo Bill “was she a great big fat person” voice

"Ah, Thanksgiving! The mashed potatoes or maybe cauliflower. Raw, cold beans and baby carrots. Plain elbow pasta boiled and baked dry. Rolls from a tube. And of course, the centerpiece - a turkey breast baked from frozen and torn apart with my bare hands. Every last bite utterly unseasoned, natch."

“Holy fuck, 74-56! Did somebody hire Kliff Kingsbury?”

Only thing less likely is a footballer being openly bald

That's not weird, coffee tastes good and it's hot. I love an ice cream cone, including in the winter. If i went to Baskin Robbins in February in Alaska and asked them to microwave me scoop of mint chocolate chip, someone would call the looney bin.

Modest proposal: for centuries ordering "coffee" (and its relatives like espresso) specifically meant a hot beverage; accordingly, weirdos who want it iced should be forced to specify. Forgot to specify? Go home and get ice. It's August in Louisiana and you think it's obvious? You don't want coffee

Not sure I agree with you a hundred percent on your police work, there

Veteran backup catcher who hits .212 but can tell teammates how every pitcher in the division tips his pitches

"People often, often people I don't know well, reach out..."

This would get you a lot of red ink in the seventh grade.

Prompt: "express the idea 'he is very horny' in at least 400 words, with at least 37 adjectives and all possible verb conjugations"

The enemy of my enemy is still a horrible person and worthy of nothing but scorn

BREAKING: Biden's birth certificate indicates that he is 81 years old and continuing to age every day. However, insiders confirm that the president is, in fact, elderly - older than any person to hold the office previously.

My god, what a story! How did this reporter get this scoop?

Would that it were properly appreciated in its time

You may be right, and I don't know what the solution is, either. Imposing a time limit on putting the ball back in probably encourages the defending team to do even more to disrupt. Bringing the hoardings in to shorten run ups risks player health when the ball is in play near the touch lines. 🤷‍♂️

I see both sides of it. My beloved Villa scored 3 from set pieces/dead balls on Sunday. Great! OTOH I don't know anyone who watches because they love to see three guys standing over the ball talking with their hands on their mouths while the ref tries to stop 17 other guys from pushing/grabbing.

When he came out I thought "there goes the man of the match.

Wait no it's Buendia. Or no, maybe Martinez? But Konsa and Onana were both excellent..."

Nice problem to have!

The guy in the Sexy Grover meme?

When August and Everything After came out my friend Luke typed out and printed all the lyrics and brought them to school in a folder. When questioned he told everyone his brother wrote all of it. He kept telling that lie for like six months until everybody gave up